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A review by ritual
The Moon Dwellers by David Estes
2.0
I'm going to start this off by saying I received a free copy of The Moon Dwellers from the author (who is not, it appears, CIA Counterterrorist Center Director David Estes from Showtime's Homeland, just in case anyone was wondering, although that would have made for an interesting twist) in exchange for an honest review. So, I'm going to be honest.
I'd hope this information would either be presented in an grand, introductory way in the beginning of the story or — more preferably to my tastes, at least — built up and gathered over the course of the book, subtly revealed here and there as it pertained to the plot (of which there were many wasted occasions). Instead, Estes waits until the half-way point (Chapter 12, at 49% on my Kindle) and throws the breaks on the action he's built up (his female lead, Adele, has just kidnapped/rescued her little sister from an orphanage and she and her friends are being pursued on foot by "President" Nailin's bloodthirsty hired assassin, Rivet, and gang) for a big old info dump of pretty much 500 years of history. He even seems self-conscious about it because, when he's done, his male lead, Tristan Nailin, son of the Prez and next in line for the throne, narrates: "I don't know why I'm thinking about history right now, but I am." Yeah, I don't know why you are either, Tristan. I could have forgiven a lot more of the perceived flaws if the world building on the page would have been handled in a more graceful, engaging way.
The world itself seemed heavily inspired by Suzanne Collins's The Hunger Games and Veronica Roth's Divergent. The Sun Realm was very reminiscent of Collins's Capitol, the other realms the less-fortunate Districts who rise up against tyranny. The underground setting was very much like Roth's Dauntless headquarters. This is not necessarily the worst thing in the world, but it left me feeling like it was ground already tread and, at least in the case of The Hunger Games, in a more compelling way. If the revolution against the Sun Realm is supposed to be the main impetus behind the plot of this trilogy, I really needed to feel the pain and get a clearer picture of all the various injustices being committed against the other two realms beyond Adele's and Cole's families' stories, the Sun Realm cheating them out of electricity, and oh yeah, President Nailin being a big, bad meanie. Just because the characters say so over and over again. I don't think we see him actually do much of anything in the book beyond insisting his son calls him Sir, not smiling in pictures, eating a meal at a ridiculously long table with Tristan and his brother, Killen, denying Tristan a trip to the Moon Realm for his vacation and sending him to a really nice spa resort instead, and sending Rivet and some thugs after some teenagers who escaped from the post-apocalyptic version of juvie "The Pen" (because apparently there's nothing more important for these guys to be doing... it's not like there's full-blown terrorist attacks going on in the Moon Realm or anything). I hope the subsequent books paint a more detailed picture.
That being said, Adele's and Cole's (especially Cole's, which goes to surprisingly dark places) backstories are compelling. The prologue, which gives us our first glimpse of Adele's background was taut, intense, and there were subtle hints at what her life was like without launching into lengthy details that would have detracted from the pacing of the action (a problem encountered later on). Unfortunately, this was one of the high points of the book for me. With a click of single page turn on my Kindle, I was literally thrown headfirst into a Nonsenseville. The first paragraph of Chapter One launches this inane plot device I've been calling "Pain at First Sight" in my head the whole time. When she and Tristan see each other for the first time, instead of experiencing the rush of hormones and flutter of attraction, they both experience physical pain they can't explain. It's a twist on the conventional so I was willing to keep going to see what the explanation could possibly be in a book without any visible supernatural elements but... nothing. Nothing. No explanation even by the end of the book, which is probably one of the only hooks that will keep me reading. Not to mention, this idea of romanticizing pain became more and more problematic for me over time, especially in moments where the characters glorified physical pain as a positive thing, e.g. Tristan: "Pain is the great equalizer, the cure to mental anguish..." "The beauty of physical pain is that it wipes out the other forms of pain. Not necessarily completely or for an extended period of time, but long enough to grant a reprieve from my tortured mind and soul." Adele: "A little bit of physical pain always seems to help with the mental pain, helps me forget about the reality of life... It also helps me focus." This is dangerous, troubling logic to be promoting in a YA book of all things, to readers who might cut or think about cutting themselves with exactly this sort of justification in mind.
Unfortunately for Cole, he's killed off too soon to do much of anything to resolve his own story, and instead is just relegated to the annals of history as yet another token black friend who is just there to help the white main character achieve her goals and be the first one sacrificed to the cause. I never quite bought why Cole and their other Pen friend, Tawni, were willing to risk their lives for someone they met literally days before but it was yet another one of those conventions I swallowed down for the sake of the story. Roc, on the other hand, may or may not have also been a person of color (and he happens to be Tristan's servant — ugh — and best friend). At one point his skin is described as "brown" but later on he's described as "white as a ghost," so... which is it? I'm still not sure. Maybe people have developed the ability to switch races at will after 499 years underground.
I liked Roc the most, though, because there were so many times he said exactly what I was thinking, which was mostly: "Are we seriously risking our lives to find some random criminal chick who causes you pain just because you're convinced it means something?" Unfortunately, he did a 180 pretty much immediately every time and went back to being Tristan's loyal companion. I understand the value of illustrating a strong friendship, but I think there might have been a more interesting story in Roc thinking it was all completely ridiculous (it was) and remaining the voice of reason while reluctantly helping anyway because he cares so much for Tristan and would protect him to the end instead of just buying into the schmaltzy destiny crap. I also liked Roc because I felt like there was another story underneath his devotion to Tristan; this may not have been the intention of the author at all but I felt like Roc (and maybe even Tristan) felt a little more than friendship or brotherly love toward each other, if you know what I mean. There are numerous homoerotic moments between the two of them, Tristan regularly insists he doesn't sleep with all the beautiful girls that throw themselves at him, and, at times, Roc seems a bit jealous of this mysterious girl they're chasing. I highly doubt this is what Estes had in mind or that it factors into the storyline at all in the following novels, but if it did, I'd applaud him. As it is, I enjoyed the fact that he was brave enough to show men who aren't embarrassed to show physical and emotional affection toward one another. It definitely does not have to be read in a romantic or sexual way. That was definitely a strong point for me.
On the flip side, I was very confused about how I was supposed to read Adele and how other characters in the book read her as well. It's too bad that such an ass kicker was strapped with the typical YA girl insecurity of not thinking she's pretty even though she clearly is (beyond her questionable hygiene while in the Pen): "If Tawni and I are the lead characters in a magical fairy tale, it is obvious who the ugly stepsister is. Not Tawni." I get that it's a trope in YA because most teenage girls are insecure about their looks and this helps them relate to the character, but perpetuating the trope only helps perpetuate the problem. Body image issues are awful. Wouldn't it be wonderful to give girls a role model who's confident of (or, at least, doesn't focus on) her appearance?
I was even more let down by the following passage: "If he was a girl, I wouldn't care one bit, but for some reason with guys it is different. I always feel like I have to try to be equal to them, like I have something to prove." Try to be equal to them? Oh girl. Did feminism not make the trip underground? I guess not. That said, she's a capable fighter (she was trained by her father) and, thankfully, doesn't feel the need to wait around for a man to save her time and time again, which is a positive. (Unfortunately all the violence did take a troubling turn for me when Tristan kills someone just because he's "not in the mood" to show a man mercy who begs for it or when Adele murders Rivet to avenge Cole's death and neither of them reflect on it at all afterward.) But her physical appearance and her other (much more important) qualities seem to swap the spotlight at center stage, especially as far as Tristan is concerned... he seems to insist her looks aren't what's important (good) but when he's first describing her to Roc, we get this full-blown dudebro description of her curves and stuff, man, with a strange mix of poetic musing on her hair (which perfectly represents the unevenness of the writing in general, especially as far as dialogue goes): "So I see this girl, this moon dweller. Roc, lemme tell ya, she was pretty hot. Beautiful. Even wearing her gray prisoner's tunic she was stunning. Her hair fell like a black waterfall around her shoulders. Her eyes were intensely fascinating. And her curves, my God, Roc, were they ever—" Cue Roc's jealousy. Heh. In all seriousness, it was just one of many cases of mixed signals being thrown around and not in a productive way.
This is getting to be a small novel in and of itself, so I'm going to cut to the chase: the end. I'm extremely pleased that Estes didn't sell out and turn it into a full blown love affair (in fact, the characters have yet to do much more than hold hands) as soon as they finally meet each other. Not only would it have been unrealistic (they've just killed people and Adele has witnessed Cole's murder) but it would have ruined what pacing there was to the story. It also would have killed this book and this series for me completely, so I'm really glad he chose the road less traveled here. Of course, there's a lot of really ridiculous talk about how each of them would die for the other one before they've even officially met — Adele: "As much as I am willing to throw my life away in an effort to save Tristan, the causer of pain, I know I can't abandon Elsey." Really? Good to know your sister is more important to you than some random stranger who makes you physically hurt every time you're near him. Tristan, when he believes Adele has been killed: "There is no physical pain that can eclipse the emotional anguish I feel. The only antidote to how I am feeling is death. I hope Killen will finish me off." Seriously, dude? Talk about melodramatic.
The final scenes in which Adele's father gives her her mission that will seemingly be the plot of the next book in the trilogy were not any more realistic. Her father wants her to break into a maximum security prison in the Star Realm and rescue her mother. Okay, dad, sure, easy, no problem. Oh, you won't come with me because you need to stick around and be a father to my little sister, even though nowhere you can go is safe anyway? Sure, that makes perfect sense. Enjoy your domestic bliss, just let the teenager handle everything. I'll just take my pal Tawni with me and maybe this convenient slingshot that showed up right when we needed it to and we'll be on our way. Oy.
A few more minor things: nonsensical metaphors, awkward dialogue, repeated use of the same phrases to describe characters (Elsey, in particular, is always defined by whether she's acting her age or acting more mature than her age... we get it), the attention to the Mary Sue-ish hair and eye colors (violet eyes, really?), the constant telling of things that have already been shown or could have been demonstrated rather than spoon feeding the reader every aspect of the characters' personalities or motivations.
To end on a positive note, because I realize this review may have come off as harsh: I will be reading the next book in the series at the very least. I, like Tristan and Adele, can't stop until I understand what is causing all this pain, even if it causes me a little more pain in the process. I will remain hopeful for added depth of character in both the cast and the world as I continue. I can see Tristan's character taking on a very interesting role if he uses the power afforded to him in a positive way, and I hope to see Adele grow stronger as she ditches the boys and goes off on a girl power quest with her BFF Tawni to the stars. Well, the Star Realm, at least. Thanks again to David Estes for the opportunity to read and review.
Spoiler
I really wanted to love this book. I really did. I'll be honest, I got drawn in by the cover, which, congratulations, is pretty cool. The world Estes created is a dark one, a vision of the distant aftermath of a meteor strike on Earth that was predicted so far in advance that the U.S. government had time to build an underground world for people to live in. Alright. I'll suspend disbelief, just because. A lottery was then established in order to determine who would get to survive and become the next generation of Mole People. Cool. (It reminds me of the premise of the short-lived TV show Terra Nova on Fox, except there they were going through some kind of portal to a parallel universe 85 million years in the past and hanging with the dinosaurs. Anyone? Anyone?) The idea of the lottery, in general, is scary and twisted and made me realize I definitely would have been among the (assumed?) billions who died above ground because of tsunamis and all that apocalyptic stuff. I mean, I never win raffles and I'm an English major. (Glad to hear at least one set of Harry Potter books made it underground in time, though. Thumbs up.) From there, the government gradually deteriorated into what amounts to the patriarchal dynasty of the Nailin family for the past 350 years. Somewhere in there, as the distribution of wealth became more and more uneven, the people in charge were like, hey, these poor people are annoying and are totally getting in the way of the additional sweet resorts and mansions we could be building, let's make them dig out new levels of hell and banish them there. So the Sun (rich), Moon (middle class), and the Star (poor) realms were born.I'd hope this information would either be presented in an grand, introductory way in the beginning of the story or — more preferably to my tastes, at least — built up and gathered over the course of the book, subtly revealed here and there as it pertained to the plot (of which there were many wasted occasions). Instead, Estes waits until the half-way point (Chapter 12, at 49% on my Kindle) and throws the breaks on the action he's built up (his female lead, Adele, has just kidnapped/rescued her little sister from an orphanage and she and her friends are being pursued on foot by "President" Nailin's bloodthirsty hired assassin, Rivet, and gang) for a big old info dump of pretty much 500 years of history. He even seems self-conscious about it because, when he's done, his male lead, Tristan Nailin, son of the Prez and next in line for the throne, narrates: "I don't know why I'm thinking about history right now, but I am." Yeah, I don't know why you are either, Tristan. I could have forgiven a lot more of the perceived flaws if the world building on the page would have been handled in a more graceful, engaging way.
The world itself seemed heavily inspired by Suzanne Collins's The Hunger Games and Veronica Roth's Divergent. The Sun Realm was very reminiscent of Collins's Capitol, the other realms the less-fortunate Districts who rise up against tyranny. The underground setting was very much like Roth's Dauntless headquarters. This is not necessarily the worst thing in the world, but it left me feeling like it was ground already tread and, at least in the case of The Hunger Games, in a more compelling way. If the revolution against the Sun Realm is supposed to be the main impetus behind the plot of this trilogy, I really needed to feel the pain and get a clearer picture of all the various injustices being committed against the other two realms beyond Adele's and Cole's families' stories, the Sun Realm cheating them out of electricity, and oh yeah, President Nailin being a big, bad meanie. Just because the characters say so over and over again. I don't think we see him actually do much of anything in the book beyond insisting his son calls him Sir, not smiling in pictures, eating a meal at a ridiculously long table with Tristan and his brother, Killen, denying Tristan a trip to the Moon Realm for his vacation and sending him to a really nice spa resort instead, and sending Rivet and some thugs after some teenagers who escaped from the post-apocalyptic version of juvie "The Pen" (because apparently there's nothing more important for these guys to be doing... it's not like there's full-blown terrorist attacks going on in the Moon Realm or anything). I hope the subsequent books paint a more detailed picture.
That being said, Adele's and Cole's (especially Cole's, which goes to surprisingly dark places) backstories are compelling. The prologue, which gives us our first glimpse of Adele's background was taut, intense, and there were subtle hints at what her life was like without launching into lengthy details that would have detracted from the pacing of the action (a problem encountered later on). Unfortunately, this was one of the high points of the book for me. With a click of single page turn on my Kindle, I was literally thrown headfirst into a Nonsenseville. The first paragraph of Chapter One launches this inane plot device I've been calling "Pain at First Sight" in my head the whole time. When she and Tristan see each other for the first time, instead of experiencing the rush of hormones and flutter of attraction, they both experience physical pain they can't explain. It's a twist on the conventional so I was willing to keep going to see what the explanation could possibly be in a book without any visible supernatural elements but... nothing. Nothing. No explanation even by the end of the book, which is probably one of the only hooks that will keep me reading. Not to mention, this idea of romanticizing pain became more and more problematic for me over time, especially in moments where the characters glorified physical pain as a positive thing, e.g. Tristan: "Pain is the great equalizer, the cure to mental anguish..." "The beauty of physical pain is that it wipes out the other forms of pain. Not necessarily completely or for an extended period of time, but long enough to grant a reprieve from my tortured mind and soul." Adele: "A little bit of physical pain always seems to help with the mental pain, helps me forget about the reality of life... It also helps me focus." This is dangerous, troubling logic to be promoting in a YA book of all things, to readers who might cut or think about cutting themselves with exactly this sort of justification in mind.
Unfortunately for Cole, he's killed off too soon to do much of anything to resolve his own story, and instead is just relegated to the annals of history as yet another token black friend who is just there to help the white main character achieve her goals and be the first one sacrificed to the cause. I never quite bought why Cole and their other Pen friend, Tawni, were willing to risk their lives for someone they met literally days before but it was yet another one of those conventions I swallowed down for the sake of the story. Roc, on the other hand, may or may not have also been a person of color (and he happens to be Tristan's servant — ugh — and best friend). At one point his skin is described as "brown" but later on he's described as "white as a ghost," so... which is it? I'm still not sure. Maybe people have developed the ability to switch races at will after 499 years underground.
I liked Roc the most, though, because there were so many times he said exactly what I was thinking, which was mostly: "Are we seriously risking our lives to find some random criminal chick who causes you pain just because you're convinced it means something?" Unfortunately, he did a 180 pretty much immediately every time and went back to being Tristan's loyal companion. I understand the value of illustrating a strong friendship, but I think there might have been a more interesting story in Roc thinking it was all completely ridiculous (it was) and remaining the voice of reason while reluctantly helping anyway because he cares so much for Tristan and would protect him to the end instead of just buying into the schmaltzy destiny crap. I also liked Roc because I felt like there was another story underneath his devotion to Tristan; this may not have been the intention of the author at all but I felt like Roc (and maybe even Tristan) felt a little more than friendship or brotherly love toward each other, if you know what I mean. There are numerous homoerotic moments between the two of them, Tristan regularly insists he doesn't sleep with all the beautiful girls that throw themselves at him, and, at times, Roc seems a bit jealous of this mysterious girl they're chasing. I highly doubt this is what Estes had in mind or that it factors into the storyline at all in the following novels, but if it did, I'd applaud him. As it is, I enjoyed the fact that he was brave enough to show men who aren't embarrassed to show physical and emotional affection toward one another. It definitely does not have to be read in a romantic or sexual way. That was definitely a strong point for me.
On the flip side, I was very confused about how I was supposed to read Adele and how other characters in the book read her as well. It's too bad that such an ass kicker was strapped with the typical YA girl insecurity of not thinking she's pretty even though she clearly is (beyond her questionable hygiene while in the Pen): "If Tawni and I are the lead characters in a magical fairy tale, it is obvious who the ugly stepsister is. Not Tawni." I get that it's a trope in YA because most teenage girls are insecure about their looks and this helps them relate to the character, but perpetuating the trope only helps perpetuate the problem. Body image issues are awful. Wouldn't it be wonderful to give girls a role model who's confident of (or, at least, doesn't focus on) her appearance?
I was even more let down by the following passage: "If he was a girl, I wouldn't care one bit, but for some reason with guys it is different. I always feel like I have to try to be equal to them, like I have something to prove." Try to be equal to them? Oh girl. Did feminism not make the trip underground? I guess not. That said, she's a capable fighter (she was trained by her father) and, thankfully, doesn't feel the need to wait around for a man to save her time and time again, which is a positive. (Unfortunately all the violence did take a troubling turn for me when Tristan kills someone just because he's "not in the mood" to show a man mercy who begs for it or when Adele murders Rivet to avenge Cole's death and neither of them reflect on it at all afterward.) But her physical appearance and her other (much more important) qualities seem to swap the spotlight at center stage, especially as far as Tristan is concerned... he seems to insist her looks aren't what's important (good) but when he's first describing her to Roc, we get this full-blown dudebro description of her curves and stuff, man, with a strange mix of poetic musing on her hair (which perfectly represents the unevenness of the writing in general, especially as far as dialogue goes): "So I see this girl, this moon dweller. Roc, lemme tell ya, she was pretty hot. Beautiful. Even wearing her gray prisoner's tunic she was stunning. Her hair fell like a black waterfall around her shoulders. Her eyes were intensely fascinating. And her curves, my God, Roc, were they ever—" Cue Roc's jealousy. Heh. In all seriousness, it was just one of many cases of mixed signals being thrown around and not in a productive way.
This is getting to be a small novel in and of itself, so I'm going to cut to the chase: the end. I'm extremely pleased that Estes didn't sell out and turn it into a full blown love affair (in fact, the characters have yet to do much more than hold hands) as soon as they finally meet each other. Not only would it have been unrealistic (they've just killed people and Adele has witnessed Cole's murder) but it would have ruined what pacing there was to the story. It also would have killed this book and this series for me completely, so I'm really glad he chose the road less traveled here. Of course, there's a lot of really ridiculous talk about how each of them would die for the other one before they've even officially met — Adele: "As much as I am willing to throw my life away in an effort to save Tristan, the causer of pain, I know I can't abandon Elsey." Really? Good to know your sister is more important to you than some random stranger who makes you physically hurt every time you're near him. Tristan, when he believes Adele has been killed: "There is no physical pain that can eclipse the emotional anguish I feel. The only antidote to how I am feeling is death. I hope Killen will finish me off." Seriously, dude? Talk about melodramatic.
The final scenes in which Adele's father gives her her mission that will seemingly be the plot of the next book in the trilogy were not any more realistic. Her father wants her to break into a maximum security prison in the Star Realm and rescue her mother. Okay, dad, sure, easy, no problem. Oh, you won't come with me because you need to stick around and be a father to my little sister, even though nowhere you can go is safe anyway? Sure, that makes perfect sense. Enjoy your domestic bliss, just let the teenager handle everything. I'll just take my pal Tawni with me and maybe this convenient slingshot that showed up right when we needed it to and we'll be on our way. Oy.
A few more minor things: nonsensical metaphors, awkward dialogue, repeated use of the same phrases to describe characters (Elsey, in particular, is always defined by whether she's acting her age or acting more mature than her age... we get it), the attention to the Mary Sue-ish hair and eye colors (violet eyes, really?), the constant telling of things that have already been shown or could have been demonstrated rather than spoon feeding the reader every aspect of the characters' personalities or motivations.
To end on a positive note, because I realize this review may have come off as harsh: I will be reading the next book in the series at the very least. I, like Tristan and Adele, can't stop until I understand what is causing all this pain, even if it causes me a little more pain in the process. I will remain hopeful for added depth of character in both the cast and the world as I continue. I can see Tristan's character taking on a very interesting role if he uses the power afforded to him in a positive way, and I hope to see Adele grow stronger as she ditches the boys and goes off on a girl power quest with her BFF Tawni to the stars. Well, the Star Realm, at least. Thanks again to David Estes for the opportunity to read and review.