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A review by em_brebs
More Happy Than Not by Adam Silvera
5.0
I have been putting off reading this book for much longer than I should've. And I didn't even really like the beginning; but then it all turned around. There is a twist, which I didn't figure out, and from there on out it was basically brilliance. It is heartbreaking and terrible and if you are looking for a happy, or even mildly optimistic, book than I would recommend you steer very, very clear of this book. The main character is complex and intriguing and the relationships are complicated and when everything comes together it just works really well and is just so sad. It is really incredibly sad. And really incredibly brilliant. Spectacular debut novel.
This book is about Aaron who has a great girlfriend and a great group of friends and then he meets this guy. And starts to maybe fall for him. Hovering in the background, he is aware of a company, Leteo Institute, which can make his memories disappear (or suppress them, technically.)
SPOILERSSSSSSSS DISCUSSION!!!!!!!!!!
So I totally didn't guess that he had already had the procedure. I had literally no idea. And then I realized. And then I realized why his dad killed himself. And then who Dr. Castle was. And then that Collin was that guy in the comic book store. And it all came together and UGH JUST SO GOOD!
The end is both super hopeful and terribly sad. He is finally able to find happiness in moments that don't immediately seem happy. But, his memory is slowly deteriorating. He will not remember much in the years to come. He won't be able to have a relationship. His life will probably be unhappy. At least now he knows how to find the happiness in the unhappiness, but still. It is not a hopeful existence. It makes me close to tears just thinking about it.
It is really curious to me that we never really know Thomas's sexuality. Is he lying or is Aaron searching for things that were never truly there? And should we just, on principle, accept what Thomas identifies as and not even question it? The dynamic between Aaron and Thomas's possible sexualities is really interesting. Like, how much does Aaron depend on Thomas? How much does Aaron depend on his conception of Thomas?
And, speaking of mysteries, did Thomas and Genevieve hook up? Did they start dating? And like, if so, WTF? Like, let's be real, Aaron cheated on Genevieve an unconscionable amount of times (not that even one time is conscionable, but you know what I mean.) He betrayed her. But, if they started to date too, that also feels like a deep betrayal. I don't know.
So the twist really worked for me. Before I read it, I was like, "WTF is this gay guy? He just magically turns gay over night? That seems super entirely unrealistic. Like, you can realize that you're gay in one moment, but, like, that doesn't seem like an accurate way to portray the general experience." It should have been portrayed, in my opinion, with crushes on guys before and a fairly certain reasoning that girls just were not right (at least, if he was going to identify as gay. Not as bi or pan or heteroflexible etc etc.) So, what I'm saying, is that it was portrayed really, really, well after we understand everything. I was going to fault this book for acting like homosexuality, or any kind of sexuality, is turned on overnight. But, it turns out, that was kind of actually the case here: it took one event to start the unwinding: to bring back all of those old memories and feelings (which, had, in fact, not just appeared magically overnight but had really started with a crush on Brendan and more from years previous.) I thought that this book just had bad writing and plotting, not that it was actually going to come together and make perfect sense and be beautiful. I should've had more trust.
Another thing that I really didn't like at the beginning of the book but that I began to have more appreciation for as the book continued was these games and the Trade Date and stuff like that. It felt inauthentic to me. Like, we get it, these people are close and have made up games. I don't know, it just felt kind of juvenile to me. But then, once we realize where the Trade Date was coming from (i.e. Gen being like, "oh our relationship needs serious help") it gains value. And once the games begin to offer a setting and context for these character interactions, it gains more value (though I'm still not the hugest fan of them.)
One small note about this book and its depiction of being gay. Being gay and having a different gender identity from the one assigned to you at birth are two different things. Like, wanting to play the female character in a video game does not indicate either of them, necessarily, but seems like it would lean towards identifying with the female character (as evidenced by the choice to play as the female character.) This is different from playing the Sims and creating a male character, and then having that male character have relationships with other males.
The violence was so heartbreaking. From the two times that Aaron is a victim of hate crimes (and I love that they say that word in the book. Hate crimes. It makes it realer.) to also his violence towards himself and his father's suicide. It was a perfect amount to communicate the rawness and harshness that gave this book an edge, without being so much that it became gratuitous.
I wish that we had a little bit more guilt, on Aaron's side, about cheating on Gen. It seemed like it was almost skipped over, or made to seem okay because he was protecting himself, and maybe she figured it out with time. But still. Cheating is not okay. Don't cheat. And it's not okay even if you think it leads to a positive outcome. You are destroying someone's trust. I don't think that should ever be brushed over.
This book is murky. My opinions are murky about it. And his relationships are so complicated and the decisions that he makes tend to not be great ones. I feel so, so bad for him.
The four chapters where he's saying goodbye to everyone are really, really good. And heartbreaking and brilliant and poignant. And just so good.
I will have to check out anything that Mr. Silvera comes up with from here on out.
FFFFIIIIINNNNNNN!!!!!!!!
As was stated about ten million times in the review above, this book is brilliant and heartbreaking: 95%
This book is about Aaron who has a great girlfriend and a great group of friends and then he meets this guy. And starts to maybe fall for him. Hovering in the background, he is aware of a company, Leteo Institute, which can make his memories disappear (or suppress them, technically.)
SPOILERSSSSSSSS DISCUSSION!!!!!!!!!!
So I totally didn't guess that he had already had the procedure. I had literally no idea. And then I realized. And then I realized why his dad killed himself. And then who Dr. Castle was. And then that Collin was that guy in the comic book store. And it all came together and UGH JUST SO GOOD!
The end is both super hopeful and terribly sad. He is finally able to find happiness in moments that don't immediately seem happy. But, his memory is slowly deteriorating. He will not remember much in the years to come. He won't be able to have a relationship. His life will probably be unhappy. At least now he knows how to find the happiness in the unhappiness, but still. It is not a hopeful existence. It makes me close to tears just thinking about it.
It is really curious to me that we never really know Thomas's sexuality. Is he lying or is Aaron searching for things that were never truly there? And should we just, on principle, accept what Thomas identifies as and not even question it? The dynamic between Aaron and Thomas's possible sexualities is really interesting. Like, how much does Aaron depend on Thomas? How much does Aaron depend on his conception of Thomas?
And, speaking of mysteries, did Thomas and Genevieve hook up? Did they start dating? And like, if so, WTF? Like, let's be real, Aaron cheated on Genevieve an unconscionable amount of times (not that even one time is conscionable, but you know what I mean.) He betrayed her. But, if they started to date too, that also feels like a deep betrayal. I don't know.
So the twist really worked for me. Before I read it, I was like, "WTF is this gay guy? He just magically turns gay over night? That seems super entirely unrealistic. Like, you can realize that you're gay in one moment, but, like, that doesn't seem like an accurate way to portray the general experience." It should have been portrayed, in my opinion, with crushes on guys before and a fairly certain reasoning that girls just were not right (at least, if he was going to identify as gay. Not as bi or pan or heteroflexible etc etc.) So, what I'm saying, is that it was portrayed really, really, well after we understand everything. I was going to fault this book for acting like homosexuality, or any kind of sexuality, is turned on overnight. But, it turns out, that was kind of actually the case here: it took one event to start the unwinding: to bring back all of those old memories and feelings (which, had, in fact, not just appeared magically overnight but had really started with a crush on Brendan and more from years previous.) I thought that this book just had bad writing and plotting, not that it was actually going to come together and make perfect sense and be beautiful. I should've had more trust.
Another thing that I really didn't like at the beginning of the book but that I began to have more appreciation for as the book continued was these games and the Trade Date and stuff like that. It felt inauthentic to me. Like, we get it, these people are close and have made up games. I don't know, it just felt kind of juvenile to me. But then, once we realize where the Trade Date was coming from (i.e. Gen being like, "oh our relationship needs serious help") it gains value. And once the games begin to offer a setting and context for these character interactions, it gains more value (though I'm still not the hugest fan of them.)
One small note about this book and its depiction of being gay. Being gay and having a different gender identity from the one assigned to you at birth are two different things. Like, wanting to play the female character in a video game does not indicate either of them, necessarily, but seems like it would lean towards identifying with the female character (as evidenced by the choice to play as the female character.) This is different from playing the Sims and creating a male character, and then having that male character have relationships with other males.
The violence was so heartbreaking. From the two times that Aaron is a victim of hate crimes (and I love that they say that word in the book. Hate crimes. It makes it realer.) to also his violence towards himself and his father's suicide. It was a perfect amount to communicate the rawness and harshness that gave this book an edge, without being so much that it became gratuitous.
I wish that we had a little bit more guilt, on Aaron's side, about cheating on Gen. It seemed like it was almost skipped over, or made to seem okay because he was protecting himself, and maybe she figured it out with time. But still. Cheating is not okay. Don't cheat. And it's not okay even if you think it leads to a positive outcome. You are destroying someone's trust. I don't think that should ever be brushed over.
This book is murky. My opinions are murky about it. And his relationships are so complicated and the decisions that he makes tend to not be great ones. I feel so, so bad for him.
The four chapters where he's saying goodbye to everyone are really, really good. And heartbreaking and brilliant and poignant. And just so good.
I will have to check out anything that Mr. Silvera comes up with from here on out.
FFFFIIIIINNNNNNN!!!!!!!!
As was stated about ten million times in the review above, this book is brilliant and heartbreaking: 95%