A review by nyquillll
How to Kiss Your Best Friend by Jenny Proctor

adventurous emotional hopeful lighthearted slow-paced

• Plot- or character-driven? A mix
• Strong character development? It's complicated
• Loveable characters? It's complicated
• Diverse cast of characters? No
• Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

2.75

Honestly, I thought this book was going to be a fluffy easy read, but it was kind of boring. I think I'm not really made for slow burns, and this book was a burn right up until the last 1-2 chapters. I did like how the book tried to portray a genuine friendship that developed into a love story (first one-sided), and from both POVs. It wasn't a standout, but it wasn't horrible. 

I did like reading about the water rafting and seeing how passionate the MMC was about his job, his family, and about what he wanted from his future. It's tough to have an unrequited love, and I'm glad things worked out (as we knew they would, a romance novel, duh haha), but the ending felt kind of anticlimactic when they finally confessed their feelings to one another. Also, there were multiple points in the story where the FMC couldn't get her life together and was having the same round of internal monologue with no real growth or challenge to look inward, and I was frustrated with her a lot. 

That said, I did like when the book touched on strained relationships between a parent and a child, being a child of divorce and the impact of how it can show up in romantic relationships, working through how platonic versus romantic love might feel, the dynamic of wanting to travel/explore and wanting to set down roots somewhere, avoidant communicative tendencies, the support of brotherhood, and finding a sense of self lest you lose yourself in someone else.

All this to say, I'm curious about the other books in the series that focus on the other Hawthorne kids, and I'll be checking them out to see if I like those stories a bit more. 

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Content Warnings

Quotes I highlighted:

"Sometimes I think Brody stayed a little more chill because he felt like he had to balance them out."

"'I'm just seeing you, Kate,' he would always say."

"Feeling attracted to a really attractive man who is also a great guy? I know. It's so surprising."

"This man and his tenderness are going to end my life this very moment."

"It's the strangest thing to look at her and simultaneously see the little girl she was - the one who quizzed me with math problems on the school bus - and the woman she is now."

"You aren't a mess. You're here now. We move forward from here."

"It's a game I always got tired of playing with everyone else, but never with Kate."

"You're going to make me do hard things." "Only because of how much I love you."

"Brody might not be here in person, but he is in every memory, imprinted on my soul in a way that makes coming back feel like I'm coming home to him."

"Home isn't just a place. A concrete thing with walls and a roof. It's a whole passel of people who love and visit and eat casseroles together every weekend."

"'Oh, is that how you want to play it?' Hannah says, cutting Olivia off. She leans forward in her chair. 'Fine. The first time me and your father-'"

"They're like a grove of trees. On the surface, it looks like they're all their own tree, but underneath the ground, their roots are entwined and connected, lending strength and support to whoever needs it most."

"There are never any guarantees, Kate. Not in life, certainly not in love. But that doesn't mean you can't believe a love like that is possible, even hope for it. I'm willing to bet the people who do find it are the ones who always believed they would."

"But Brody has only ever wanted the truth from me. And he's always held whatever that truth is with the same quiet confidence he's done everything in life."

"Maybe if I sit still for once, what I'm looking for will find me." "Maybe you're looking for a home, Kate. A family."

"You are worth staying for. You deserve someone who sees that."

"It feels like our relationship is a constant push and pull of her luring me closer only to knock me upside the head with one of her snide remarks, then soothe the wound with more kindness. It feels like whiplash."

"There's a vulnerability to the way he's holding himself, his eyes focused on our feet."

"(Is he also sparking? Is the sparseness only happening inside of me?)"

"I loved her. But I'm not sure I saw her. Not like I should have."

"Nah. No more running. You can do hard things. We'll do this together."

"I don't need her - or any woman I date - to love whitewater kayaking like I do. That doesn't mean it wouldn't be fun if she did."

"Yep. I'm totally done for. This woman has me."

"A wave of weariness washes over me. I am so tired of telling this story."

"Spend time with Kate. Fall more in love with Kate. Remember that Kate isn't mine to love. And repeat it all again the next day."

"If there's nothing to hold me steady, and nothing to show me where I need to go, how am I supposed to feel anything but lost?"

"I nod my agreement. I would stroll the grocery store aisles with Brody if he asked me to."

"She's asking me a thousand questions with those three words."

"I...do not have the bandwidth to figure this out."

"But I'm glad Aislynn is here to represent women doing something other than spectating."

"And I need you to not ask me for more."

"A fresh wave of shame washes over me. I am not very good at loving people."

"Five minutes ago, I thought I would fix her breakfast, tell her I'm in love with her, and ask her to stay."

"You were already planning this?" "How else would I know there's a fence that needs repairing? I don't pay attention not that kind of crap."

"He might look like he belonged in that fancy life - and maybe he did. But he belongs here too."

"You did. But don't lie to yourself about it. You know you need us, or you wouldn't have come over."

"Then again, he can wake up on his own time, because right now, we're supposed to be talking about me."

"That text message doesn't say she doesn't care about you, Brody. It says she's scared."

"She's got choices to make, and you can't make them for her."

"It feels like she's giving up on something I would fight for no matter what."

"Never stop talking to the normal people in your life - the people who aren't famous. They're the only ones who will keep you grounded."

"I'm serious. I hate it when you guys are together without me."

"Dad takes a deep breath. 'Why don't we start at the beginning?'"

"Anger, hot and thick, coils in my gut, but it is dampened by a profound sadness for my mom. She gave up so much. And for what?"

"She's been putting other people before herself her whole life, Kate. It's what she does. She put your relationship with me - your feelings about me - above everything else."

"She couldn't stop herself from being bitter about it though, and that's what leaked over onto me. Her disappointment. Her hurt."

"I want a home. A family. A life with someone beside me. And I want that someone to be Brody."

"'Hey,' she says gently. 'We don't have to do this anymore. Your mind is clearly somewhere else.' She cocks her head. 'Maybe on someone else?'"

"Plus, I'm done running. I will have this hard conversation. I won't let fear keep me from being vulnerable anymore."

"But it's more than the question. It's everything. It's how well he knows me. It's how much we've been through together and how completely I trust him to take care of me. To love me."

"Or maybe...we'll figure something out? Honestly, I'm kinda tired of figuring stuff out on my own."

"I don't want you to choose me at the expense of all your other dreams."

"'Is my girlfriend jealous?' Ohhhh. That felt good. I need him to call me his girlfriend again."

"'Oh my gosh. I made you listen to all the gritty details of my first kiss!' Brody nods, his expression solemn. 'Worst hour of my life.'"

"I want to marry you. And then I want us to live here so we can make this house our home."

"But it hasn't been nineteen years for you. I was trying to give you some time to, I don't know. Make sure you really want this."

"I love a woman who has her priorities in order. Tacos first, then diamonds."

"These ordinary moments with her, they are all I have ever wanted."