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A review by jamesloren
The 5 Love Languages: The Secret to Love That Lasts by Gary Chapman
4.0
There's a reason why this is an international bestseller and why you don't go a week without hearing about love languages. The core of the book is groundbreaking and helpful and applicable to countless types of interpersonal relationships -- but you can learn about the concept without reading the book. Anyway, that's why I gave it 4 stars. It's helped a lot of people!
I didn't know going in, by my own ignorance, that this was published 30 years ago and that the author was a southern baptist preacher who is now in his 80s. The case studies reflect a very narrow type of relationship dynamic from the 60s/70s/80s. For example, a story told in this book of a husband "facing his stereotypes about men and women" revolved around him having to challenge his core belief that "husbands don't change diapers." The views expressed about sex and gender (women are driven by emotions & men by biology; teenagers have sex because they are unloved by their parents; etc) ......match the author's profile.
The archaic and limited nature of all of the case studies means that while there are plenty of lessons to take away here, you have to do a lot of the mental work while you read to apply the principles to your own modern and/or queer and/or secular and/or etc relationship. I feel like this would make the book not particularly worth it to a majority of people nowadays.
I didn't know going in, by my own ignorance, that this was published 30 years ago and that the author was a southern baptist preacher who is now in his 80s. The case studies reflect a very narrow type of relationship dynamic from the 60s/70s/80s. For example, a story told in this book of a husband "facing his stereotypes about men and women" revolved around him having to challenge his core belief that "husbands don't change diapers." The views expressed about sex and gender (women are driven by emotions & men by biology; teenagers have sex because they are unloved by their parents; etc) ......match the author's profile.
The archaic and limited nature of all of the case studies means that while there are plenty of lessons to take away here, you have to do a lot of the mental work while you read to apply the principles to your own modern and/or queer and/or secular and/or etc relationship. I feel like this would make the book not particularly worth it to a majority of people nowadays.