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A review by andlovetoowillruinus
Crescendo by Becca Fitzpatrick
1.0
This book sucked. Plain and simple. There wasn't a single moment where I could take it seriously. Reading this gave me a stomach ache- the only cure was to stop reading and just laugh off the pain.
But I digress. This is a proper review, after all, and I can't just make fun of the book the whole time.
So let's break down exactly why this book sucked.
Plot
?
There was a plot?
If there was, I didn't quite catch it. The majority of this book consisted of Nora whining over a) breaking up with Patch, b) how much of a twat Patch is (which should cancel out option A– but it doesn't. ~Nora Logic~), and c) the death of Nora's father.
Obviously, only the last of these three points could be considered a proper reason to angst. However, anything relating to Nora's father is pushed back behind the first two points. We only get a few clues about Nora's father, most of which are hallucinations that didn't really happen, so they're just bogus clues.
But plenty of time is spent ~developing~ Nora and Patch's relationship. I say developing mockingly because literally nothing has changed between them since the first book. Patch still doesn't respect Nora's privacy and right to date someone that isn't Patch, and Nora just has jealous fits over her rival, Marcie, hanging out with Patch, even though Nora was the one who broke up with him in the first place– which brings me to my next point.
Characters
They sucked. All of them, except for Marcie– who likes to fuck up Nora's shit and that makes me laugh– and Vee– who isn't as much of a shitty friend in this book as she is in the first one, and she also makes me laugh.
Nora is Nora. Stupidly indecisive about things that couldn't be any more clear-cut and set out in front of her. Helpless in every situation and does little to nothing to advance the (admittedly nonexistent) plot.
Patch is still a douchebag. Obsessive and creepy and stalkerish. He's supposed to be wank fuel for preteen girls, I guess, but I'm not really feeling the appeal here. I mean, if your EX-boyfriend (EX EX EX EX EX) barged in on you while you're with another guy and punches him in the face, wouldn't that piss you off? Just a little? Considering he's your ex? Yeah, that's what I mean by saying he's a douche.
As mentioned before, Marcie and Vee were tolerable– although there is a bit of hypocrisy on Marcie's part. The slut-shaming that goes into her character is massive, but Marcie doesn't seem to care– which is great! Slut-shaming sucks and it's a pretty big indicator of a shitty young adult novel. However, despite the fact that Marcie doesn't care for slut-shaming against her, she uses it– a lot– in someone else's situation. But besides that, both Vee and Marcie added a lot more to the story in terms of humor (on Vee's part) and plot (on Marcie's part). However, two good secondary characters can't ultimately fill up the places of two empty main characters.
Scott is your generic third-wheel/plot device guy. He made no impact whatsoever on me.
The Writing
...was disappointing, as usual. If you've read the first book and want to read this one in hopes of an improvement... you'll be disappointed.
Cover
At the very least, the cover is consistent with the first book in the series. To me, it seems rather dull, because the whole mesh of gray and silver just doesn't appeal to me, and the red isn't enough to catch my eye.
Final Rating: 1 star.
But I digress. This is a proper review, after all, and I can't just make fun of the book the whole time.
So let's break down exactly why this book sucked.
Plot
?
There was a plot?
If there was, I didn't quite catch it. The majority of this book consisted of Nora whining over a) breaking up with Patch, b) how much of a twat Patch is (which should cancel out option A– but it doesn't. ~Nora Logic~), and c) the death of Nora's father.
Obviously, only the last of these three points could be considered a proper reason to angst. However, anything relating to Nora's father is pushed back behind the first two points. We only get a few clues about Nora's father, most of which are hallucinations that didn't really happen, so they're just bogus clues.
But plenty of time is spent ~developing~ Nora and Patch's relationship. I say developing mockingly because literally nothing has changed between them since the first book. Patch still doesn't respect Nora's privacy and right to date someone that isn't Patch, and Nora just has jealous fits over her rival, Marcie, hanging out with Patch, even though Nora was the one who broke up with him in the first place– which brings me to my next point.
Characters
They sucked. All of them, except for Marcie– who likes to fuck up Nora's shit and that makes me laugh– and Vee– who isn't as much of a shitty friend in this book as she is in the first one, and she also makes me laugh.
Nora is Nora. Stupidly indecisive about things that couldn't be any more clear-cut and set out in front of her. Helpless in every situation and does little to nothing to advance the (admittedly nonexistent) plot.
Patch is still a douchebag. Obsessive and creepy and stalkerish. He's supposed to be wank fuel for preteen girls, I guess, but I'm not really feeling the appeal here. I mean, if your EX-boyfriend (EX EX EX EX EX) barged in on you while you're with another guy and punches him in the face, wouldn't that piss you off? Just a little? Considering he's your ex? Yeah, that's what I mean by saying he's a douche.
As mentioned before, Marcie and Vee were tolerable– although there is a bit of hypocrisy on Marcie's part. The slut-shaming that goes into her character is massive, but Marcie doesn't seem to care– which is great! Slut-shaming sucks and it's a pretty big indicator of a shitty young adult novel. However, despite the fact that Marcie doesn't care for slut-shaming against her, she uses it– a lot– in someone else's situation.
Spoiler
This is a pretty big spoiler, so skip it if you don't care for specifics. Marcie reveals that her dad's having an affair with a single woman, and calls the woman a whore– disregarding her father's part in his infidelity, and the fact that the woman's only partner is Mr. Millar.Scott is your generic third-wheel/plot device guy. He made no impact whatsoever on me.
Spoiler
Surprise, surprise, he leaves at the end of the book. Didn't see that coming, nope.The Writing
...was disappointing, as usual. If you've read the first book and want to read this one in hopes of an improvement... you'll be disappointed.
Cover
At the very least, the cover is consistent with the first book in the series. To me, it seems rather dull, because the whole mesh of gray and silver just doesn't appeal to me, and the red isn't enough to catch my eye.
Final Rating: 1 star.