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A review by leviofmichigan
Unfollow: A Journey from Hatred to Hope by Megan Phelps-Roper
challenging
emotional
hopeful
informative
reflective
sad
tense
medium-paced
5.0
Best book I read in 2020.
**Update: Read for second time.**
[Content warning: mention of Hell]
This second time reading, I decided to listen to the book, since the author reads it herself. I teared up during all the same portions, and once again felt so much in common with her journey out of conservative extremism and away from her family.
My family didn't protest military funerals or shout proclamations of the Almighty's feelings regarding LGBTQ people, but at the end of the day, my family's beliefs are frighteningly similar. They, too, hold to many tenets of Calvinism, and believe it to be an act of love to inform someone of their eternal destiny in Hell, despite also believing that G-d predestines some to Heaven, and the vast majority of humanity, to the lake of fire. They also rely deeply on the convictions of their heart, while judging secular people or folks of other religions for doing the same. "The heart is deceitful and desperately wicked," they'll say. Before explaining the "the Spirit within them" has driven them to make a decision or believe a certain thing.
Every parent who has condemned their child for being queer, or trans, or not Christian enough needs to read this book. And this book will be a balm to those who have been shut out or sent away by conservative parents.
Toward the end, Phelps-Roper makes the point that a mindset of "these people don't have anything to teach us," can be found in many worldviews, including liberal ones. In this way, the book teaches valuable lessons in not only leaving conservative faith, but being careful not to harden too much to the things we've left or the ideas we are critical of. She is the best example of tolerance that I can think of today, and, given the history of WBC, it's weird to write that.
Anyway, I loved this book so much I read it twice, so if you haven't yet read it, you really must.
**Update: Read for second time.**
[Content warning: mention of Hell]
This second time reading, I decided to listen to the book, since the author reads it herself. I teared up during all the same portions, and once again felt so much in common with her journey out of conservative extremism and away from her family.
My family didn't protest military funerals or shout proclamations of the Almighty's feelings regarding LGBTQ people, but at the end of the day, my family's beliefs are frighteningly similar. They, too, hold to many tenets of Calvinism, and believe it to be an act of love to inform someone of their eternal destiny in Hell, despite also believing that G-d predestines some to Heaven, and the vast majority of humanity, to the lake of fire. They also rely deeply on the convictions of their heart, while judging secular people or folks of other religions for doing the same. "The heart is deceitful and desperately wicked," they'll say. Before explaining the "the Spirit within them" has driven them to make a decision or believe a certain thing.
Every parent who has condemned their child for being queer, or trans, or not Christian enough needs to read this book. And this book will be a balm to those who have been shut out or sent away by conservative parents.
Toward the end, Phelps-Roper makes the point that a mindset of "these people don't have anything to teach us," can be found in many worldviews, including liberal ones. In this way, the book teaches valuable lessons in not only leaving conservative faith, but being careful not to harden too much to the things we've left or the ideas we are critical of. She is the best example of tolerance that I can think of today, and, given the history of WBC, it's weird to write that.
Anyway, I loved this book so much I read it twice, so if you haven't yet read it, you really must.