nordstina 's review for:

Things in Nature Merely Grow by Yiyun Li

4.25

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Yiyun Li's memoir Things in Nature Merely Grow is an incredibly moving reflection on the loss of her younger son James by suicide. She previously explored the loss of a son by suicide in her novel Where Reasons End, which she wrote after the death of her older son Vincent by suicide. To lose both of your children that way is unimaginable. This memoir is of course deeply interior. She writes "I have decided to write this book, starting with a single established fact: I am in an abyss." She describes the radical acceptance she is incorporating in the aftermath of James' death. She also looks back on Vincent's death and compared the similarities and differences between her sons. She writes "Vincent lived through his feelings, deep, intense, and overwhelming feelings, and he dies from his feelings." While "James thought hard: deeply, philosophically, and privately. He died from thinking." She is introspective about her intuitions as a mother. I appreciated her reflection on learning to swim as an adult- those learning in childhood tend to swim unthinkingly, and she extrapolates for some living is a natural process, which she believes has never been true for her or her sons. Some breathtakingly sad and resonant words from Li, and if a reader is in a good headspace to read about this topic matter, I would very much recommend this one. 

Thank you to Farrar, Straus and Giroux via NetGalley for the advance reader copy in exchange for honest review.