Take a photo of a barcode or cover
dinahfay 's review for:
Against Love: A Polemic
by Laura Kipnis
Alright, Laura. Here's the skinny. Your book caused a bit of an uproar when it came out, because your whole angle is anti-everything this country and its romantic populace stand for. You make a convincing argument that lifelong exclusive coupledom is for the birds (swans, specifically), and that we humans have a lousy track record at it. Thing is, the current divorce rate and latest news update on a Republican family values guy make the same point, in far fewer pages.
I guess this book would be a better read for someone who hasn't spent much head-time with queer theory. It was hard to be shocked with your breathless assertions that monogamy doesn't work for everyone, that the definition of marriage and relationships have changed over time, that better systems exist in theory and reality.
And that really was the big problem with this book: the breathlessness. I was continually flabbergasted by the length of sentences, the way paragraphs spanned pages, the sheer number of parentheticals crammed into a single unit. The book is snarky to the point of obnoxiousness -- the sort of thing that I would love to read in blog-length snippets, ripping away at the heteronormative assumption of the day, but for a whole book the tone was beyond tedious.
That being said, some of your points fucked me up real good, Laura. There's a long examination of how we apply metaphors of labor to love, i.e. "working on a relationship." So we come home from work to do much harder work. Should love be a thing that's worked at? Is the stability of coupled life worth it? I might be able to think about these questions more clearly reading Laura Kipnis's ideas, written by somebody else who does not give the impression of authoring on amphetamines.
Can this be blamed on the form? Maybe. Polemics have fallen out of fashion for a reason. I think that reason is, nearly everything we read is polemical these days. Opinions are radicalized to the extreme, although good theorists and reporters do try to make a nod to the other side. There's a value to calling a spade a spade, and there certainly is something radical about taking Love to task. But the problem with a polemic is that it offers no viable alternatives. Which isn't the point! I know! But if you're going to make me feel troubled, I'd like you to also give me a little bit of hope, Laura. There's gotta be something salvageable about this love business.
I guess this book would be a better read for someone who hasn't spent much head-time with queer theory. It was hard to be shocked with your breathless assertions that monogamy doesn't work for everyone, that the definition of marriage and relationships have changed over time, that better systems exist in theory and reality.
And that really was the big problem with this book: the breathlessness. I was continually flabbergasted by the length of sentences, the way paragraphs spanned pages, the sheer number of parentheticals crammed into a single unit. The book is snarky to the point of obnoxiousness -- the sort of thing that I would love to read in blog-length snippets, ripping away at the heteronormative assumption of the day, but for a whole book the tone was beyond tedious.
That being said, some of your points fucked me up real good, Laura. There's a long examination of how we apply metaphors of labor to love, i.e. "working on a relationship." So we come home from work to do much harder work. Should love be a thing that's worked at? Is the stability of coupled life worth it? I might be able to think about these questions more clearly reading Laura Kipnis's ideas, written by somebody else who does not give the impression of authoring on amphetamines.
Can this be blamed on the form? Maybe. Polemics have fallen out of fashion for a reason. I think that reason is, nearly everything we read is polemical these days. Opinions are radicalized to the extreme, although good theorists and reporters do try to make a nod to the other side. There's a value to calling a spade a spade, and there certainly is something radical about taking Love to task. But the problem with a polemic is that it offers no viable alternatives. Which isn't the point! I know! But if you're going to make me feel troubled, I'd like you to also give me a little bit of hope, Laura. There's gotta be something salvageable about this love business.