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A review by rickyschneider
Becoming a Man: Half a Life Story by Kathryn Harrison, Paul Monette
emotional
funny
hopeful
inspiring
reflective
medium-paced
5.0
The best reading experiences often have that invasively intimate feel to them that lets you know it will be significant and formative in a way that seems specific to you. Paul Monette's Becoming a Man was exactly that kind of book for me. The prose felt like the deft work of a master but also like the diary of a close friend. The story pointedly called me out while also graciously letting me in on so much of Monette's intensely personal, complex and raw memories from half a life spent ducking in and out of the closet. His nothing-left-to-lose attitude in writing this memoir makes the writing crackle with unfettered and unbothered honesty. For me, this was the perfect book at the perfect time. It always feels like a small miracle when that happens.
I've always loved Monette's writing whether in fiction or in his poetry and it worked just as well for me here. He is so skillful with a sentence that he somehow comes across as both direct and flowery at the same time. Everything from his word choice to his sentence structure flows effortlessly and conversationally while also feeling carefully concerted and meticulously crafted. His account of growing up gay is unflinching and uncensored. It manages a candid relatability laced with vivid personal detail that simultaneously involve and intrigue the reader. This man has quickly become one of my favorite writers of all time. I can't help but wish that he was more widely read and perhaps that it due to his work not being as readily available as other classic queer authors. Either way, it's a shame that should be corrected so that others like myself could be let in on the secret of this incredible author and poet.
Being a memoir of half of his life, the narrative is a linear account of his childhood up into adulthood and Monette holds nothing back. He lets the reader in on every seedy detail as he recounts the beautiful, the unseemly and the uncomfortable rites of passage that queer youth go through on the journey to finding and loving their true selves. His childhood was particularly engaging to me as he remembers each bewildering revelation and befuddling confusion of adolescence. Coming of age in the fifties, this portion reminded me of one of my favorite films, Stand By Me. Monette is every bit the Gordie complete with a motley cast of complicated and impactful supporting characters deserving of a River Phoenix performance.
The timeliness of this read in my own life was constantly shocking and engrossing. I literally had Roshomon playing on the TV in the background as I read the pages that referenced the Kurosawa classic. A few moths ago I had another thrillingly transformative reading experience in Henry David Thoreau's Walden and Monette repeatedly references his own time with that book in the final pages. I felt a pang of jealous envy as he recounted his reading that classic text in the doorway of the cabin where it is set and lounging nude on Walden pond itself. I'm just grateful I got to live vicariously through him and got the gift of reading Monette's own sort of review of that new favorite of mine. It was an added, exciting treat to see the specifics that he mentioned standing out to him and recognize my own sentiments in his thoughts about Thoreau and all his transcendental idiosyncrasies.
This is an instant classic and new favorite of mine. I have dog-eared and highlighted my used copy to reference and reminisce on for years to come. I look forward to recommending this everyone I know, especially queer young people. Monette incapsulates and artfully illustrates a common experience with uncommon grace and grit. This is why books are important and it is a glorious testament to the power of sharing your story.
I've always loved Monette's writing whether in fiction or in his poetry and it worked just as well for me here. He is so skillful with a sentence that he somehow comes across as both direct and flowery at the same time. Everything from his word choice to his sentence structure flows effortlessly and conversationally while also feeling carefully concerted and meticulously crafted. His account of growing up gay is unflinching and uncensored. It manages a candid relatability laced with vivid personal detail that simultaneously involve and intrigue the reader. This man has quickly become one of my favorite writers of all time. I can't help but wish that he was more widely read and perhaps that it due to his work not being as readily available as other classic queer authors. Either way, it's a shame that should be corrected so that others like myself could be let in on the secret of this incredible author and poet.
Being a memoir of half of his life, the narrative is a linear account of his childhood up into adulthood and Monette holds nothing back. He lets the reader in on every seedy detail as he recounts the beautiful, the unseemly and the uncomfortable rites of passage that queer youth go through on the journey to finding and loving their true selves. His childhood was particularly engaging to me as he remembers each bewildering revelation and befuddling confusion of adolescence. Coming of age in the fifties, this portion reminded me of one of my favorite films, Stand By Me. Monette is every bit the Gordie complete with a motley cast of complicated and impactful supporting characters deserving of a River Phoenix performance.
The timeliness of this read in my own life was constantly shocking and engrossing. I literally had Roshomon playing on the TV in the background as I read the pages that referenced the Kurosawa classic. A few moths ago I had another thrillingly transformative reading experience in Henry David Thoreau's Walden and Monette repeatedly references his own time with that book in the final pages. I felt a pang of jealous envy as he recounted his reading that classic text in the doorway of the cabin where it is set and lounging nude on Walden pond itself. I'm just grateful I got to live vicariously through him and got the gift of reading Monette's own sort of review of that new favorite of mine. It was an added, exciting treat to see the specifics that he mentioned standing out to him and recognize my own sentiments in his thoughts about Thoreau and all his transcendental idiosyncrasies.
This is an instant classic and new favorite of mine. I have dog-eared and highlighted my used copy to reference and reminisce on for years to come. I look forward to recommending this everyone I know, especially queer young people. Monette incapsulates and artfully illustrates a common experience with uncommon grace and grit. This is why books are important and it is a glorious testament to the power of sharing your story.