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kristens_bookshelf 's review for:
Mistletoe in Mayfair
by Lisa Marlowe
This book has such good potential but I found it to be just ok.
The first 25% of the book was so confusing. It felt like it was the first draft and it didn't get touched by an editor.
Lucy (FMC) has a best friend and they are the same age but her bestie calls her "kiddo" and "kid". Thats something my mom says to me and I say to my young niece, it felt weird between besties the same age. And then the bestie never shows back up in the book...friends for 20+yrs but just poof gone?
There was also cryptic things that were alluded to so it just left me saying "huh? Whats that even suppose to mean?" And 100pgs later it made sense but not enough of a tid-bit was given to make you understand at first, it just felt like an incomplete sentence or thought.
When Lucy first meets the MMC, Lucas, it's an encounter in the street while she is admiring a ring in a jewelery shop window and it's written almost like he is coming at her with the intention to mug her. She turns and runs into a jewelry store gets sandwiched between an employee and Lucas. He tells the employee "they" want to see the ring in the windows. They are lead to a private room, she tries on the ring (1 or 2 words are said between these two), MMC asks for a private moment, employee leaves and then MMC just starts playing touchy feely... with MAYBE 1 or 2 sentences exchanged. How does she go from running away to being stiff as this man touches her less than 5mins from seeing him on the street?
The middle 50% was good! Typical ChickLit with interesting characters and situations and well written. This seemed like a polished story.
And then the last 25% felt like a cheesy after school special. The wrap up was too fast.
Rewritten this could be a great story. The bones are there. There are good spicy moments, good emotional moments and funny as hell moments. They just aren't put together ideally. Also the title doesn't really fit...Christmas is the last couple chapters and at that point the story has been going on for about 6-8 months
The first 25% of the book was so confusing. It felt like it was the first draft and it didn't get touched by an editor.
Lucy (FMC) has a best friend and they are the same age but her bestie calls her "kiddo" and "kid". Thats something my mom says to me and I say to my young niece, it felt weird between besties the same age. And then the bestie never shows back up in the book...friends for 20+yrs but just poof gone?
There was also cryptic things that were alluded to so it just left me saying "huh? Whats that even suppose to mean?" And 100pgs later it made sense but not enough of a tid-bit was given to make you understand at first, it just felt like an incomplete sentence or thought.
When Lucy first meets the MMC, Lucas, it's an encounter in the street while she is admiring a ring in a jewelery shop window and it's written almost like he is coming at her with the intention to mug her. She turns and runs into a jewelry store gets sandwiched between an employee and Lucas. He tells the employee "they" want to see the ring in the windows. They are lead to a private room, she tries on the ring (1 or 2 words are said between these two), MMC asks for a private moment, employee leaves and then MMC just starts playing touchy feely... with MAYBE 1 or 2 sentences exchanged. How does she go from running away to being stiff as this man touches her less than 5mins from seeing him on the street?
The middle 50% was good! Typical ChickLit with interesting characters and situations and well written. This seemed like a polished story.
And then the last 25% felt like a cheesy after school special. The wrap up was too fast.
Rewritten this could be a great story. The bones are there. There are good spicy moments, good emotional moments and funny as hell moments. They just aren't put together ideally. Also the title doesn't really fit...Christmas is the last couple chapters and at that point the story has been going on for about 6-8 months