A review by linathebookaddict
Finding North by Carmen Jenner

5.0

ARC kindly provided by the author in exchange for an honest review.
Raw. Heart-breaking. realistic and honest.
This book broke my heart. It showed so honestly the hardships homosexual people go through just to exist in a world that treats them like a disease. I was witness to extreme homophobia that purely put me off as I read the book. It was difficult to see, through the book, how cruel people can be.

Will Tanner has known his sexual identity since he was a teenager. He tried to hide it, but he can no longer deny it when his best friend North calls him out on it. North & Will have been very close friends. They share everything, but their relationship is forever altered when North decides to experiment with Will. But Will's feelings for North aren't just a game to him.
Their secret and very brief affair destroyed their friendship. North's fear of his true feelings clashed with Will's total honesty and so, they broke each others' hearts.

They fall apart. They've had no actual contact for twelve years.

North was my childhood. My first love. But he's nothing to me now. We're nothing. We stopped freefalling, and now we're standing still.






When North decides to push himself back into Will's life, he will realize that Will isn't as he once as. He is a man who is not afraid to admit who he is. He is a guy who doesn't fear what others think of him. He is a person who allows others to see him for what he really is and he doesn't make excuses for being who he is.
North is the exact opposite. He fears the town's gossip. He fears being labelled as gay. He doesn't want anyone to know that deep down Will is what he wants. Will's lifestyle terrifies him and so, he hides behind a totally weak relationship with a woman while giving Will total whiplash with his behavior.

North is heartbreak. North is a mindfuck. North has been my whole world. He was no good for me then, and he's still no good for me. I know that and yet I've never wanted anything more.




...because when he looks at me he doesn't see a man who loves him-he sees a man who has the potential to destroy the facade he has so carefully built. Instead of a feature, he sees his ruin. ~Will


Will their tremulous relationship ever evolve?
What I liked about this book is that it didn't waste itself on details about their past and North's traumatic childhood. I loved how the author put us inside the heads of the two heroes and showed us, instead of telling us, what had been imprinted on them by their families. We were witnesses of North's difficult childhood through the thoughts of the man he is now.
I loved Mr. Tanner's easygoing behavior and support towards his son. It was a reflection of Will's confidence and bravery. It made it easy to udnerstand how Will was able to embrace his identity and live his life instead of simply existing as a minority in the town of Red Maine.
I despised North's father and the cloud of fear that his son was constantly forced to bathe in. North was bullied into staying away from his only true friend and love. It was beaten into him. I found his way of ridding himself of all that prejudice utterly realistic and honest. North proved himself to me as the story unfolded.
The secondary characters were fantastic! I loved Josh, Will's friend. He helped a lot in my opinion.
This was the best M/M romance I've read this year so far! I simply inhaled the book. If you love the genre, please read this.

★★★5 Stars from me★★★