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innamorare 's review for:
Breathe In, Bleed Out
by Brian McAuley
Brian McAuley’s latest stab at the slasher genre, a book that’s like a horror movie you’d watch at 2 a.m. with a bowl of slightly stale popcorn. It’s got blood, guts, and a remote healing retreat that’s about as relaxing as a dentist appointment with a dull drill. Its just not the kind of thing that’ll haunt my dreams or make me double-check the locks.
The setup’s got that Midsommar vibe, which the blurbs lean into hard, promising a “blood-soaked thriller” where wellness gets a body count. Our heroine, Hannah, is running from her past—classic slasher protagonist move—and lands at this desert retreat that’s supposed to fix her soul but mostly just fixes her as a target for a machete-wielding nutcase. The vibe’s eerie, the stakes are high, and the body count’s higher. Sounds like a party, right? Well, kinda.
Here’s the good: McAuley knows how to write a slasher that feels like you’re watching a grainy VHS horror flick from the ‘80s. The kills are less “boring stab” and more “whoa, that’s a new way to use a yoga mat.” The pacing’s fast, too, like a car chase where nobody’s wearing a seatbelt. You’re flipping pages, waiting for the next poor sap to bite it.
But here’s where it stumbles, and I’m not just talking about the characters tripping over their own bad decisions. The cast feels like they were plucked from a slasher trope vending machine: the troubled lead, the creepy guru, the snarky sidekick who’s too cool to live past page 100. I wanted to care about Hannah, but she’s so busy running from her vague, tragic backstory that I never got a real grip on who she is. Like, girl, give me something to root for.
The retreat setting is a highlight, though. McAuley paints this dusty, culty compound with enough dread to make you swear off wellness retreats forever. I could practically smell the sage smudging and hear the wind chimes clanging ominously. But the plot twists? Meh. They’re less “mind blown” and more “oh, I saw that coming from page five.” It’s like the book winks at you, thinking it’s pulled a fast one, but you’re already checking your watch.
I had fun, don’t get me wrong. It’s a bloody, messy romp that keeps you guessing who’s next on the chopping block. But it’s not breaking new ground. It’s like ordering a burger and getting exactly what you expected. If you’re a slasher fan who wants a quick, gory read to pair with a cheap beer, this’ll do the trick. Just don’t expect it to reinvent the wheel—or the pickaxe.