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A review by shereadsceaselessly
The Kiss Quotient by Helen Hoang
3.0
I liked the story of [b:The Kiss Quotient|36199084|The Kiss Quotient|Helen Hoang|https://images.gr-assets.com/books/1527983633s/36199084.jpg|57828311] well enough, but I wish someone had mentioned to me that this was basically soft porn posing as a romance novel. There was so much sexy time in here, it crowded out the entirely implausible, but fairly cute and formulaic, story about a painfully shy and awkward young woman named Stella, who falls for Michael, the dashing escort she's hired to teach her how to become a skilled lover.
I started out liking this predictable little love story, and may have loved it, if there were more of it. But disappointingly, this story existed for the sex, and the plot line was just there to loosely tie together Stella and Michael's intimacy training sessions. It got boring, repetitive, and entirely unrealistic.
Speaking of unrealistic, remember how I mentioned Stella is shy? Well, she's spectrum shy and rigid, which is a level I totally get. So how could someone like Stella who freaks at the idea of eating out of a microwaved plastic container or overlooking any step in her hygiene routine, be okay with having constant sweaty and invasive sex with a man who HAS SEX WITH OTHER WOMEN AS HIS JOB? She spends forever washing out her mouth after one creep kisses her, once, but an escort who's been with hundreds of women puts his tongue all over and inside her, and this doesn't even inspire a shower?
Why didn't Stella insist upon going through every line in a clean bill of sexual health for Michael first? That should have been a chapter unto itself. She's great with details, and this is one that should have been vital to her very being.
To summarize: too much sex, not enough story, and totally unrealistic in very basic ways. I think this is why I don't read much romance or chick-lit, because I'm scared it will all be frustrating like this.
I started out liking this predictable little love story, and may have loved it, if there were more of it. But disappointingly, this story existed for the sex, and the plot line was just there to loosely tie together Stella and Michael's intimacy training sessions. It got boring, repetitive, and entirely unrealistic.
Speaking of unrealistic, remember how I mentioned Stella is shy? Well, she's spectrum shy and rigid, which is a level I totally get. So how could someone like Stella who freaks at the idea of eating out of a microwaved plastic container or overlooking any step in her hygiene routine, be okay with having constant sweaty and invasive sex with a man who HAS SEX WITH OTHER WOMEN AS HIS JOB? She spends forever washing out her mouth after one creep kisses her, once, but an escort who's been with hundreds of women puts his tongue all over and inside her, and this doesn't even inspire a shower?
Why didn't Stella insist upon going through every line in a clean bill of sexual health for Michael first? That should have been a chapter unto itself. She's great with details, and this is one that should have been vital to her very being.
To summarize: too much sex, not enough story, and totally unrealistic in very basic ways. I think this is why I don't read much romance or chick-lit, because I'm scared it will all be frustrating like this.