4.0

It's unfortunate that Chua was vilified for this book. 1) it's a memoir, her experience 2) she's hardly trying to prove herself as an expert on child-rearing 3) there's a lot to learn here - about differences in how we raise our kids 4) she grows from this experience and learns a lesson herself.

While Chua does argue that the "Chinese Way" is better than the "Western Way" she does so with reserve. She acknowledges that she has been ridiculous in some of her tactics. And the book is filled with comedic moments. (I loved her tone.) I never felt that anything she did was abusive. (Personally, not my style - very harsh - but I DO understand her POV.)

One of my favorite philosophies of the "Chinese Way" is that in Chinese culture adults do the choosing for children. This is completely contrary to Western philosophies of choice. Chua argues that children do not always know what's best and that they will one day be adults who look back and are grateful for the choices made by their parents.

This caused me to reflect on my life "Was there anything I was forced to do?" (My parents were not ridiculously strict, but we had rules and expectations.) If there is one thing I am glad I was forced to do was learn Spanish... something that was at time 'by force' - especially as I grew into a teenager and didn't want to keep up with it... but I didn't have the foresight to know the great value that this second language would have on me today. I look back and am so grateful for the Saturdays in Argentine school, the summers in Spanish summer school, the lessons my mom made us do at home, and the rule "Spanish must be spoken at the dinner table". I hated this as a pre-teen and teenager - but am SO grateful now.

While Chua's parenting can be 'mean' in a lot of ways, she definitely makes some strong points that we all can learn from.