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A review by geo_ix
Two Roads by Lili St. Germain
5.0
Yeah spoliers.
Don't fucking care right now.
ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME?
Why the FUCK, did no one mention to me, that this book involved a fucking stillbirth?
If I had have known that, I literally would not have read it. Okay, maybe I would, but I wouldn't have read it when my partner was in the house. No sir.
For those who don't know me, 2013 was the year, that I was pregnant with and lost my first child at nearly 22 weeks. Unlike Julez, I didn't bleed, or cramp. I just got a fever, and vomited constantly. I didn't go into labour naturally, I spent all day waiting, my partner slept in the room with me, my first time in hospital. I couldn't sleep until they drugged me. I didn't cry. I was just waiting, it didn't feel real. I woke up and said the same thing Julez did, that I thought I needed to push. I still remember the look on his face when we were told we lost it, and when I finally pushed. He cried, I couldn't. I did when we found out, and I had to call people, but for some reason I shut down. People thought I was crazy. I switched off, I blamed myself for not realising I was much sicker than I should have been. I pulled away from my partner before I realised he was hurting too, but that he wasn't just hurting from losing mason, but me. If I wasn't holding my new baby boy reading this, I probably would have not stopped crying. It's hard to accept that kind of loss, when no one gives you a definitive answer as to why because they don't know, you make up everything in your head. You become your worst enemy.
I think Dornan is in a lot of trouble right now, if someone else was the reason for me losing my first son, I wouldn't care the consequence, I'm not a violent person, but they'd be dead when I saw them before their heart beat the second time.
Don't fucking care right now.
ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME?
Why the FUCK, did no one mention to me, that this book involved a fucking stillbirth?
If I had have known that, I literally would not have read it. Okay, maybe I would, but I wouldn't have read it when my partner was in the house. No sir.
For those who don't know me, 2013 was the year, that I was pregnant with and lost my first child at nearly 22 weeks. Unlike Julez, I didn't bleed, or cramp. I just got a fever, and vomited constantly. I didn't go into labour naturally, I spent all day waiting, my partner slept in the room with me, my first time in hospital. I couldn't sleep until they drugged me. I didn't cry. I was just waiting, it didn't feel real. I woke up and said the same thing Julez did, that I thought I needed to push. I still remember the look on his face when we were told we lost it, and when I finally pushed. He cried, I couldn't. I did when we found out, and I had to call people, but for some reason I shut down. People thought I was crazy. I switched off, I blamed myself for not realising I was much sicker than I should have been. I pulled away from my partner before I realised he was hurting too, but that he wasn't just hurting from losing mason, but me. If I wasn't holding my new baby boy reading this, I probably would have not stopped crying. It's hard to accept that kind of loss, when no one gives you a definitive answer as to why because they don't know, you make up everything in your head. You become your worst enemy.
I think Dornan is in a lot of trouble right now, if someone else was the reason for me losing my first son, I wouldn't care the consequence, I'm not a violent person, but they'd be dead when I saw them before their heart beat the second time.