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A review by 360minerstone
I'm Glad My Mom Died by Jennette McCurdy
challenging
dark
emotional
sad
tense
fast-paced
5.0
Wow.
I was not a Nickelodeon kid. I didn't know of the existence of this show or her until well after it had stopped airing.
When this book came out, everyone was reading it. It was very well received. I didn't because I had no interest. But bingo calls for a memoir from someone you've never heard of, so I decided to give it a shot. Though I finished and rated the book last night, I felt like I had more to say, so I slept on it. I have more to say
I am a different person now.
The writing was clear, which kept me engaged and engrossed in her story. She begins the story from age 6, and though her writing wasn't in the voice of a six-year-old, it does portray how she saw her mother at that time, and the audience is able to see what she can't comprehend yet - just because her mother survived cancer doesn't mean that she can treat her child like that. As the story goes on and she ages, we see how the relationship with her mother, and Jennette's perception of her mother, changes.
I listened to the audiobook, which Jennette herself narrated. I'm glad I did. There were moments where I could hear her voice crack or a deep breath when recalling certain memories, which made me understand her situation even more - all these years later, she's still struggling to say it. The audiobook wasn't that long, so I was able to read it in a day.
I was not a Nickelodeon kid. I didn't know of the existence of this show or her until well after it had stopped airing.
When this book came out, everyone was reading it. It was very well received. I didn't because I had no interest. But bingo calls for a memoir from someone you've never heard of, so I decided to give it a shot. Though I finished and rated the book last night, I felt like I had more to say, so I slept on it. I have more to say
I am a different person now.
The writing was clear, which kept me engaged and engrossed in her story. She begins the story from age 6, and though her writing wasn't in the voice of a six-year-old, it does portray how she saw her mother at that time, and the audience is able to see what she can't comprehend yet - just because her mother survived cancer doesn't mean that she can treat her child like that. As the story goes on and she ages, we see how the relationship with her mother, and Jennette's perception of her mother, changes.
I listened to the audiobook, which Jennette herself narrated. I'm glad I did. There were moments where I could hear her voice crack or a deep breath when recalling certain memories, which made me understand her situation even more - all these years later, she's still struggling to say it. The audiobook wasn't that long, so I was able to read it in a day.
I wouldn't say I enjoyed this or had a good time reading it. There were so many times I felt sick to my stomach and winced when she was describing what her mother put her (and her brothers) through, how she treated her, and how she fostered and encouraged a very severe eating disorder that continued after her death. In the prologue of the book, Jennette's mother is in a coma, and her three older brothers have each said something they hope she will hear and that will get her to wake up. When it's her turn, Jennette wants to be alone with her mother. Jennette says,
I smile. I'm about to bring the big guns. Forget weddings, forget moving home. I've got something more important to offer. Something I'm sure Mom cares about more than anything.
"Mommy, I am. . .so skinny right now. I'm finally down to 89 pounds."
I'm in the ICU with my dying mother, and the thing that I'm sure will get her to wake up is the fact that, in the days since mom's been hospitalized, my fear and sadness have morphed into the perfect anorexia motivation cocktail and, finally, I have achieved mom's current goal weight for me. 89 pounds.
That made me cry. The fact that, in her early twenties, she feels like that will make her mom wake up was very telling to me. When she began the main story, I already despised her mother.
All in all, while I didn't enjoy reading this, the way she told her story kept me invested in it.
Content Warnings
Graphic: Alcoholism, Body shaming, Cancer, Child abuse, Cursing, Drug abuse, Eating disorder, Emotional abuse, Mental illness, Panic attacks/disorders, Terminal illness, Toxic relationship, Blood, Vomit, Grief, Death of parent, and Gaslighting
Minor: Infidelity and Schizophrenia/Psychosis