A review by annamercado19
The Survivor Wants To Die At The End (B&N Exclusive Edition) by Adam Silvera

challenging dark emotional hopeful reflective sad medium-paced
  • Plot- or character-driven? Character
  • Strong character development? It's complicated
  • Loveable characters? Yes
  • Diverse cast of characters? Yes
  • Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

4.5

I love this series and the way the author handles taboo/difficult topics. Just like the fictional Death-Cast has helped so many live each day to the fullest, so too have these books helped me realize what it is to live each day.

That being said this one was harder to read than the other two, for reasons addressed in the author's content warning at the beginning of the book. Please read it and take it seriously! Spoiler for relating to a character and topics mentioned in content warning.
As someone who experienced heavy suicidal ideation since childhood, I was not prepared for just how much I would relate to Paz. The complete hopelessness and despair for the future, grieving the person I could have been without feeling the way I did, the way self-harm becomes a crutch... Way too familiar. I found my way out of the darkness with support from my family, my friends, an amazing therapist, medication, and my wonderful partner who I met not long after my Almost-End-Day. And even though I chose to keep living almost 3 years ago, Paz resonated so strongly with me that I needed a little break from reading. But that is part of the strength of his character. Paz is not alone and neither am I and neither are untold others reading his story and relating to it.
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