A review by lezreadalot
If You Dare by Sandy Lowe

3.0

“It’s not the struggle that makes it hot. It’s the surrender. It’s being the one you surrender to.”

I think we can safely put this one down as not for everyone; it could have very easily been not for me. But except for one major thing that stymied my enjoyment, I fairly enjoyed this book, Sandy Lowe's writing style, the conversations that her characters had, and their chemistry.  

The one major thing actually isn't the kink. I'm always down for d/s and power play, and while there was some consensual non-consent that got a bit too intense for me, I actually really appreciated all the conversations that were had about kinky lifestyles, and getting to know and accept yourself enough to confront and ask for what you want. There is a fair amount of sex in this book, but a lot of it is also just talking about sex; the characters unpacking their trauma, the characters negotiating with each other, the characters getting to know each other. The talking and openness was really refreshing. Lauren and Emma don't magically understand one another right off the bat, or magically click together, and I like that the book showed that they had to get better at communication for their relationship to work. Their chemistry was really intense; an absolute delight. (Also Emma's had a crush on Lauren since high school, and I'm a slut for pining.) I'm also a huge fan of the writing style.  It was really fast and snappy and clever and insightful in a lot of ways, and made the reading experience go by really quickly. Other than a few jokes here and there that I didn't really enjoy, I thought it was excellent, and I'll readily read from this author again.  

Also I love this cover! It's so swoony. 

The one thing that tanked my enjoyment was the pacing. It was insta-love city over here. Sometimes insta-love is written in a way that I don't mind or I enjoy. Sometimes it's just a thing that I accept about a book. But here it was so frustrating because I really think that without that element, this would just flat out to be a better book. I said above that these characters don't instantly understand each other; they misconstrue each other's feelings and they're not 100 percent on the same page all of the time. I liked that, it's natural for the beginning of a relationship. (And I liked the fact that the misunderstandings didn't go on for too long; they worked to resolve them.) But for those same characters to be declaring undying love for each other a very short time later seems so very silly and unbelievable. The book takes place between Christmas and New Year's Eve, if you want to know just how insta-love we're talking. Yes, they were acquainted in high school, but still! 

The important themes in this book were exploring yourself, being comfortable with yourself and your desires, confronting uncomfortable experiences in your past and how they may (or may not!) inform how you are as a person today. There were meaningful character arcs. The characters had great chemistry. But they did not need to declare love. This would have worked so much better as an HFN, with hints towards how they could fall in love in the future. Tack on an epilogue one year later, if you really needed to. Trying to pigeonhole this into an HEA just made the story suffer, in my opinion.  

I really wanted to like this one more, but I still think overall it's a good book. You'll enjoy it if you like kink and don't mind insta-love. I'd love to read more from Lowe in the future, especially if it's better paced/more concentrated on the journey of the relationship. 

Content warnings: 
Spoilerconsensual non-consent via roleplay/fantasy, slut-shaming, kink-shaming.


☆ Review copy provided via NetGalley.