A review by cinnamonly
The Merchant of Death by D.J. MacHale

adventurous slow-paced

• Plot- or character-driven? Plot
• Strong character development? No
• Loveable characters? No
• Diverse cast of characters? Yes
• Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

1.5

I read and REGRETTED THIS. If I crashed on a desert island with only this book to keep me sane, I'd still chuck it into the sea. I only finished it by setting it to 2.6x speed. Why does everyone like it. Bobby is INSUFFERABLE. He spends six HOURS of the book whining about how little he wants the call to adventure. I hope he is brutally murdered in a later book. He is the absolute worst. I have never in my life met a worse protagonist. This was literally unbearable.

Edit: JUST TO EMPHASIZE HOW BAD THIS WAS, I literally meant to write this scathing but funny review of it, but I was rendered SO FURIOUS at how AWFUL BOBBY IS IN EVERY POSSIBLE WAY that I just furiously wanted the review to be over. I came back to add a more coherent review but I CAN'T HE IS JUST AWFUL.