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A review by kbbru
Spare by Prince Harry
emotional
informative
sad
medium-paced
3.75
I hadn't planned on reading the book, but here we are. While some of the middle parts of the book dragged a bit, it was a relatively fast and easy read over all.
While "shocking" seems to be a common word applied to his story, none of the contents are particularly surprising if you're familiar with the dynamics of dysfunctional families and institutional oppression. It's all there and it tracks.
What I didn't expect was the ways in which I identified with Harry's experience of a long distance serious relationship, his determination not to repeat the family mistakes, etc.
Other parts of the book were very much not for me, but the chapters were all short, making it easy to keep moving. I can appreciate the bravery it takes to own your (painful) story and share it, even while not yet having enough distance from parts of it to really dig deep.
My critiques are not for how he's handled the situation with his family. It's easy to judge from the outside and with emotional distance how you might have done things differently, to take potshots that give a sense of superiority. It's a different thing altogether to be inside such emotionally fraught circumstances doing the best you can.
The book works if you loved Diana or want to know more about the lives of the family without all the PR shine (like Charles doing headstands in his boxers). If you really connect with stories about dysfunctional families or a controlling, spiteful older brother, Harry has you covered. Maybe you want to read the story of a man who had a painful start in life, but he's doing the work, making mistakes, and trying to change his narrative from the foreordained conclusion. Check, check. My reasons are my own, but any of the above a good entry points for connecting.
If you're looking for an insightful critique of the monarchy or probing into the history of its wrongs, this isn't that book. Colonialism is not reckoned with. And William's tantrum about Africa, as though it's his toy, is sickening.
The book is very personal, raw at times, seething against a villainous press and reeling under the relentless gaslighting and lies. There are places to roll your eyes and some funny moments. Harry is also tender as husband and father, grandson, and as his mother's son.
While "shocking" seems to be a common word applied to his story, none of the contents are particularly surprising if you're familiar with the dynamics of dysfunctional families and institutional oppression. It's all there and it tracks.
What I didn't expect was the ways in which I identified with Harry's experience of a long distance serious relationship, his determination not to repeat the family mistakes, etc.
Other parts of the book were very much not for me, but the chapters were all short, making it easy to keep moving. I can appreciate the bravery it takes to own your (painful) story and share it, even while not yet having enough distance from parts of it to really dig deep.
My critiques are not for how he's handled the situation with his family. It's easy to judge from the outside and with emotional distance how you might have done things differently, to take potshots that give a sense of superiority. It's a different thing altogether to be inside such emotionally fraught circumstances doing the best you can.
The book works if you loved Diana or want to know more about the lives of the family without all the PR shine (like Charles doing headstands in his boxers). If you really connect with stories about dysfunctional families or a controlling, spiteful older brother, Harry has you covered. Maybe you want to read the story of a man who had a painful start in life, but he's doing the work, making mistakes, and trying to change his narrative from the foreordained conclusion. Check, check. My reasons are my own, but any of the above a good entry points for connecting.
If you're looking for an insightful critique of the monarchy or probing into the history of its wrongs, this isn't that book. Colonialism is not reckoned with. And William's tantrum about Africa, as though it's his toy, is sickening.
The book is very personal, raw at times, seething against a villainous press and reeling under the relentless gaslighting and lies. There are places to roll your eyes and some funny moments. Harry is also tender as husband and father, grandson, and as his mother's son.
Content Warnings
Graphic: Grief, Mental illness, Racism, War, Bullying, Classism, Drug use, Emotional abuse, Gaslighting, Death of parent, Abandonment, Death, and Toxic relationship
Moderate: Violence, Cursing, Panic attacks/disorders, Misogyny, Alcohol, and Car accident
Minor: Miscarriage, Pregnancy, Colonisation, Suicidal thoughts, and Antisemitism