A review by readundancies
Mary: An Awakening of Terror by Nat Cassidy

dark mysterious tense slow-paced
  • Plot- or character-driven? A mix
  • Strong character development? Yes
  • Loveable characters? Yes
  • Diverse cast of characters? No
  • Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

5.0

So at one point this year I declared that The Year of 2022 was my Year of Sci-Fi. 

Guess what? 

I lied. 

I lied unconscionably. 

Because Our Year of 2022 was not a sci-fi renaissance for me. 

No, it was the Year I Discovered Horror and Unwittingly Fell For It, Hook-Line-and-Sinker. 

And this book? 

This book just kicked things up a notch further because I thought it was BRILLIANT. 

To start off, it reminded me a bit of Oh Honey by Emily R. Austin, but I’m not sure I can articulate why. Perhaps it’s the neurotic tone so rooted in both? Alongside the female perspective, it was giving off strong madwoman trope, which I’m starting to think is a trope that I’m not only inclined towards but subconsciously cannot get enough of. 

There’s also something to be said for the narrative voice of this novel; it’s got the somewhat macabre nature of inside thoughts, the dark paths our minds sometimes tread, the offbeat threads our brains tend to follow into thickets of disturbing topics and unconventionally distressing scenes that are hidden beneath the dark and sinister depths of humanity. 

And then you’re suddenly welcomed to an incredibly self-aware unreliable narrator: Mary. 

She’s fucking great. 

You can’t help feel for the tragic MC. She’s not exactly likeable, but she’s by no means a paragon of charm either. She’s incredibly flawed and broken and so hollow that she cannot help but try and fill the empty parts of her soul with other people. 

The more the I got into this novel and the worldbuilding and the characters, the more strange and fucked up the plot became and the more I fell helplessly in love with how dark and macabre and straight up filthy some of the plot choices were. This was a culmination of so many little things doing it right. 

And truly, there are so many great things I could talk about this book. Like, it took less than 300 pages for me to come to the conclusion that I needed to own a physical copy. Because every time I got to a new part, I found myself exclaiming aloud about how excited I was to continue. The way that Cassidy served us as readers the plot he has constructed was nothing short of brilliant in how captivating it all was. 

I savoured this read because I could put this book down without fear that I wouldn’t want to ever pick it up again. I was always thoroughly engaged when I picked it back up because the characters that surrounded Mary were larger than life and Mary herself was so compelling. I liked her incredibly too much for the flawed person she was and the one she harboured, but it was in spite of myself. I couldn’t not be completely hooked by her duplicitous nature. 

Also, the cover is genuinely one my favourite things. It’s such a vibe and I can’t imagine anything better than what David Palumbo and Esther S. Kim combined to create. 

The Afterword in which Nat Cassidy takes the time to explain why he as a cisgendered male felt he needed to tell this story really sold this story for me. I thought it was fantastic and one of the best Afterwords I’ve ever read. Not that I go around rating them, but like, it was incredibly honest with the right amount of righteousness and it resonated with me by the end in a way that I’ve not come across before. It solidified the 5-star vibe I was feeling and it has no business being so impactful when it doesn’t affect the plot of the story at all. 

And that ending. I could not envision an ending that ties up the loose ends so tightly. Poor Nancy and the perpetual blaming of innocent women who are simply in the wrong place at the wrong time. It was sickening and disgusting and made my blood boil in such righteous rage because of how alike reality it ended up being. There were so many harsh truths stated throughout this novel and they hit different because nothing changes in the end. A lady is still at the root of a murderer’s motives, Mary is as invisible as she’s ever been and the little blurbs from FBI Agent Peter Arliss’ true crime account of the Arroyo Easter Massacre really come to a head. The parallels of a history doomed to repeat itself just with different players on a different day were infuriating but also so satisfying to get to experience as a reader. 

This was fantastic, and I cannot say it enough. 

If you’re looking for a reason to pick this up, consider this your reason. 
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