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halthemonarch 's review for:
The Bonesetter's Daughter
by Amy Tan
We follow mother LuiLing and daughter Ruth in this story about generational trauma and family. We start with Ruth’s point of view, wishing her mother were different, that her life was different. Sometimes she’s embarrassed, but mostly she finds herself in the position of minding her mother, who in her old age seems to be going senile. When we get to Liuling’s chapters however, we learn that she knows exactly what she’s saying, and that her life had been filled with hardship from a very young age. Her parentage was a source of shame for her family, so they lied to her about it. Her aunt became her mother so that she might have a last name and a future beyond being a ward, and her mother became her handmaiden, always by her side with advice and strong hands that taught her a sign language only the two of them could understand. One day she tells her handmaiden that she is to marry, but the man she would marry brought about the death of her biological father (unbeknownst to her). The handmaiden (her mother, although she didn’t know it until it was too late) begged her not to go through with it, but Liuling shrugged her off. The handmaiden, her mother, killed herself by jumping from “the end of the world”, a ravine at the far end of their village. It isn’t until after that she learns the truth.
A lifetime later Liuling names her daughter Ruth, after her handmaiden. Ruth is embarrassed that Liuling with her heavy accent can barely pronounce her own daughter’s name. Ruth is anxious and quiet, a shadow in her mother’s manic sunlight. She receives little love from her mother who grew up with traumas that Ruth couldn't even imagine, and little recognition in the family she married into as a fixture in the family. She feels lonely and unjustified which are things that I could relate to. Ruth is married and has step children but none of her own.
I came away from this book with a little more understanding of what China was like between 1915 and 1950. I came away with the impression that Amy Tan is best at leaving; the formula of fraught mother/daughter seems to be Tan’s bread and butter. I’m at a point in my life where I feel like my mother and I keep miscommunicating with each other and books like this, although not exact allegories, helped me to put words and names to some of the feelings I have about our relationship.
A lifetime later Liuling names her daughter Ruth, after her handmaiden. Ruth is embarrassed that Liuling with her heavy accent can barely pronounce her own daughter’s name. Ruth is anxious and quiet, a shadow in her mother’s manic sunlight. She receives little love from her mother who grew up with traumas that Ruth couldn't even imagine, and little recognition in the family she married into as a fixture in the family. She feels lonely and unjustified which are things that I could relate to. Ruth is married and has step children but none of her own.
I came away from this book with a little more understanding of what China was like between 1915 and 1950. I came away with the impression that Amy Tan is best at leaving; the formula of fraught mother/daughter seems to be Tan’s bread and butter. I’m at a point in my life where I feel like my mother and I keep miscommunicating with each other and books like this, although not exact allegories, helped me to put words and names to some of the feelings I have about our relationship.