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steelheartsavior 's review for:
Wildest Dreams
by Kristen Ashley
Okay, normally my reviews are pretty short but I have taken my time on this one.
First of all let me just say, I really wanted to like this book. Really, I did.
When I first started the book I was optimistic. I liked the way the author just jumped into the story. I liked Finnie's attitude. I liked that Finnie was and adventure despite being feminine.
However this novel had one big problem from the very beginning: Frey Drakker.
Normally I am a sucker for a hot, brawny, dominate male. Really. And usually I can separate life from fiction and enjoy those type of characters even when they have questionable moral alignments. But Frey crossed the line. Repeatedly. I understand this character was raised in a very different world and therefor has different set of morals but honestly I don't think that is a good enough excuse for half the shit he did.
His list of fucked up practices include (but are not limited to)
1.Coercing a women into sexual acts even when she makes it clear she is not ready
2. Forcibly binding that woman to his world without telling her
3. Belittling and degrading said woman for having genuine feelings
4. Switching out his wife's birth control without telling her (even though she said in one of their first conversations that she wanted to wait to have children)
7. Longing for the day that his adventurous wife (the quality he apparently loves about her) is pregnant so he can make her stay home and cage her in to "keep her safe"
6. Forcing his wife to abandon her hobbies (for her "protection") when she becomes pregnant, in spite of the fact that she wants to continue.
7. In general making decisions for her and not "allowing" her to do things she wants to do
All of this pretty much makes him despicable in my eyes. However my BIGGEST problem with Frey is how Finnie acts around him. She gives into everything he wants. Even if she initially protests she eventually relents. She forgives every single fucked up thing he ever does. We are led to believe that Finnie is this badass, strong, adventurer, however she shows no agency throughout the entire book. She simply goes along with Frey. It really, really bothered me.
I think novels like this are very, very dangerous. By showing that because Finnie and Frey "love" each other, Finnie can easily forgive everything Frey ever did because he did it out of love... We set a dangerous example to women and men about what a healthy relationship entails. By romanticizing abusive relationships, we help cultivate a culture where that abuse is seen as normal.
My other big problem with this book, and yeah I know some are going to roll their eyes but I am going there, is that 3 (out of like 5) of the antagonistic forces of the novel are all queer. In fact (I am 98% sure) every LGBT character in the entire novel is shady.
1. Sjofn- a lebian, while not being evil per say tricks Finnie into taking her place in a marriage she doesn't want.
2. Broderick and Phobin- Two gay men who turn out to be the evil masterminds behind the plot. Phobin (the apparent dom in this relationship) convinced Broderick to turn on his family and commit treason and murder. (Honestly I can't even go into how weird and fucked up this relationship seemed to be but I think it is really poor representation and ughhhhhh) They are both then killed.
I thought it was eerie that so many of the bad characters were LGBT. I don't think this is on purpose, however accidental homophobia can easily be remedied in the editing process.
ALL in ALL this book was a disappointment. Mostly because the plot and the writing were really interesting and fun. I loved the world Kristen Ashley built. But I couldn't look past how abusive the relationship between Frey and Finnie was. And the homophobia, while again I don't think it was intentional, is a big problem.
I would really like to live in a world were Dominate Men and Controlling asshole abusive men were not interchangeable in fiction.
First of all let me just say, I really wanted to like this book. Really, I did.
When I first started the book I was optimistic. I liked the way the author just jumped into the story. I liked Finnie's attitude. I liked that Finnie was and adventure despite being feminine.
However this novel had one big problem from the very beginning: Frey Drakker.
Normally I am a sucker for a hot, brawny, dominate male. Really. And usually I can separate life from fiction and enjoy those type of characters even when they have questionable moral alignments. But Frey crossed the line. Repeatedly. I understand this character was raised in a very different world and therefor has different set of morals but honestly I don't think that is a good enough excuse for half the shit he did.
His list of fucked up practices include (but are not limited to)
1.Coercing a women into sexual acts even when she makes it clear she is not ready
2. Forcibly binding that woman to his world without telling her
3. Belittling and degrading said woman for having genuine feelings
4. Switching out his wife's birth control without telling her (even though she said in one of their first conversations that she wanted to wait to have children)
7. Longing for the day that his adventurous wife (the quality he apparently loves about her) is pregnant so he can make her stay home and cage her in to "keep her safe"
6. Forcing his wife to abandon her hobbies (for her "protection") when she becomes pregnant, in spite of the fact that she wants to continue.
7. In general making decisions for her and not "allowing" her to do things she wants to do
All of this pretty much makes him despicable in my eyes. However my BIGGEST problem with Frey is how Finnie acts around him. She gives into everything he wants. Even if she initially protests she eventually relents. She forgives every single fucked up thing he ever does. We are led to believe that Finnie is this badass, strong, adventurer, however she shows no agency throughout the entire book. She simply goes along with Frey. It really, really bothered me.
I think novels like this are very, very dangerous. By showing that because Finnie and Frey "love" each other, Finnie can easily forgive everything Frey ever did because he did it out of love... We set a dangerous example to women and men about what a healthy relationship entails. By romanticizing abusive relationships, we help cultivate a culture where that abuse is seen as normal.
My other big problem with this book, and yeah I know some are going to roll their eyes but I am going there, is that 3 (out of like 5) of the antagonistic forces of the novel are all queer. In fact (I am 98% sure) every LGBT character in the entire novel is shady.
1. Sjofn- a lebian, while not being evil per say tricks Finnie into taking her place in a marriage she doesn't want.
2. Broderick and Phobin- Two gay men who turn out to be the evil masterminds behind the plot. Phobin (the apparent dom in this relationship) convinced Broderick to turn on his family and commit treason and murder. (Honestly I can't even go into how weird and fucked up this relationship seemed to be but I think it is really poor representation and ughhhhhh) They are both then killed.
I thought it was eerie that so many of the bad characters were LGBT. I don't think this is on purpose, however accidental homophobia can easily be remedied in the editing process.
ALL in ALL this book was a disappointment. Mostly because the plot and the writing were really interesting and fun. I loved the world Kristen Ashley built. But I couldn't look past how abusive the relationship between Frey and Finnie was. And the homophobia, while again I don't think it was intentional, is a big problem.
I would really like to live in a world were Dominate Men and Controlling asshole abusive men were not interchangeable in fiction.