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A review by thislemonreads
The Lonely Hunter: How Our Search for Love Is Broken by Aimée Lutkin
3.0
There was a lot I identified with in this book - the shallow, or rather, hollow nature of most interactions in modern dating, the loneliness that is exacerbated by feeling judged for your aloneness, and the frustrations that come with being told if you only acted or looked a certain way, your true love would come along - as if all people in relationships are perfect physical and emotional specimens who have reached some higher plane of existence. I laughed out loud at the accuracy of some of her observations, for instance, the explosion in polyamory in online dating, and what it feels like to ghost and be ghosted.
However, I was ultimately disappointed in the conclusion of the book, which didn’t feel like a conclusion at all, and it sometimes felt like the research was included awkwardly. The chapter on COVID felt forced. While the author very accurately captures what it feels like to be a single woman in your thirties - her descriptions of Tinder dates and being the odd person out at social gatherings, feeling uncelebrated due to your lack of “achievements” such as marriage or children, it didn’t feel like she ultimately had a message about the significance that could and does exist in living your life alone.
However, I was ultimately disappointed in the conclusion of the book, which didn’t feel like a conclusion at all, and it sometimes felt like the research was included awkwardly. The chapter on COVID felt forced. While the author very accurately captures what it feels like to be a single woman in your thirties - her descriptions of Tinder dates and being the odd person out at social gatherings, feeling uncelebrated due to your lack of “achievements” such as marriage or children, it didn’t feel like she ultimately had a message about the significance that could and does exist in living your life alone.