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A review by romcombc
Sushi and Sea Lions by Rachel Corsini
emotional
hopeful
inspiring
reflective
medium-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? It's complicated
- Diverse cast of characters? No
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
4.0
While I was bewildered by the title, I was drawn to this book based on the summary. A huge fan of the movie Center Stage and still building up the courage to watch Black Swan, I have an admiration for the dedication and sacrifice that goes into being a ballerina – especially the elite status of being a prima ballerina. To read a story of a woman who achieved the impossible only to lose it all, I wanted to see what message Rachel would carve out for her readers. Sushi and Sea Lions takes on the challenging approach of what happens after the fairytale is achieved and the credits roll. Sometimes they don’t get to live happily ever after. What do they do then when their once perfect fairytale becomes their living nightmare?
All Daniela (Dany) ever wanted to do was touch the sky. Her dreams came true when she was accepted into the Academy at age fourteen. As an aspiring ballerina, nothing but perfection was acceptable. Hitting milestones, surpassing expectations, and countless achievements later – life was beyond what she ever imagined. She achieved her dream, she was touching the sky, until she wasn’t. One bad landing and in a flash, her world came to an end. Lost and alone, heaven never seemed so far away. Foot surgery, early retirement, Dany didn’t know which way was up anymore. It was all gone, the admiration, the money, and the man she thought loved her. The only thing left was to move back to Queens and discover what else life had to offer. Despite supportive friends and loving parents, without ballet and Nate, what was the point. It wasn’t until she went out to celebrate her brother’s birthday that she found a reason to breathe again, that reason was Vinny. Convinced that he would only ever see her as her brother’s little sister, Dany suppresses her unrealistic desires and settles for a quickly budding friendship. Along the way, she learns that he is also rediscovering his place in life after separating from a cheating wife and moving on. No longer feeling alone on this journey of rediscovery, Dany finds herself growing closer and closer to Vinny but can two people with unrepaired damaged be right for each other or is it a disaster waiting to happen?
What I like about it: I always enjoy a good journey to self love and self discovery. For most of Daniela’s teen and adult life, she was fulfilling a role. The problem is the standards of that role were defined by those who demanded perfection. She had to be the perfect ballerina, the perfect girlfriend, the embodiment of fantasy and dreams. The issue with a bar that high is that if, by some miracle, you reach it – you have to question how much you sacrificed to rise that high as well as fear the bar being lifted even higher. I enjoyed the mirroring events that happened in her life that gave perspectives.Chad was to her as she was to Nate. She easily fell into the victimized role (justifiably so) as Nate used her but when she began to vent and was confronted with the reality that she had, essentially, done the exact same thing with Chad – using him to fulfill a need, negating his feelings, leading him own, it was a wonderful observation to see that switch flip and for her to understand truly why her and Nate would have never worked. Yes, she had already moved on but Vinny was the reason she was able to say goodbye to Nate. That moment with Chad, to me, was when she truly let go and accepted that Vinny or not, not being chosen had nothing to do with her. She realized you can’t control who you fall for, no more than Chad falling for her or her falling for Nate and it not being reciprocated. On that same note, while the Gala situation was heartbreaking (loved James by the way and his snide comment earned him a special place in my heart), if Vinny had been there – Dany wouldn’t have gotten the closure she didn’t realize she needed, not just to ballet, her former life, but to all of it – the dream, the fantasy. To have Nate still pursuing her despite the fact that he was engaged to a woman carrying his child, consider bullet dodged!
For Vinny, I agree with Dany’s assessment that he was trying to hold onto a perfection that never existed. His ex-wife was a walking disaster. Matthew made that clear when he shared that she was never happy, despite who her partner was. She fought with Tony, she fought with Vinny, she picked fights with Dany – she was just a miserable human being. Unlike Tony, Vinny kept trying to mold himself into what he believed was perfection in her eyes, changing his major, no longer drawing, working himself to death so she didn’t have to lift a finger but had money to spend. No wonder why he was broken. He did everything to only get heartbreak in return, his forever coming to a crashing halt with cheating and lies. Mellie was right, you don’t come back from that the same. The problem with Vinny was that he wasn’t moving past it or risen above it. He wanted the easiness of wishing he hadn’t rocked the boat, even if it meant being unhappy. He was too blind to the life he could have with Dany because it wasn’t picture perfect – but what is?
Despite, enjoying this book immensely, I had trouble connecting with the characters. While I sympathized with Daniela and her lost, I myself have never had something so defining that once gone, I had no idea who I was anymore. This was such a HUGE part of the story, of Daniela’s identity that not being able to empathize with her made it difficult to walk beside her in her journey of finding herself again. I became a spectator – watching what was happening, trusting what was being told to me, but closed off to feeling it for myself. Yes, in many stories, a deeper connection to the character is not necessary. In this case, to truly absorb Daniela’s tale, it was crucial to know and feel her pain or something so closely relatable that you were able to shed tears if not with her, for her. That along with the ambiguity of the ending is what kept this from being a home run for me.
Speaking of the ending – if I am being honest, I was quite confused and I feel like an epilogue would have helped me understand which way to go in terms of accepting the outcome. Their fallout was because Daniela wanted the fairytale, the happy ever after, the love she read in books. She envisioned marriage and babies, the ideal future with the man she loved. Vinny made it perfectly clear that he had no desire to marry again and didn’t want to start over when it came to kids. Attempting to dip his toe back into his old life, he caused a rift in his relationship, proving to Dany where is loyalty lied. Got that! The problem I have is once it was all resolved, he was forgiven, she learned to love herself without the validation of others, and he proved himself to her, in a way she could see and feel, and they got back together – what was next? We already knew they were in love with each other but what now – was Vinny open to the possibility of marriage and kids (what Dany supposedly wanted now, despite how she felt in the past) OR was Dany willing to be happy in the life of the forever girlfriend, with the knowledge that it would not go beyond that (what those around her said she wanted anyway, eluded to the desire of marriage and kids being false or only temporary due to her ideology of the ideal HEA)? Again, an epilogue who have helped me know how to absorb the ending, instead in leaving me in limbo.
Diving back into the story, the spicy scenes in this book were surreal. Rachel did a fantastic job of showing three different sides of intimacy with Dany: her being closed off (Chad and the Billys), her being open and her partner being closed off (Nate), and both people being completely open (Vinny). Rachel showed us that Dany was her most vulnerable in these moments so we were in her head, going through the psychological war of mental and physical entanglement. With Chad (and the Billys), it was chasing a feeling lost, filling a void, avoiding an sense of emptiness and despair but indirectly promoting the opportunity of self -loathing. Everyone had used her, why couldn’t she do the same. With Nate, it was being open and raw but knowing it meant nothing, desperately needing it to mean everything. The act screamed “love me”, “see me”, “choose me” with the knowledge of delusion and perpetuating cycle of disappointment and again, self-loathing. With Vinny, we got to see what it looked like when she was the focus, the center of attention, loved, admired, center stage again with admiration. She danced with the rawness of emotions, leaving it all on the table and with him, she did the same thing – letting go and feeling it all. Knowing herself, trusting herself, trusting her partner. Through these moments, we were able to learn more about Dany than she was ever willing to share.
Those moments and the moment Dany finally chose herself were the best parts of this book. Her enlightenment began in Greece when she realized she would survive and culminated when she looked at herself in the mirror and accepted all of her. This is what made the entire journey you had witnessed worth it. Having always been everything to everyone but never anything to herself, we witnessed her rebirth.
The book in itself is thought provoking and laced with heartfelt and heartbreaking moments. While I had trouble connecting with these characters to truly feel these moments, they were extremely well written and for someone who can empathize with either character, especially to love something or someone and lose it in a devastating manner, they will be drawn in and brought to tears.
All Daniela (Dany) ever wanted to do was touch the sky. Her dreams came true when she was accepted into the Academy at age fourteen. As an aspiring ballerina, nothing but perfection was acceptable. Hitting milestones, surpassing expectations, and countless achievements later – life was beyond what she ever imagined. She achieved her dream, she was touching the sky, until she wasn’t. One bad landing and in a flash, her world came to an end. Lost and alone, heaven never seemed so far away. Foot surgery, early retirement, Dany didn’t know which way was up anymore. It was all gone, the admiration, the money, and the man she thought loved her. The only thing left was to move back to Queens and discover what else life had to offer. Despite supportive friends and loving parents, without ballet and Nate, what was the point. It wasn’t until she went out to celebrate her brother’s birthday that she found a reason to breathe again, that reason was Vinny. Convinced that he would only ever see her as her brother’s little sister, Dany suppresses her unrealistic desires and settles for a quickly budding friendship. Along the way, she learns that he is also rediscovering his place in life after separating from a cheating wife and moving on. No longer feeling alone on this journey of rediscovery, Dany finds herself growing closer and closer to Vinny but can two people with unrepaired damaged be right for each other or is it a disaster waiting to happen?
What I like about it: I always enjoy a good journey to self love and self discovery. For most of Daniela’s teen and adult life, she was fulfilling a role. The problem is the standards of that role were defined by those who demanded perfection. She had to be the perfect ballerina, the perfect girlfriend, the embodiment of fantasy and dreams. The issue with a bar that high is that if, by some miracle, you reach it – you have to question how much you sacrificed to rise that high as well as fear the bar being lifted even higher. I enjoyed the mirroring events that happened in her life that gave perspectives.
For Vinny, I agree with Dany’s assessment that he was trying to hold onto a perfection that never existed. His ex-wife was a walking disaster. Matthew made that clear when he shared that she was never happy, despite who her partner was. She fought with Tony, she fought with Vinny, she picked fights with Dany – she was just a miserable human being. Unlike Tony, Vinny kept trying to mold himself into what he believed was perfection in her eyes, changing his major, no longer drawing, working himself to death so she didn’t have to lift a finger but had money to spend. No wonder why he was broken. He did everything to only get heartbreak in return, his forever coming to a crashing halt with cheating and lies. Mellie was right, you don’t come back from that the same. The problem with Vinny was that he wasn’t moving past it or risen above it. He wanted the easiness of wishing he hadn’t rocked the boat, even if it meant being unhappy. He was too blind to the life he could have with Dany because it wasn’t picture perfect – but what is?
Despite, enjoying this book immensely, I had trouble connecting with the characters. While I sympathized with Daniela and her lost, I myself have never had something so defining that once gone, I had no idea who I was anymore. This was such a HUGE part of the story, of Daniela’s identity that not being able to empathize with her made it difficult to walk beside her in her journey of finding herself again. I became a spectator – watching what was happening, trusting what was being told to me, but closed off to feeling it for myself. Yes, in many stories, a deeper connection to the character is not necessary. In this case, to truly absorb Daniela’s tale, it was crucial to know and feel her pain or something so closely relatable that you were able to shed tears if not with her, for her. That along with the ambiguity of the ending is what kept this from being a home run for me.
Speaking of the ending – if I am being honest, I was quite confused and I feel like an epilogue would have helped me understand which way to go in terms of accepting the outcome. Their fallout was because Daniela wanted the fairytale, the happy ever after, the love she read in books. She envisioned marriage and babies, the ideal future with the man she loved. Vinny made it perfectly clear that he had no desire to marry again and didn’t want to start over when it came to kids. Attempting to dip his toe back into his old life, he caused a rift in his relationship, proving to Dany where is loyalty lied. Got that! The problem I have is once it was all resolved, he was forgiven, she learned to love herself without the validation of others, and he proved himself to her, in a way she could see and feel, and they got back together – what was next? We already knew they were in love with each other but what now – was Vinny open to the possibility of marriage and kids (what Dany supposedly wanted now, despite how she felt in the past) OR was Dany willing to be happy in the life of the forever girlfriend, with the knowledge that it would not go beyond that (what those around her said she wanted anyway, eluded to the desire of marriage and kids being false or only temporary due to her ideology of the ideal HEA)? Again, an epilogue who have helped me know how to absorb the ending, instead in leaving me in limbo.
Diving back into the story, the spicy scenes in this book were surreal. Rachel did a fantastic job of showing three different sides of intimacy with Dany: her being closed off (Chad and the Billys), her being open and her partner being closed off (Nate), and both people being completely open (Vinny). Rachel showed us that Dany was her most vulnerable in these moments so we were in her head, going through the psychological war of mental and physical entanglement. With Chad (and the Billys), it was chasing a feeling lost, filling a void, avoiding an sense of emptiness and despair but indirectly promoting the opportunity of self -loathing. Everyone had used her, why couldn’t she do the same. With Nate, it was being open and raw but knowing it meant nothing, desperately needing it to mean everything. The act screamed “love me”, “see me”, “choose me” with the knowledge of delusion and perpetuating cycle of disappointment and again, self-loathing. With Vinny, we got to see what it looked like when she was the focus, the center of attention, loved, admired, center stage again with admiration. She danced with the rawness of emotions, leaving it all on the table and with him, she did the same thing – letting go and feeling it all. Knowing herself, trusting herself, trusting her partner. Through these moments, we were able to learn more about Dany than she was ever willing to share.
Those moments and the moment Dany finally chose herself were the best parts of this book. Her enlightenment began in Greece when she realized she would survive and culminated when she looked at herself in the mirror and accepted all of her. This is what made the entire journey you had witnessed worth it. Having always been everything to everyone but never anything to herself, we witnessed her rebirth.
The book in itself is thought provoking and laced with heartfelt and heartbreaking moments. While I had trouble connecting with these characters to truly feel these moments, they were extremely well written and for someone who can empathize with either character, especially to love something or someone and lose it in a devastating manner, they will be drawn in and brought to tears.