bingbongbeepbeep 's review for:

How We Fall Apart by Katie Zhao

4.0

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I felt called out since I resonated a lot with the theme of perfectionism. As an Asian American, these words constantly ring in my ears and are more familiar than anything else--"study, work hard, and get good grades". Successfully achieving what the mantra hailed were the only times my mom or anyone one else recognized my efforts. Throughout the reading I felt all the uneasiness, rage, and helplessness in the pit of my stomach because I too faced those harsh scenarios when parents or society ignored my existence. I couldn't help but empathize with the baggage that weighed on the characters. It made me want to tell them that the freedom they sought out for is something that does not go away after high school, college, or even well into your career. Ironically enough, I also quite literally competed with a Jamie during my undergraduate years. Everything I did, she was always ten steps ahead and remarkably better. Even now nearing our thirties, she continues to flaunt an alternate polished version of myself. The writing made me reflect, what even is it that I want? To continue the doctorate path with the perks of high merit and guaranteed success or to simply travel and explore the world without having a goal in sight? How could I live so freely after working so hard academically my entire life? Its mentally exhausting. Despite the reality the reading reminded me of, I am eager to know what happens next. It can't possibly be the end.