Scan barcode
A review by hobbit_tomes
You Exist Too Much by Zaina Arafat
reflective
- Loveable characters? It's complicated
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
4.25
You Exist Too Much by Zaina Arafat is the story of a Palestinian American woman (unnamed) as she struggles with her bisexuality, mental health, and her relationship with her mother, and how said relationship has affected her view of love.
In the story, we follow as our main character checks herself into a rehab center for love addiction, and it is here where she begins to confront and acknowledge her behavior in previous relationships. Most of all, she is forced to confront her feelings regarding her mother and how her mother treated her throughout her life, especially in regards to her sexuality. Throughout the story, we frequently flashback to moments of the main character’s memories of her time in Palestine, as well as her previous relationships in order to provide context for her struggles in the present.
I really enjoyed seeing our main character come to terms with her behavior and take responsibility for the unrealistic expectations she put on her partners and her relationships.
Im glad that we also got to see flashbacks of the mother’s childhood in Palestine and how she came to be the person she is as an adult and a parent. It reminds us that she is not an all evil villain, but rather a person who has had her own struggles in life and gives the reader context for why she acts the way she does.
One of the aspects I loved most about this story is how it touches on the alienation one feels when growing up in America as a person of color. The main character explains how she doesn’t feel fully accepted by her Palestinian heritage because she was not born and raised there and does not speak the language perfectly. She is not welcomed by her family members with the excitement and enthusiasm that her mother is and, feels as though they simply tolerate her presence. But, she also doesn’t feel fully accepted in America, despite living there her whole life. Being Palestinian in America means that she has been othered and excluded her entire life. It was very relatable and I appreciated the story touching on that sentiment.
All in all, I really enjoyed this story and would highly recommend it!
CW/TW: Addiction, Biphobia, Eating Disorder, Toxic Relationship, Sexual Content
In the story, we follow as our main character checks herself into a rehab center for love addiction, and it is here where she begins to confront and acknowledge her behavior in previous relationships. Most of all, she is forced to confront her feelings regarding her mother and how her mother treated her throughout her life, especially in regards to her sexuality. Throughout the story, we frequently flashback to moments of the main character’s memories of her time in Palestine, as well as her previous relationships in order to provide context for her struggles in the present.
I really enjoyed seeing our main character come to terms with her behavior and take responsibility for the unrealistic expectations she put on her partners and her relationships.
Im glad that we also got to see flashbacks of the mother’s childhood in Palestine and how she came to be the person she is as an adult and a parent. It reminds us that she is not an all evil villain, but rather a person who has had her own struggles in life and gives the reader context for why she acts the way she does.
One of the aspects I loved most about this story is how it touches on the alienation one feels when growing up in America as a person of color. The main character explains how she doesn’t feel fully accepted by her Palestinian heritage because she was not born and raised there and does not speak the language perfectly. She is not welcomed by her family members with the excitement and enthusiasm that her mother is and, feels as though they simply tolerate her presence. But, she also doesn’t feel fully accepted in America, despite living there her whole life. Being Palestinian in America means that she has been othered and excluded her entire life. It was very relatable and I appreciated the story touching on that sentiment.
All in all, I really enjoyed this story and would highly recommend it!
CW/TW: Addiction, Biphobia, Eating Disorder, Toxic Relationship, Sexual Content