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A review by sheela110
Battle Hymn of the Tiger Mother by Amy Chua
2.0
There's only one thought that comes to mind having read this controversial memoir on Chinese parenting: MORTIFIED. I was mortified by the author's ideals, her disciplinary actions towards her daughters, and from a literary standpoint, kind of irritated by the poor writing and lack of depth & insight (which is ironic as she criticizes her daughters for writing their speeches with a lack of insight). This is coming from a girl who was raised by Indian parenting, which as she touches upon in the book, is very similar to her own views on how to raise kids. I understand the value of discipline, but not to this extent. I also understand the value of respect, childhood and self-esteem, which the author clearly disregards.
First off, this book was intended to shock readers and sell books. At first, I wanted to call the author brave for having revealed such personal, heart-breaking stories. However, having seen some of her interviews on The Today show, Good Morning America, etc., her stories in the memoir seem a little more exaggerated. The rebellion of her daughter was probably more of a singular act of defiance than her actually losing her sh*t and going mental. The hair incident felt written for dramatic effect, but what was the actual point? What was the resolution? Her daughters posed questions at the end such as "How is this better than Western parenting?" and I believe she never truly answered this question. Her criticism of Western parenting may have found more merit had this book been written from a scientific approach or if we could hear from the perspective of the daughters (did they turn out to be interesting individuals or just robots?). As written, I think the author lost the argument that Chinese parenting is better than Western parenting and lost the readers and their support in the process.
Much of her children's success resulted from their own hard work, talent and let's be honest, a genetic advantage (both parents are smart cookies themselves). It is true that their work ethic stems from a strict regimen that she placed on them at a young age, but even at the resolution of the book, I don't think she valued their independent spirit or gave them any credit for their success. In fact, I didn't even see the author learn from her mistakes, grow or come to any realization at the end.
The whole tone of the book was meant to be provocative, but honestly, she came across pretentious and stereotypical (oh! white people drink wine and do yoga!) Was she trying to be funny and sarcastic? (Then she failed). Dogs don't have professions?!? WHAT?! Har har! Her matter of fact attitude comes across as rude, insensitive, and obtuse. The transitions bothered me the most. She goes from "marrying Jewish" to discussing disabled people in one chapter. There was a major lack of insight when she casually mentions an incident, but fails to explain how this influenced the overarching story. What did Sophia gnawing on the piano symbolize? How did Jed and the long commute in the beginning of their relationship affect Sophia? She touches upon Sophia not being very social, then continues to the next story. Not to mention, she barely acknowledges running over her daughter's foot. Did this not seem like a good discussion point - in any sane person's life, this would influence any girl's childhood.
I understand she's not trying to make friends with any of the readers, but this is hypocrisy at its best. She talks about respect and individual growth. But, she has no respect for her kids and especially her husband. A follow-up to this book should be stories written from the perspective of her family - what did her husband think of his wife's inability to compromise or even consult him on how to raise their kids? How sad were the girls as they lost their childhood?
Overall, it was an interesting read. How many books can produce such intense discussions? I may not agree with the author's viewpoint and writing, but at least she created a thought-provoking book.
First off, this book was intended to shock readers and sell books. At first, I wanted to call the author brave for having revealed such personal, heart-breaking stories. However, having seen some of her interviews on The Today show, Good Morning America, etc., her stories in the memoir seem a little more exaggerated. The rebellion of her daughter was probably more of a singular act of defiance than her actually losing her sh*t and going mental. The hair incident felt written for dramatic effect, but what was the actual point? What was the resolution? Her daughters posed questions at the end such as "How is this better than Western parenting?" and I believe she never truly answered this question. Her criticism of Western parenting may have found more merit had this book been written from a scientific approach or if we could hear from the perspective of the daughters (did they turn out to be interesting individuals or just robots?). As written, I think the author lost the argument that Chinese parenting is better than Western parenting and lost the readers and their support in the process.
Much of her children's success resulted from their own hard work, talent and let's be honest, a genetic advantage (both parents are smart cookies themselves). It is true that their work ethic stems from a strict regimen that she placed on them at a young age, but even at the resolution of the book, I don't think she valued their independent spirit or gave them any credit for their success. In fact, I didn't even see the author learn from her mistakes, grow or come to any realization at the end.
The whole tone of the book was meant to be provocative, but honestly, she came across pretentious and stereotypical (oh! white people drink wine and do yoga!) Was she trying to be funny and sarcastic? (Then she failed). Dogs don't have professions?!? WHAT?! Har har! Her matter of fact attitude comes across as rude, insensitive, and obtuse. The transitions bothered me the most. She goes from "marrying Jewish" to discussing disabled people in one chapter. There was a major lack of insight when she casually mentions an incident, but fails to explain how this influenced the overarching story. What did Sophia gnawing on the piano symbolize? How did Jed and the long commute in the beginning of their relationship affect Sophia? She touches upon Sophia not being very social, then continues to the next story. Not to mention, she barely acknowledges running over her daughter's foot. Did this not seem like a good discussion point - in any sane person's life, this would influence any girl's childhood.
I understand she's not trying to make friends with any of the readers, but this is hypocrisy at its best. She talks about respect and individual growth. But, she has no respect for her kids and especially her husband. A follow-up to this book should be stories written from the perspective of her family - what did her husband think of his wife's inability to compromise or even consult him on how to raise their kids? How sad were the girls as they lost their childhood?
Overall, it was an interesting read. How many books can produce such intense discussions? I may not agree with the author's viewpoint and writing, but at least she created a thought-provoking book.