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A review by rebeccathorne
Dragon Marked by Jaymin Eve
3.0
I'm baffled by these reviews.
Spoilers ahead.
Let me start with something good. I couldn't put this book down. So in spite of everything below, keep that in mind. It wasn't a *good* read, but it had the addiction factor of Twilight, the Selection, etc, which is admirable. That's the only reason this book has 3 stars instead of 1 on my rating scale.
I also really, really loved the way Jessa categorized her wolf. The idea of her animal communicating with her through body language and growls, and how the animal simply comes to the forefront when she's ready to shift... that's a cool concept. I immensely enjoyed it.
Now, my problems with it.
Comma splices. Oh my GOD, the comma splices:
"'You need the community to help you, you need a pack.'"
"There was a small dark opening, I slithered up through the gap into the next space."
"Their patience had ended, it was time to go quietly."
"'We have a little time, find me tomorrow.'"
I could keep going. The author knows how to use semicolons, since she inserted them a few times, but she chooses to substitute them for commas more often than not. It's incredibly frustrating, not to mention seriously distracting. There's got to be at least 80 separate instances of them.
I'm sure this book hasn't been edited, which isn't surprising since I'm also fairly sure it's been self-published on Amazon. But honestly, if readers are going to dedicate our precious time for this book, it'd be nice to see that the author has invested just as much (if not much, much more) time into editing the story.
Then we arrive at the characters. Honestly, I hated all of them. Jessa was rude to everyone, and yet they worshiped her for it. The boys were possessive to the point of absurdity. It's possible to have protective characters without them (literally) tossing her around like a football. (How would that even HAPPEN??)
I could get behind the quadruplets, but adding a set of twins to the story seemed ridiculous to me. It doesn't seem to serve any point to the plot. Why not just make them sisters? For the, it'd be just as easy to mention they're more special than all the other . I mean, that's basically what's been happening the whole book anyway. Jessa's so special. Jessa's so powerful. Jessa's so great. It would have been better to mention WHY she's so special and powerful and great, rather than writing the off as being a twin.
Plus, Mischa drives me insane. She's SO weak. It's actually off-putting. She literally contributes nothing to the overall plot, and I don't understand why she's a character at all. I also can't fathom why Lienda, their (assumed) badass wolf shifter of a mother, doesn't take all that time in the "human" world to educate Mischa on self-defense. Lienda already knew they were running for their lives. They moved locations every few years. And she knew Mischa would be returning to the supernatural community eventually. So why why WHY wouldn't Lienda enroll Mischa in some karate classes or something? She literally set her beloved daughter up for failure by not teaching her anything, and it makes no sense to me.
Moving on. Let's talk about Louis, who literally wasn't even mentioned until page 97, and somehow became a love interest. To make it creepier, Louis made a big deal of reminding Jessa that he literally held her as a baby when he. This, keep in mind, was DURING their date. Because dating someone older than your parents isn't creepy at all. (Yes, I know supernaturals live to be 800+ years old. That doesn't change the fact that, while Jessa may not think anything of it, the readers of this book are NOT supernaturals. We live normal length lives, and I personally couldn't grasp the concept of dating someone so much older.)
(And yes, I did read the second book. I know. If that's the case, that we weren't expecting, and that did nothing for the overall plot.)
Also, I'd like to talk about the plot for a minute. What was even HAPPENING here? Find the prison, I know. But why? Because they were curious kids. Okay, fine. Then what about after the. Mission accomplished, right? The book should be over. But then there's another plot, and after that, another one. I couldn't keep track of the characters' goals, because they were always shifting!
To me, the greatest books have one, overarching plot. Subplots, for sure, weave in and out of each other, but I want to have one clear goal in mind. Establish a relationship with someone. Find the mystical object. Save your beloved. Jessa needed a goal. She needed to want something, rather than just reacting to everything that happened. I probably would have rooted for her more, as opposed to generally hoping she'd be killed at some point. >.>
To sum up, this book was basically fanfiction with original characters. Things happened that had no regard to what was established earlier, the characters had ridiculous relationships with each other, and a lot of this novel could be cut during a good editing session. It was like the author gave no regard for how a book should be structured, and instead just wrote whatever the hell she wanted. (Which is totally fine, don't get me wrong. I'd just prefer it not be published as a "finished" book. If it's fluff for the writer, best to keep it on her computer...)
Whew. Okay. So, despite all that, I still finished this book. I read the entire thing in like, two days, while working. It was addictive, and even though a lot of things didn't make sense, I still appreciated the world.
Honestly, if this author had bothered to rewrite this novel a few times before publishing it, it probably could have been a bestseller. As of now, though, I just thought it was unpolished and unbelievable. I was disappointed, because after all these "OMG I LOVE IT" reviews, I was hoping for more.
As I mentioned before, I did buy the second book to see if these problems were explained or resolved. Most of them weren't. I won't be sticking around to see if they're fixed in the third book.
Spoilers ahead.
Let me start with something good. I couldn't put this book down. So in spite of everything below, keep that in mind. It wasn't a *good* read, but it had the addiction factor of Twilight, the Selection, etc, which is admirable. That's the only reason this book has 3 stars instead of 1 on my rating scale.
I also really, really loved the way Jessa categorized her wolf
Spoiler
and dragonNow, my problems with it.
Comma splices. Oh my GOD, the comma splices:
"'You need the community to help you, you need a pack.'"
"There was a small dark opening, I slithered up through the gap into the next space."
"Their patience had ended, it was time to go quietly."
"'We have a little time, find me tomorrow.'"
I could keep going. The author knows how to use semicolons, since she inserted them a few times, but she chooses to substitute them for commas more often than not. It's incredibly frustrating, not to mention seriously distracting. There's got to be at least 80 separate instances of them.
I'm sure this book hasn't been edited, which isn't surprising since I'm also fairly sure it's been self-published on Amazon. But honestly, if readers are going to dedicate our precious time for this book, it'd be nice to see that the author has invested just as much (if not much, much more) time into editing the story.
Then we arrive at the characters. Honestly, I hated all of them. Jessa was rude to everyone, and yet they worshiped her for it. The boys were possessive to the point of absurdity. It's possible to have protective characters without them (literally) tossing her around like a football. (How would that even HAPPEN??)
I could get behind the quadruplets, but adding a set of twins to the story seemed ridiculous to me. It doesn't seem to serve any point to the plot. Why not just make them sisters? For the
Spoiler
points of the dragon marked compassSpoiler
dragon markedSpoiler
dragon markPlus, Mischa drives me insane. She's SO weak. It's actually off-putting. She literally contributes nothing to the overall plot, and I don't understand why she's a character at all. I also can't fathom why Lienda, their (assumed) badass wolf shifter of a mother, doesn't take all that time in the "human" world to educate Mischa on self-defense. Lienda already knew they were running for their lives. They moved locations every few years. And she knew Mischa would be returning to the supernatural community eventually. So why why WHY wouldn't Lienda enroll Mischa in some karate classes or something? She literally set her beloved daughter up for failure by not teaching her anything, and it makes no sense to me.
Moving on. Let's talk about Louis, who literally wasn't even mentioned until page 97, and somehow became a love interest. To make it creepier, Louis made a big deal of reminding Jessa that he literally held her as a baby when he
Spoiler
spelled her dragon mark(And yes, I did read the second book. I know
Spoiler
Louis thinks of her as familySpoiler
then someone tell me why the author felt the need to imply (heavily) that it was romantic from book 1? It just seems like a useless relationshipAlso, I'd like to talk about the plot for a minute. What was even HAPPENING here? Find the prison, I know. But why? Because they were curious kids. Okay, fine. Then what about after the
Spoiler
boys are sent to VanguardTo me, the greatest books have one, overarching plot. Subplots, for sure, weave in and out of each other, but I want to have one clear goal in mind. Establish a relationship with someone. Find the mystical object. Save your beloved. Jessa needed a goal. She needed to want something, rather than just reacting to everything that happened. I probably would have rooted for her more, as opposed to generally hoping she'd be killed at some point. >.>
To sum up, this book was basically fanfiction with original characters. Things happened that had no regard to what was established earlier, the characters had ridiculous relationships with each other, and a lot of this novel could be cut during a good editing session. It was like the author gave no regard for how a book should be structured, and instead just wrote whatever the hell she wanted. (Which is totally fine, don't get me wrong. I'd just prefer it not be published as a "finished" book. If it's fluff for the writer, best to keep it on her computer...)
Whew. Okay. So, despite all that, I still finished this book. I read the entire thing in like, two days, while working. It was addictive, and even though a lot of things didn't make sense, I still appreciated the world.
Honestly, if this author had bothered to rewrite this novel a few times before publishing it, it probably could have been a bestseller. As of now, though, I just thought it was unpolished and unbelievable. I was disappointed, because after all these "OMG I LOVE IT" reviews, I was hoping for more.
As I mentioned before, I did buy the second book to see if these problems were explained or resolved. Most of them weren't. I won't be sticking around to see if they're fixed in the third book.