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A review by thewildeausten
Holding Her Breath: A Novel by Eimear Ryan
4.0
“Is it weird to demand higher moral standards from the person you love than from yourself?”
As much as I want to claim that the book seemed different and stood apart from all the other women’s fiction (or I suppose you can say chick lits) that I have read, I don’t want to lie. Holding Her Breath is centred around the life of Beth Crowe, an ex-athletic swimmer who has grown up under the shadow of her famous grandfather’s controversial life and death. Beth has to endure the unending questions regarding her grandfather’s suicide and meanwhile find her own identity amidst the crowd.
Eimear’s writing is clear and precise, and there isn’t much left to interpretation. She manages to maintain suspense behind Benjamin’s past using a mixture of misinformation and secrets. Beth, who succumbed to the mental stress she suffered due to her swimming career, tentatively steps back into the waters when she joins Trinity College’s psychology programme. The book starts with Beth starting her new journey as a student and getting to know her new surroundings. As the book progresses, we see Beth coming out of her shell and accepting herself, exploring things that would have scared her before.
As Beth starts working on her strained relationship with swimming, she also develops feelings for a professor in the university: Professor Justin Kelleher. Her first meeting with him portrays his complete obsession with Benjamin’s life; we also come to know that he had tried to extract information from her grandmother Lydia. Despite all this, Beth becomes sexually attracted to him and they start a rather torrid affair. Beth’s character goes through self-realisation, slowly coming to accept herself as she is. She seems to be a kind and sensitive girl, trying her best to integrate herself in the society. However, she has some self-sabotaging tendencies which come forward through her actions and decisions. As the secret of her grandfather’s past reveals itself to her, one can spot how she somehow ended up in the same position as her grandparents, whose actions she had judged harshly, deeming them unacceptable. However, she walks on the same path and comes to sympathise with them as she understands the emotional pain and trauma they must have gone through.
Her relationship with Justin is a prime example of how her decisions are based on her emotional values rather than practical terms. Justin is clear about his relationship status and even attempts to maintain a distance from Beth, meanwhile recognising his attraction towards her. The fact that he was in a committed relationship with someone else was never hidden and it would be unfair to not acknowledge this. Similarly, Beth is completely oblivious of the glaring red flags in Justin’s behaviour, which one can attribute to her immense feelings for him. For example, it is baffling how comfortable Beth was about Justin taking her to an Airbnb that belonged to his girlfriend’s mother.
What I have recognised as a recurring motif in the book is, most surprisingly, adultery in a relationship. Beth’s behaviour and personality shows a contrast in her opinions regarding this issue, which was a part of her life as well as her grandfather’s. Throughout the book, Beth is in a relationship with Justin while being completely aware about his girlfriend. Similarly, she has a seemingly polygamous relationship with her friends from school, Cormac and Marina. All the while, as she gets to know more about her grandparents’ marriage and the possibility of someone else being involved, she immediately jumps on an ethical high horse, condemning them for behaving the same way as her.
Apart from all the romance and drama in Beth’s life, there is a beautiful description of the relationship between a grandmother, mother and daughter. Eimear excellently portrays how the three women find strength and support within each other, portraying a healthy familial environment. Of course, Lydia has her secrets and Beth doesn’t seem very close to her mother. But the book definitely sends the message that family always stays with you, in happiness and in distress. Beth’s relationship with her father isn’t really explored much in the book, but it’s clear that there are no strains in that area.
Coming back to the first sentence of this review, the book doesn’t stand out as different from others in its genre. I wish Eimear had not chosen the typical ‘girl protagonist’ character trope who claims to be ‘not like other girls’ or the character of Sadie, who is the typical trusted roommate with an opposing personality. While these character tropes are very common in women’s fiction, it would have been refreshing to see a character who accepts her femininity and moves forward in her life.
I would say that the book can prove to be an excellent suggestion for those who want to perpetuate the habit of reading, or those who are struggling to get back to it. Because of its steady pace and levelled narration, very little effort is required from the readers in order to understand the plot and follow the characters. Moreover, the characters themselves are relatable. What I admire about Beth’s writing is that she does not seem to pass any judgment about any of the characters. She hasn’t characterised them into ‘good’ or ‘bad’, leaving it to the readers to sympathise and relate with anyone. You might feel bad for Beth’s situation, or you might also feel that Justin was wronged. The book, in true words, is a contemporary work.
While these characteristics make the reading of the book smooth and quick, I was left wishing for more. Benjamin’s past is revealed, and the twist is certainly unexpected, but I wish there was more content regarding this. Also, the Beth and Justin issue felt unresolved to me. To conclude, I admire the fact that Eimear Ryan managed to bring forward an interesting story as her debut novel. I certainly look forward to and am excited to see what else she would bring to the table and would like to read more from her.
As much as I want to claim that the book seemed different and stood apart from all the other women’s fiction (or I suppose you can say chick lits) that I have read, I don’t want to lie. Holding Her Breath is centred around the life of Beth Crowe, an ex-athletic swimmer who has grown up under the shadow of her famous grandfather’s controversial life and death. Beth has to endure the unending questions regarding her grandfather’s suicide and meanwhile find her own identity amidst the crowd.
Eimear’s writing is clear and precise, and there isn’t much left to interpretation. She manages to maintain suspense behind Benjamin’s past using a mixture of misinformation and secrets. Beth, who succumbed to the mental stress she suffered due to her swimming career, tentatively steps back into the waters when she joins Trinity College’s psychology programme. The book starts with Beth starting her new journey as a student and getting to know her new surroundings. As the book progresses, we see Beth coming out of her shell and accepting herself, exploring things that would have scared her before.
As Beth starts working on her strained relationship with swimming, she also develops feelings for a professor in the university: Professor Justin Kelleher. Her first meeting with him portrays his complete obsession with Benjamin’s life; we also come to know that he had tried to extract information from her grandmother Lydia. Despite all this, Beth becomes sexually attracted to him and they start a rather torrid affair. Beth’s character goes through self-realisation, slowly coming to accept herself as she is. She seems to be a kind and sensitive girl, trying her best to integrate herself in the society. However, she has some self-sabotaging tendencies which come forward through her actions and decisions. As the secret of her grandfather’s past reveals itself to her, one can spot how she somehow ended up in the same position as her grandparents, whose actions she had judged harshly, deeming them unacceptable. However, she walks on the same path and comes to sympathise with them as she understands the emotional pain and trauma they must have gone through.
Her relationship with Justin is a prime example of how her decisions are based on her emotional values rather than practical terms. Justin is clear about his relationship status and even attempts to maintain a distance from Beth, meanwhile recognising his attraction towards her. The fact that he was in a committed relationship with someone else was never hidden and it would be unfair to not acknowledge this. Similarly, Beth is completely oblivious of the glaring red flags in Justin’s behaviour, which one can attribute to her immense feelings for him. For example, it is baffling how comfortable Beth was about Justin taking her to an Airbnb that belonged to his girlfriend’s mother.
What I have recognised as a recurring motif in the book is, most surprisingly, adultery in a relationship. Beth’s behaviour and personality shows a contrast in her opinions regarding this issue, which was a part of her life as well as her grandfather’s. Throughout the book, Beth is in a relationship with Justin while being completely aware about his girlfriend. Similarly, she has a seemingly polygamous relationship with her friends from school, Cormac and Marina. All the while, as she gets to know more about her grandparents’ marriage and the possibility of someone else being involved, she immediately jumps on an ethical high horse, condemning them for behaving the same way as her.
Apart from all the romance and drama in Beth’s life, there is a beautiful description of the relationship between a grandmother, mother and daughter. Eimear excellently portrays how the three women find strength and support within each other, portraying a healthy familial environment. Of course, Lydia has her secrets and Beth doesn’t seem very close to her mother. But the book definitely sends the message that family always stays with you, in happiness and in distress. Beth’s relationship with her father isn’t really explored much in the book, but it’s clear that there are no strains in that area.
Coming back to the first sentence of this review, the book doesn’t stand out as different from others in its genre. I wish Eimear had not chosen the typical ‘girl protagonist’ character trope who claims to be ‘not like other girls’ or the character of Sadie, who is the typical trusted roommate with an opposing personality. While these character tropes are very common in women’s fiction, it would have been refreshing to see a character who accepts her femininity and moves forward in her life.
I would say that the book can prove to be an excellent suggestion for those who want to perpetuate the habit of reading, or those who are struggling to get back to it. Because of its steady pace and levelled narration, very little effort is required from the readers in order to understand the plot and follow the characters. Moreover, the characters themselves are relatable. What I admire about Beth’s writing is that she does not seem to pass any judgment about any of the characters. She hasn’t characterised them into ‘good’ or ‘bad’, leaving it to the readers to sympathise and relate with anyone. You might feel bad for Beth’s situation, or you might also feel that Justin was wronged. The book, in true words, is a contemporary work.
While these characteristics make the reading of the book smooth and quick, I was left wishing for more. Benjamin’s past is revealed, and the twist is certainly unexpected, but I wish there was more content regarding this. Also, the Beth and Justin issue felt unresolved to me. To conclude, I admire the fact that Eimear Ryan managed to bring forward an interesting story as her debut novel. I certainly look forward to and am excited to see what else she would bring to the table and would like to read more from her.