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A review by terranstorm
XOXY: A Memoir (Intersex Woman, Mother, Activist) by Kimberly M. Zieselman
hopeful
informative
slow-paced
2.0
Important topic, but not a great book if I'm being honest. I enjoyed the beginning, maybe the first third before I noticed I was skimming, and it got worse from there. Reads like "and then, and then, and then", a string of events without a compelling narrative. A rather wandering read that was altogether far too long for what was conveyed.
The personal reflections that were present at the start got more and more buried in the "and thens" of it all. If I mostly wanted a rundown on the timeline of progress toward gaining visibility (and some measure of redress) for Intersex individuals, a (short) article would have served better. Then there were the side-tracks about adoption and finding appropriate schooling for a daughter's IEP, and while I have no doubt a memoir writer could make a compelling and effective tale out of all of it together, in the hands of this writer it felt unfocused, the through-line unclear.
Lastly, there was an element of "my experience unexpectedly becoming an activist", riding out the ups and downs and many frustrations of the advocacy work. That was expected and would have been welcome... but these all felt like 101-level conclusions and, in the mix with other drawbacks, it came across as repetitive and largely uninteresting.
The personal reflections that were present at the start got more and more buried in the "and thens" of it all. If I mostly wanted a rundown on the timeline of progress toward gaining visibility (and some measure of redress) for Intersex individuals, a (short) article would have served better. Then there were the side-tracks about adoption and finding appropriate schooling for a daughter's IEP, and while I have no doubt a memoir writer could make a compelling and effective tale out of all of it together, in the hands of this writer it felt unfocused, the through-line unclear.
Lastly, there was an element of "my experience unexpectedly becoming an activist", riding out the ups and downs and many frustrations of the advocacy work. That was expected and would have been welcome... but these all felt like 101-level conclusions and, in the mix with other drawbacks, it came across as repetitive and largely uninteresting.
Content Warnings
Graphic: Medical trauma, Gaslighting
Moderate: Infertility, Panic attacks/disorders, Transphobia
Minor: Infidelity
Disassociation