A review by faysieh
Little Bandaged Days by Kyra Wilder

4.0

Let me start by saying that in many ways this book deserves 5 stars because it is an extremely well written and deeply disturbing account of one mother's inexorable slide into madness. It is like nothing I have ever read before.
The reason I only awarded the book 4 stars is for two reasons. Firstly, I think that this is a book that will not attract universal appeal and secondly because I was so distraught reading Little Bandaged Days that it was hardly an enjoyable experience. We don't always read for pleasure, and a book is more likely to have a lasting impact if the contents allow the reader to reflect upon their experiences or own belief system, but personally I have far too vivid an imagination not to have been scared by what I read.
Apparently, (reading the blurb), the mother's name is Erika but I don't once remember reading this detail. What I do remember is that the narrator's family have no names other than the initial letters prescribed to them. M is the husband and father, E the very young girl and B the baby. This in itself is original, perfectly fitting for the story, and adds to the alarming sense of losing one's mind. It speaks of being detached and lost in a crowded room. It perpetuates the loneliness and the panic that had me gulping for air.
Our unknown mother has moved to Switzerland for M to spend long, long hours, nights and days and weeks away in some high flying job whilst she is stuck in a small apartment looking after the two children and struggling to retain a sense of identity beyond the person who feeds, cooks, cleans, plays, entertains, nurses and worries about being good enough.
The pressure builds and the stream of internal thought becomes a frightening torrent, leaving me breathless and anxious and altogether horrified. There are days and times when she seems OK, but then there are increasing episodes of obsessive compulsive behaviour and paranoia, psychosis and self-harm.
I am not even sure if I understood all of the book. Was Nell real, or part of her? The sections in italics refer to a time and place that seems brutal and draconian, a desolate place of punishment designed to masquerade as treatment. So many hints of a criminal case and yet the ending, just as brutal, leads nowhere. It was as if I had fallen into an emotional abyss with no way back to my fellow humans.
This novel is not for the faint-hearted or emotionally fragile. It is intense, relentless and a beautiful-but-terrifying exploration of what happens when reality blurs to the extent that it disappears.
An exceptional achievement by the author but a read I would find hard to pick up again.
Thank to Kyra Wilder, the publisher and Netgalley for the opportunity to read this book ahead of publication in exchange for an honest review.