maggiestraveledbookshelf 's review for:

Maybe You Should Talk to Someone by Lori Gottlieb

4.5

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✨ Review ✨ 

📖 Maybe You Should Talk To Someone

✍🏻 Lori Gottlieb

☑️ Nonfiction

⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️💫 | 4.5

“…𝙬𝙚 𝙜𝙧𝙤𝙬 𝙞𝙣 𝙘𝙤𝙣𝙣𝙚𝙘𝙩𝙞𝙤𝙣 𝙬𝙞𝙩𝙝 𝙤𝙩𝙝𝙚𝙧𝙨.”

Honest, poignant, and human. 

Overview:

•Therapist POV

•Memoir-ish

•Psychology Insights

•Candid and Wise

𝗜𝗻 𝗮 𝗯𝗲𝗵𝗶𝗻𝗱-𝘁𝗵𝗲-𝘀𝗰𝗲𝗻𝗲𝘀 𝗹𝗼𝗼𝗸 𝗼𝗳 𝗮 𝘁𝗵𝗲𝗿𝗮𝗽𝗶𝘀𝘁’𝘀 𝘄𝗼𝗿𝗹𝗱, 𝗚𝗼𝘁𝘁𝗹𝗶𝗲𝗯 𝗱𝗲𝘁𝗮𝗶𝗹𝘀 𝗵𝗲𝗿 𝗽𝗲𝗿𝘀𝗼𝗻𝗮𝗹 𝗲𝘅𝗽𝗲𝗿𝗶𝗲𝗻𝗰𝗲 𝘁𝗵𝗿𝗼𝘂𝗴𝗵 𝘁𝗵𝗲𝗿𝗮𝗽𝘆 𝘄𝗵𝗶𝗹𝗲 𝗮𝗹𝘀𝗼 𝘄𝗼𝗿𝗸𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝘄𝗶𝘁𝗵 𝗵𝗲𝗿 𝗼𝘄𝗻 𝗽𝗮𝘁𝗶𝗲𝗻𝘁𝘀, 𝗲𝘅𝗮𝗺𝗶𝗻𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝘄𝗵𝗮𝘁 𝗶𝘁 𝗺𝗲𝗮𝗻𝘀 𝘁𝗼 𝗯𝗲 𝗵𝘂𝗺𝗮𝗻 𝗮𝗻𝗱 𝘁𝗼 𝗰𝗵𝗮𝗻𝗴𝗲.

This was such a fascinating read! While this could’ve easily become pedantic or pandering, Gottlieb wrote in a way that equally entertains and educates. Easily readable - almost like a novel. 

Gottlieb introduced us to a variety of her patients (names/details altered for privacy of course), for example: a newlywed diagnosed with terminal cancer, an abrasive television show writer, and an older woman with a haunted past. 

Each of their stories and journeys with Gottlieb is nuanced and heartbreaking, and I saw so much of myself in these stories of challenging growth and discomfort. 

“𝙒𝙚 𝙘𝙖𝙣’𝙩 𝙝𝙖𝙫𝙚 𝙘𝙝𝙖𝙣𝙜𝙚 𝙬𝙞𝙩𝙝𝙤𝙪𝙩 𝙡𝙤𝙨𝙨, 𝙬𝙝𝙞𝙘𝙝 𝙞𝙨 𝙬𝙝𝙮 𝙨𝙤 𝙤𝙛𝙩𝙚𝙣 𝙥𝙚𝙤𝙥𝙡𝙚 𝙨𝙖𝙮 𝙩𝙝𝙚𝙮 𝙬𝙖𝙣𝙩 𝙘𝙝𝙖𝙣𝙜𝙚 𝙗𝙪𝙩 𝙣𝙤𝙣𝙚𝙩𝙝𝙚𝙡𝙚𝙨𝙨 𝙨𝙩𝙖𝙮 𝙚𝙭𝙖𝙘𝙩𝙡𝙮 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙨𝙖𝙢𝙚.”

Intermixed with their stories, Gottlieb experienced her own life changes and decided to embark on her own journey with a therapist she called Wendell.

While her story wasn’t as compelling, I respected and appreciated her vulnerable honesty. The lessons she learns are incredibly beneficial for everyone, myself included. 

“𝙔𝙤𝙪 𝙘𝙖𝙣’𝙩 𝙜𝙚𝙩 𝙩𝙝𝙧𝙤𝙪𝙜𝙝 𝙮𝙤𝙪𝙧 𝙥𝙖𝙞𝙣 𝙗𝙮 𝙙𝙞𝙢𝙞𝙣𝙞𝙨𝙝𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙞𝙩, 𝙝𝙚 𝙧𝙚𝙢𝙞𝙣𝙙𝙚𝙙 𝙢𝙚. 𝙔𝙤𝙪 𝙜𝙚𝙩 𝙩𝙝𝙧𝙤𝙪𝙜𝙝 𝙮𝙤𝙪𝙧 𝙥𝙖𝙞𝙣 𝙗𝙮 𝙖𝙘𝙘𝙚𝙥𝙩𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙞𝙩 𝙖𝙣𝙙 𝙛𝙞𝙜𝙪𝙧𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙤𝙪𝙩 𝙬𝙝𝙖𝙩 𝙩𝙤 𝙙𝙤 𝙬𝙞𝙩𝙝 𝙞𝙩.”

Also - if you’re even been to therapy, you know:

“𝙈𝙖𝙣𝙮 𝙥𝙖𝙩𝙞𝙚𝙣𝙩𝙨 𝙨𝙚𝙘𝙧𝙚𝙩𝙡𝙮 𝙬𝙞𝙨𝙝 𝙩𝙤 𝙗𝙚 𝙩𝙝𝙚𝙞𝙧 𝙩𝙝𝙚𝙧𝙖𝙥𝙞𝙨𝙩’𝙨 𝙤𝙣𝙡𝙮 𝙥𝙖𝙩𝙞𝙚𝙣𝙩. 𝙊𝙧, 𝙖𝙩 𝙡𝙚𝙖𝙨𝙩, 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙛𝙖𝙫𝙤𝙧𝙞𝙩𝙚—𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙛𝙪𝙣𝙣𝙞𝙚𝙨𝙩, 𝙢𝙤𝙨𝙩 𝙚𝙣𝙩𝙚𝙧𝙩𝙖𝙞𝙣𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙖𝙣𝙙, 𝙖𝙗𝙤𝙫𝙚 𝙖𝙡𝙡, 𝙢𝙤𝙨𝙩 𝙗𝙚𝙡𝙤𝙫𝙚𝙙.”

In both her own experience and her patients’ stories, the therapy journey was depicted in the most empathetic and pointed way. It showcased how normal it is that we use tactics to hide our emotions and insecurities, and how therapists can point out problematic patterns in ways to effectuate positive change. 

“[He] 𝙨𝙖𝙮𝙨 𝙩𝙝𝙖𝙩 𝙩𝙝𝙞𝙨 𝙞𝙨 𝙚𝙭𝙖𝙘𝙩𝙡𝙮 𝙬𝙝𝙖𝙩 𝙝𝙚 𝙙𝙞𝙙𝙣’𝙩 𝙬𝙖𝙣𝙩 𝙩𝙤 𝙝𝙖𝙥𝙥𝙚𝙣, 𝙩𝙝𝙖𝙩 𝙝𝙚 𝙙𝙞𝙙𝙣’𝙩 𝙘𝙤𝙢𝙚 𝙝𝙚𝙧𝙚 𝙩𝙤 𝙝𝙖𝙫𝙚 𝙖 𝙗𝙧𝙚𝙖𝙠𝙙𝙤𝙬𝙣. 𝘽𝙪𝙩 𝙄 𝙖𝙨𝙨𝙪𝙧𝙚 𝙝𝙞𝙢 𝙩𝙝𝙖𝙩 𝙝𝙚’𝙨 𝙣𝙤𝙩 𝙗𝙧𝙚𝙖𝙠𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙙𝙤𝙬𝙣; 𝙝𝙚’𝙨 𝙗𝙧𝙚𝙖𝙠𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙤𝙥𝙚𝙣.”

As an added bonus, Gottlieb included some interesting psychology lessons and quotes that expanded my understanding in ways I didn’t expect. 

𝙄 𝙥𝙖𝙧𝙩𝙞𝙘𝙪𝙡𝙖𝙧𝙡𝙮 𝙡𝙞𝙠𝙚𝙙 𝙩𝙝𝙞𝙨 𝙡𝙞𝙣𝙚 𝙛𝙧𝙤𝙢 𝙁𝙧𝙖𝙣𝙠𝙡’𝙨 𝙗𝙤𝙤𝙠: “𝘽𝙚𝙩𝙬𝙚𝙚𝙣 𝙨𝙩𝙞𝙢𝙪𝙡𝙪𝙨 𝙖𝙣𝙙 𝙧𝙚𝙨𝙥𝙤𝙣𝙨𝙚 𝙩𝙝𝙚𝙧𝙚 𝙞𝙨 𝙖 𝙨𝙥𝙖𝙘𝙚. 𝙄𝙣 𝙩𝙝𝙖𝙩 𝙨𝙥𝙖𝙘𝙚 𝙞𝙨 𝙤𝙪𝙧 𝙥𝙤𝙬𝙚𝙧 𝙩𝙤 𝙘𝙝𝙤𝙤𝙨𝙚 𝙤𝙪𝙧 𝙧𝙚𝙨𝙥𝙤𝙣𝙨𝙚. 𝙄𝙣 𝙤𝙪𝙧 𝙧𝙚𝙨𝙥𝙤𝙣𝙨𝙚 𝙡𝙞𝙚𝙨 𝙤𝙪𝙧 𝙜𝙧𝙤𝙬𝙩𝙝 𝙖𝙣𝙙 𝙤𝙪𝙧 𝙛𝙧𝙚𝙚𝙙𝙤𝙢.”

By the end of this book, Gottlieb really solidified her stance on how important the connections we have with other people are.

This is something I know to be true, but it’s more impactful to hear it laid out just like this: 

“𝙍𝙚𝙡𝙖𝙩𝙞𝙤𝙣𝙨𝙝𝙞𝙥𝙨 𝙞𝙣 𝙡𝙞𝙛𝙚 𝙙𝙤𝙣’𝙩 𝙧𝙚𝙖𝙡𝙡𝙮 𝙚𝙣𝙙, 𝙚𝙫𝙚𝙣 𝙞𝙛 𝙮𝙤𝙪 𝙣𝙚𝙫𝙚𝙧 𝙨𝙚𝙚 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙥𝙚𝙧𝙨𝙤𝙣 𝙖𝙜𝙖𝙞𝙣. 𝙀𝙫𝙚𝙧𝙮 𝙥𝙚𝙧𝙨𝙤𝙣 𝙮𝙤𝙪’𝙫𝙚 𝙗𝙚𝙚𝙣 𝙘𝙡𝙤𝙨𝙚 𝙩𝙤 𝙡𝙞𝙫𝙚𝙨 𝙤𝙣 𝙨𝙤𝙢𝙚𝙬𝙝𝙚𝙧𝙚 𝙞𝙣𝙨𝙞𝙙𝙚 𝙮𝙤𝙪. 𝙔𝙤𝙪𝙧 𝙥𝙖𝙨𝙩 𝙡𝙤𝙫𝙚𝙧𝙨, 𝙮𝙤𝙪𝙧 𝙥𝙖𝙧𝙚𝙣𝙩𝙨, 𝙮𝙤𝙪𝙧 𝙛𝙧𝙞𝙚𝙣𝙙𝙨, 𝙥𝙚𝙤𝙥𝙡𝙚 𝙗𝙤𝙩𝙝 𝙖𝙡𝙞𝙫𝙚 𝙖𝙣𝙙 𝙙𝙚𝙖𝙙 (𝙨𝙮𝙢𝙗𝙤𝙡𝙞𝙘𝙖𝙡𝙡𝙮 𝙤𝙧 𝙡𝙞𝙩𝙚𝙧𝙖𝙡𝙡𝙮)—𝙖𝙡𝙡 𝙤𝙛 𝙩𝙝𝙚𝙢 𝙚𝙫𝙤𝙠𝙚 𝙢𝙚𝙢𝙤𝙧𝙞𝙚𝙨, 𝙘𝙤𝙣𝙨𝙘𝙞𝙤𝙪𝙨 𝙤𝙧 𝙣𝙤𝙩. 𝙊𝙛𝙩𝙚𝙣 𝙩𝙝𝙚𝙮 𝙞𝙣𝙛𝙤𝙧𝙢 𝙝𝙤𝙬 𝙮𝙤𝙪 𝙧𝙚𝙡𝙖𝙩𝙚 𝙩𝙤 𝙮𝙤𝙪𝙧𝙨𝙚𝙡𝙛 𝙖𝙣𝙙 𝙤𝙩𝙝𝙚𝙧𝙨.”

I’ve always believed that everyone could benefit from therapy, and this book completely reinforces that. And honestly it makes me want to get back into therapy myself.

Any book that reinforces the benefits of looking after our mental health is important. In case you need to hear it: You matter. You are worthy of love and connection.

Overall, I highly recommend this book to everyone. 

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