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A review by alex_ellermann
The 5 Love Languages: The Secret to Love That Lasts by Gary Chapman
4.0
'The 5 Love Languages' provides a mental framework to help the reader grasp one fundamental truth: don't treat others as you would have others treat you. Rather, treat others as others would have you treat them.
Within the context of a marriage, this translates to learning which actions one can take to make one's spouse feel loved. The challenge, of course, is that everyone's different. One person might show love by working hard to maintain a neat and tidy household, but those efforts may be worthless when done for someone who values other behaviors far more. To help readers wrap their heads around this idea, Dr. Chapman posits five "love languages:" words of affirmation, acts of service, (giving or) receiving gifts, quality time, and physical touch. He goes on to write that most of us "speak" one or two of these languages and "send" our messages of love in them. If, however, our loved ones "speak" different languages, those messages may fall on deaf ears and lead our loved ones to, in fact, feel unloved.
How to determine the love languages of those about whom we care? Ask them. How to cultivate behaviors that will "speak" to them in the language(s) they understand? Practice. How to know whether it's working? You'll know.
And that's it in a nutshell. This is a short book, one with a simple message well explained. We aren't talking about a huge investment of time, and it's an investment worth making. I recommend 'The 5 Love Languages.'
Within the context of a marriage, this translates to learning which actions one can take to make one's spouse feel loved. The challenge, of course, is that everyone's different. One person might show love by working hard to maintain a neat and tidy household, but those efforts may be worthless when done for someone who values other behaviors far more. To help readers wrap their heads around this idea, Dr. Chapman posits five "love languages:" words of affirmation, acts of service, (giving or) receiving gifts, quality time, and physical touch. He goes on to write that most of us "speak" one or two of these languages and "send" our messages of love in them. If, however, our loved ones "speak" different languages, those messages may fall on deaf ears and lead our loved ones to, in fact, feel unloved.
How to determine the love languages of those about whom we care? Ask them. How to cultivate behaviors that will "speak" to them in the language(s) they understand? Practice. How to know whether it's working? You'll know.
And that's it in a nutshell. This is a short book, one with a simple message well explained. We aren't talking about a huge investment of time, and it's an investment worth making. I recommend 'The 5 Love Languages.'