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A review by ikramxlek
Right Where I Left You by Julian Winters
1.0
DNF @ 55%
This was supposed to be my reconciliation with young adult contemporary but I guess it's unfair to expect it from a book I picked up randomly. I really wanted to get out of my comfort zone with this one and I also wanted to prioritize a new release. I did have low expectations for it though. The beginning of the book, like the first hundred pages, was very solid, I was genuinely enjoying it and I flew through those pages. I was so excited I thought this would be one of the rare times I enjoy this genre. The flaws were apparent from the beginning but, at some point during the story, the bad truly started to outweigh the good for me, to the point where it was unbearable and also a waste of time to try and continue.
I'll start with the good. So, at first, I was totally conquered by Isaac as a main character. I thought he was interesting and somewhat realistic for a teenager and I just wanted to know more about him. I really cared about his relationship with Diego, as best friends and more. They had so many cute scenes together that really warmed my heart. I also really loved the diverse group of characters the book offered, in race, gender and sexuality.
Now, onto the bad. I didn't care for a single character in here. Even the ones I liked at the beginning. They just started getting boring. They either had one personality trait or none at all. The love triangle was very dumb and I did not care for the third party. There was no plot development and no substance to the story. It just felt like we got from one place to another, from one conversation to the next. It was the same conflicts redone and rehashed for several chapters. But most importantly. The dialogue was so fucking cringe. It was trying soooooo hard, like soooooo hard. To be young and cool and unproblematic. It was devoid of soul. The characters were talking like they were on Twitter. Except when people do it on Twitter it's funny. Then there was also the comics nerd aspect of the main character. The nerd trope is a very overdone one. This is not the first book to fail at it. What I mean by nerd trope is when a character's only personality trait is a single hobby they have. And that's it. That's all they talk about. And that was veryyyyyy much the case here. There wasn't a single paragraph, a single line, where you didn't get reminded of how much Isaac likes this one comics series. It was exhausting. Again, all these flaws are linked to the same problem. The book was trying very hard to be relatable to the point where it was cringe. It wasn't even unrealistic. I just don't think it can work in a book without coming off weird.
And what was so sad about this. Is that it didn't need to do all this to be relatable. There were some actual good lines in here. That were very pertinent to the experience of a teenager. There were also some great conversations about queer baiting in media and the capitalization of queer culture during pride month. Like, there was potential. But it fell flat for me because of very stupid dialogue and a lack of plot structure. I also think there are loads of books out there that discuss these exact same themes. But better. And that's why I decided there was no point in continuing.
I'll still write down some of my favorite quotes because, as I said, there was some solid writing in here :
I’m awkward with new people. Most times it’s hard for me to relate or open up to them. There’s no natural flow to our conversations. No easy silence like you can have with a person you’ve known for more than a year. I can’t remember when it started, but the moment I’m introduced to someone, a barrier appears. It prevents them from getting too close. They can’t hurt me, and I’ll never disappoint them.
The thing about coming out is you’re so focused on making sure who you are doesn’t hurt or change your relationship with your loved ones that you never really think about yourself. About your moment. About how wonderful it is to just . . . be.
Some tears aren’t for wounds. Some are for healing.
Something is slowly ending but also beginning.
Sunsets are this well-known secret: soon, everything resets.
Am I the thing holding her back?
You’re not supposed to think that about your parents, right? Like you’re the wall keeping them from their future.
The thing about summers is they start slow and glorious. Everything’s gold and blue in the day, heady and warm at night. The days stretch for what seems like weeks. You can’t walk five feet without smelling the chlorine from a community pool or something cooking on a grill or freshly cut grass. There’s an unnamable magic everywhere.
By mid-July, though, it feels like a fireball racing downhill. All the magic is replaced by a constant countdown: “what was” rather than “what could be.”
August is just a graveyard of the hope early summer gave.
I can’t remember why Diego and I stopped coming to this park. Did we outgrow the swing sets where we met and the looping slide and lying in the grass while the sun washed over us? Did we find new ways to escape the secrets we kept from the rest of the world but not from each other? Or was it just high school and the constant pressure to perform? Continuously having to “act mature” when, really, you’ve barely stepped into this new transition without falling on your face.
No one ever tells you that the what-ifs never go away. They change shape, go from loud to quiet. But they never truly disappear.
This was supposed to be my reconciliation with young adult contemporary but I guess it's unfair to expect it from a book I picked up randomly. I really wanted to get out of my comfort zone with this one and I also wanted to prioritize a new release. I did have low expectations for it though. The beginning of the book, like the first hundred pages, was very solid, I was genuinely enjoying it and I flew through those pages. I was so excited I thought this would be one of the rare times I enjoy this genre. The flaws were apparent from the beginning but, at some point during the story, the bad truly started to outweigh the good for me, to the point where it was unbearable and also a waste of time to try and continue.
I'll start with the good. So, at first, I was totally conquered by Isaac as a main character. I thought he was interesting and somewhat realistic for a teenager and I just wanted to know more about him. I really cared about his relationship with Diego, as best friends and more. They had so many cute scenes together that really warmed my heart. I also really loved the diverse group of characters the book offered, in race, gender and sexuality.
Now, onto the bad. I didn't care for a single character in here. Even the ones I liked at the beginning. They just started getting boring. They either had one personality trait or none at all. The love triangle was very dumb and I did not care for the third party. There was no plot development and no substance to the story. It just felt like we got from one place to another, from one conversation to the next. It was the same conflicts redone and rehashed for several chapters. But most importantly. The dialogue was so fucking cringe. It was trying soooooo hard, like soooooo hard. To be young and cool and unproblematic. It was devoid of soul. The characters were talking like they were on Twitter. Except when people do it on Twitter it's funny. Then there was also the comics nerd aspect of the main character. The nerd trope is a very overdone one. This is not the first book to fail at it. What I mean by nerd trope is when a character's only personality trait is a single hobby they have. And that's it. That's all they talk about. And that was veryyyyyy much the case here. There wasn't a single paragraph, a single line, where you didn't get reminded of how much Isaac likes this one comics series. It was exhausting. Again, all these flaws are linked to the same problem. The book was trying very hard to be relatable to the point where it was cringe. It wasn't even unrealistic. I just don't think it can work in a book without coming off weird.
And what was so sad about this. Is that it didn't need to do all this to be relatable. There were some actual good lines in here. That were very pertinent to the experience of a teenager. There were also some great conversations about queer baiting in media and the capitalization of queer culture during pride month. Like, there was potential. But it fell flat for me because of very stupid dialogue and a lack of plot structure. I also think there are loads of books out there that discuss these exact same themes. But better. And that's why I decided there was no point in continuing.
I'll still write down some of my favorite quotes because, as I said, there was some solid writing in here :
I’m awkward with new people. Most times it’s hard for me to relate or open up to them. There’s no natural flow to our conversations. No easy silence like you can have with a person you’ve known for more than a year. I can’t remember when it started, but the moment I’m introduced to someone, a barrier appears. It prevents them from getting too close. They can’t hurt me, and I’ll never disappoint them.
The thing about coming out is you’re so focused on making sure who you are doesn’t hurt or change your relationship with your loved ones that you never really think about yourself. About your moment. About how wonderful it is to just . . . be.
Some tears aren’t for wounds. Some are for healing.
Something is slowly ending but also beginning.
Sunsets are this well-known secret: soon, everything resets.
Am I the thing holding her back?
You’re not supposed to think that about your parents, right? Like you’re the wall keeping them from their future.
The thing about summers is they start slow and glorious. Everything’s gold and blue in the day, heady and warm at night. The days stretch for what seems like weeks. You can’t walk five feet without smelling the chlorine from a community pool or something cooking on a grill or freshly cut grass. There’s an unnamable magic everywhere.
By mid-July, though, it feels like a fireball racing downhill. All the magic is replaced by a constant countdown: “what was” rather than “what could be.”
August is just a graveyard of the hope early summer gave.
I can’t remember why Diego and I stopped coming to this park. Did we outgrow the swing sets where we met and the looping slide and lying in the grass while the sun washed over us? Did we find new ways to escape the secrets we kept from the rest of the world but not from each other? Or was it just high school and the constant pressure to perform? Continuously having to “act mature” when, really, you’ve barely stepped into this new transition without falling on your face.
No one ever tells you that the what-ifs never go away. They change shape, go from loud to quiet. But they never truly disappear.