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yalena 's review for:
A Woman Is No Man
by Etaf Rum
challenging
dark
emotional
hopeful
informative
inspiring
reflective
sad
tense
medium-paced
Plot or Character Driven:
Character
Strong character development:
Yes
Loveable characters:
Yes
Diverse cast of characters:
Yes
Flaws of characters a main focus:
No
"Heaven lies under a mother's feet"
I had been waiting for months to read this book and, frankly, knew nothing about what the book was about; the title had just caught my eye. The world manifested this for me as I was able to celebrate a ceasefire in the midst of reading a novel about Palestinian women BY a Palestinian author.
I found it hard to get through this book many times. I am a vivid reader and truly immerse myself in the world that unfolds in the pages. When it comes to a book like this, where the hardship of women is displayed so clearly in the pages, I find it difficult to continue. I am not Palestinian and have never experienced even an ounce of the cultural and traditional trauma that comes with being a woman within a culture like such.
Many times throughout the story, I found myself carrying a deep disdain for Fareeda. I can understand culture but there was something deeply vile about turning your back on abuse, regardless of the situation. I disliked the way she continually used the same 'rules' that hurt her to justify her hurt onto Sarah, Isra, Deya, and so forth. As the book continued to unfold, I was able to internalize her life experience as a character and how that can morph your thoughts, regardless of your convictions.
Sarah upset me many times as she as a character was always so broad and full of contradictions. You would think as someone who reached out to your niece to tell her the truth, you would be prepared to communicate with her more straightforwardly. I shared Deya's frustration with this. But such is the reality for us as humans; we are all full of contradictions.
I can understand some of the reviews that highlight how this was a gross generalization. But the fact of the matter is, this was not a sociological deep dive into all Palestinian women's experiences,
but instead, a book that highlighted the VERY REAL life of many individuals, regardless of their ethnicity.
I cried so many times in this book. I felt for the characters, especially Isra. The concept of being married off, moving to a completely different country and culture, and having to bear children while being a child herself is a pain I can only read and sympathize with.
Deya and her bravery to seek out something different was refreshing.
Fareeda's pain and harshness were jarring and layered. I even felt shame as I related to the attitude Fareeda carried; she did what she did because she did not want to be the only one carrying hurt, she wanted to see others going through it to feel justified.
With this being her first book, Etea Rum did a fantastic job framing the baggage that comes with tradition and culture. The inescapable prisons it puts us in and the pain that is used as padding to uphold the same.
I will probably think of more remarks about the book later on, but for now, I am just humbled to have read this and allow gratitude to wash over me.
I had been waiting for months to read this book and, frankly, knew nothing about what the book was about; the title had just caught my eye. The world manifested this for me as I was able to celebrate a ceasefire in the midst of reading a novel about Palestinian women BY a Palestinian author.
I found it hard to get through this book many times. I am a vivid reader and truly immerse myself in the world that unfolds in the pages. When it comes to a book like this, where the hardship of women is displayed so clearly in the pages, I find it difficult to continue. I am not Palestinian and have never experienced even an ounce of the cultural and traditional trauma that comes with being a woman within a culture like such.
Many times throughout the story, I found myself carrying a deep disdain for Fareeda. I can understand culture but there was something deeply vile about turning your back on abuse, regardless of the situation. I disliked the way she continually used the same 'rules' that hurt her to justify her hurt onto Sarah, Isra, Deya, and so forth. As the book continued to unfold, I was able to internalize her life experience as a character and how that can morph your thoughts, regardless of your convictions.
Sarah upset me many times as she as a character was always so broad and full of contradictions. You would think as someone who reached out to your niece to tell her the truth, you would be prepared to communicate with her more straightforwardly. I shared Deya's frustration with this. But such is the reality for us as humans; we are all full of contradictions.
I can understand some of the reviews that highlight how this was a gross generalization. But the fact of the matter is, this was not a sociological deep dive into all Palestinian women's experiences,
but instead, a book that highlighted the VERY REAL life of many individuals, regardless of their ethnicity.
I cried so many times in this book. I felt for the characters, especially Isra. The concept of being married off, moving to a completely different country and culture, and having to bear children while being a child herself is a pain I can only read and sympathize with.
Deya and her bravery to seek out something different was refreshing.
Fareeda's pain and harshness were jarring and layered. I even felt shame as I related to the attitude Fareeda carried; she did what she did because she did not want to be the only one carrying hurt, she wanted to see others going through it to feel justified.
With this being her first book, Etea Rum did a fantastic job framing the baggage that comes with tradition and culture. The inescapable prisons it puts us in and the pain that is used as padding to uphold the same.
I will probably think of more remarks about the book later on, but for now, I am just humbled to have read this and allow gratitude to wash over me.
Content Warnings
Moderate: Domestic abuse, Physical abuse, Murder
Minor: Alcoholism, Grief