A review by katiehicks
Sometimes I Trip On How Happy We Could Be by Nichole Perkins

3.0

 There were some amazing essays in this collection- my favorites were “Softness”, “My Brother the Superhero”, and “HBCUs Taught Me”. I also really related to “Bones, Depression, and Me” and the weird feeling of binge-watching a relatively mindless show while in a depressive episode and how it becomes a bitter-sweet but really important show in your life (mine was The Office).

That being said, I didn’t love the discussions of cheating and her experiences as “the other woman”, because she seems to start by saying that men cheating should not become a contest between women, (which I loved) but then she ends up basically saying she bears no responsibility. I agree that she should not be held responsible for his decisions, and that what he did was arguably worse because he was the one with an obligation which he betrayed, but that does not mean that she didn’t do anything wrong. I don’t love the framing of cheating as “getting what you need, even if it's from unexpected places,” which feels like using sex-positive feminism as an excuse for bad behavior. I appreciated that it was a somewhat nuanced discussion, and I can acknowledge that nothing involving human feelings is ever black and white, but it still felt a little icky to me because I really don’t like cheating. Also, sometimes the way she talks about men felt very objectifying- again, it felt like using the veil of feminism but really just treating people poorly. (then again, I appreciated that she didn’t sugar-coat herself or make herself look better).