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A review by rbruehlman
The Woman in Me by Britney Spears
3.0
Britney Spears is a talented singer ... writer, not so much. She has a powerful story to tell, and some of that shows through a little, but ultimately, she lacks the writing ability to really share it meaningfully.
We'll call a spade a spade: Britney is about as talented at writing as I am at singing, which is to say, not at all. Her writing style is simplistic and staccato, with an impoverished vocabulary completely bereft of any emotive or complex words. Britney is never "resigned" or "dispirited" or "inconsolable"; she's just "sad." Or "angry." Or "upset." She rarely describes anything or paints an elaborate picture for the user; it's usually just something along the lines of "XYZ happened, and I felt X. Then ABC occurred, and that made me feel Y." If you imagine a ten-year-old writing the story of their life, you would get a pretty good approximation for how Britney writes. Although the situations Britney describes would probably stir up a huge array of complicated emotions for the average person, her retelling is barren and flat, which means that as a reader, it requires a lot of work to really deeply and effortlessly feel what Britney must have felt in any given situation.
If you can get past the bad writing, there are some compelling elements to Britney's story. I think the biggest impression for me was the cost of fame, especially at such a young age. Britney skyrocketed to unimaginable popularity in the late 90s, when she was just 16. The media scrutiny was intense; she was objectified and treated as a sex symbol, while also simultaneously shamed for said status. Everyone had an opinion on her. I don't know about you, but being 16 sucked enough; having the entire world criticize and pick you apart at that age? I can't even imagine. Hell, I would crumble under that kind of scrutiny even now, as an adult. Britney claims the media treated her to a double standard with Justin, and, you know, she's right; if Britney had sex, it was a scandal, but if a male celebrity made his rounds, it wasn't even newsworthy. And, man, the cost of fame--I can't even imagine what it would be like to have paparazzi following me everywhere. She aptly notes fame is fake, not real life, and I can see that. It's an unreality where everything unimportant you do matters immensely and is broadcast to everyone for judgment. That isn't real life, and it is in no way glamorous. Once the novelty wears off, it's actually really grueling and hard. Who wants to live like that?
And, of course, you can't just become "unfamous", at least not easily. As Britney's behavior became more erratic, probably in no small part from the paparazzi stalking, her behavior only fueled the media scrutiny. The worse she became, the more they hounded her, making her even worse. What a cruel cycle.
However, I don't feel like the book was entirely honest, or, at least, it didn't feel like Britney had the self-awareness to really explore her conservatorship in earnest. It felt like she painted a very one-sided picture of how it came to be and why it was in place. Maybe the conservatorship was justified, or maybe it wasn't, but conservatorships are very hard to get and aren't granted lightly. If they were that easy to get, California wouldn't have the homeless population it does; many of the homeless there are mentally ill, with families who are powerless to help because they cannot compel the person to accept mental health treatment.
Conservatorship-worthy or not, at no point does Britney ever admit, "Wow, I was really out of control," or "I needed help because I wasn't thinking straight," even though my hazy recollections of Britney Spears back in the day was of erratic and bizarre behavior. She always has a ready excuse / reason for why she did a thing, but, in the process, she downplays things. Locking yourself in a room refusing to give your child back and creating a hostage situation is kind of a big deal, but, the way Britney tells it, it was a perfectly reasonable course of action. I don't think she ever really appreciates why some of her behavior was alarming. In her mind, her actions made perfect sense. Everyone else was the unreasonable one. It's hard to not take Britney with a grain of salt when she points the finger at everyone else, and rarely herself.
It felt odd that so many people were supposedly "colluding" to keep her subjugated, and that she had done nothing really serious to get herself to the point she did. Britney would make you think she was just having fun, and her dad overreacted. In addition to the difficulty of getting a conservatorship granted at all, courts didn't grant her 50/50 child custody, and her boyfriend Hesam doesn't appear to campaign to get her released from treatment. I wondered if he must have thought she needed it? If my significant other was in a conservatorship based on mental competency that I felt was undeserved, you had better bet I'd be campaigning to get them out of it. Why were Hesam and the others complacent with the situation? I can't help but think others around Britney saw something she couldn't.
I think ultimately, my opinion based on limited information is that Britney was mentally ill, and the court gave her father power that he then abused. A conservatorship is not supposed to be like the one she had; is that a fault of the conservatorship system itself, or the person who was put in charge of it all? It is absolutely tragic how her father treated her, and I'm glad he no longer has the right. He abused it. But it's hard to take the book entirely seriously because everything was explained from her perspective--one in which she never seemed to do anything really that bad or wrong--and completely lacked the nuance I suspect probably actually existed for her case.
I feel for the woman; she has not led an easy life. She's been through a lot. Between the writing style and one-sidedness, something about the book rings strangely. I wish her the best.
We'll call a spade a spade: Britney is about as talented at writing as I am at singing, which is to say, not at all. Her writing style is simplistic and staccato, with an impoverished vocabulary completely bereft of any emotive or complex words. Britney is never "resigned" or "dispirited" or "inconsolable"; she's just "sad." Or "angry." Or "upset." She rarely describes anything or paints an elaborate picture for the user; it's usually just something along the lines of "XYZ happened, and I felt X. Then ABC occurred, and that made me feel Y." If you imagine a ten-year-old writing the story of their life, you would get a pretty good approximation for how Britney writes. Although the situations Britney describes would probably stir up a huge array of complicated emotions for the average person, her retelling is barren and flat, which means that as a reader, it requires a lot of work to really deeply and effortlessly feel what Britney must have felt in any given situation.
If you can get past the bad writing, there are some compelling elements to Britney's story. I think the biggest impression for me was the cost of fame, especially at such a young age. Britney skyrocketed to unimaginable popularity in the late 90s, when she was just 16. The media scrutiny was intense; she was objectified and treated as a sex symbol, while also simultaneously shamed for said status. Everyone had an opinion on her. I don't know about you, but being 16 sucked enough; having the entire world criticize and pick you apart at that age? I can't even imagine. Hell, I would crumble under that kind of scrutiny even now, as an adult. Britney claims the media treated her to a double standard with Justin, and, you know, she's right; if Britney had sex, it was a scandal, but if a male celebrity made his rounds, it wasn't even newsworthy. And, man, the cost of fame--I can't even imagine what it would be like to have paparazzi following me everywhere. She aptly notes fame is fake, not real life, and I can see that. It's an unreality where everything unimportant you do matters immensely and is broadcast to everyone for judgment. That isn't real life, and it is in no way glamorous. Once the novelty wears off, it's actually really grueling and hard. Who wants to live like that?
And, of course, you can't just become "unfamous", at least not easily. As Britney's behavior became more erratic, probably in no small part from the paparazzi stalking, her behavior only fueled the media scrutiny. The worse she became, the more they hounded her, making her even worse. What a cruel cycle.
However, I don't feel like the book was entirely honest, or, at least, it didn't feel like Britney had the self-awareness to really explore her conservatorship in earnest. It felt like she painted a very one-sided picture of how it came to be and why it was in place. Maybe the conservatorship was justified, or maybe it wasn't, but conservatorships are very hard to get and aren't granted lightly. If they were that easy to get, California wouldn't have the homeless population it does; many of the homeless there are mentally ill, with families who are powerless to help because they cannot compel the person to accept mental health treatment.
Conservatorship-worthy or not, at no point does Britney ever admit, "Wow, I was really out of control," or "I needed help because I wasn't thinking straight," even though my hazy recollections of Britney Spears back in the day was of erratic and bizarre behavior. She always has a ready excuse / reason for why she did a thing, but, in the process, she downplays things. Locking yourself in a room refusing to give your child back and creating a hostage situation is kind of a big deal, but, the way Britney tells it, it was a perfectly reasonable course of action. I don't think she ever really appreciates why some of her behavior was alarming. In her mind, her actions made perfect sense. Everyone else was the unreasonable one. It's hard to not take Britney with a grain of salt when she points the finger at everyone else, and rarely herself.
It felt odd that so many people were supposedly "colluding" to keep her subjugated, and that she had done nothing really serious to get herself to the point she did. Britney would make you think she was just having fun, and her dad overreacted. In addition to the difficulty of getting a conservatorship granted at all, courts didn't grant her 50/50 child custody, and her boyfriend Hesam doesn't appear to campaign to get her released from treatment. I wondered if he must have thought she needed it? If my significant other was in a conservatorship based on mental competency that I felt was undeserved, you had better bet I'd be campaigning to get them out of it. Why were Hesam and the others complacent with the situation? I can't help but think others around Britney saw something she couldn't.
I think ultimately, my opinion based on limited information is that Britney was mentally ill, and the court gave her father power that he then abused. A conservatorship is not supposed to be like the one she had; is that a fault of the conservatorship system itself, or the person who was put in charge of it all? It is absolutely tragic how her father treated her, and I'm glad he no longer has the right. He abused it. But it's hard to take the book entirely seriously because everything was explained from her perspective--one in which she never seemed to do anything really that bad or wrong--and completely lacked the nuance I suspect probably actually existed for her case.
I feel for the woman; she has not led an easy life. She's been through a lot. Between the writing style and one-sidedness, something about the book rings strangely. I wish her the best.