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A review by ruttery
Attached: The New Science of Adult Attachment and How It Can Help You Find—and Keep—Love by Amir Levine
3.0
Not really sure how to rate this. I do find attachment styles interesting and think the different styles generally hold true. However I can't help but feel that not everyone fits rigidly into a neat little box. Personally I felt my attachment style has changed depending on the dynamic of the relationship and I've probably been anxious, avoidant and secure within different situations.
This is very hetero and mononormative and gives no acknowledgement of non-heterosexual relationships or non-monogamy. Which is interesting as I feel my sexuality has definitely fed into my attachment style.
There was really no hope of redemption for avoidant attachment styles in this book, even though it seems both secure and anxious styles can do no wrong, no matter how smothering an anxious style may become. I also sensed a slight bit of judgment towards people who are happy being single and independent, or who don't necessarily "need" a romantic relationship. A shame as I feel avoidance is also a symptom of anxiety towards relationships rather than cold heartlessness. And that's speaking as someone who tends to lean secure-anxious.
That being said, secure partnerships are obviously a good thing to aim for and it's good to be aware of these things if you're someone who falls into the same patterns.
This is very hetero and mononormative and gives no acknowledgement of non-heterosexual relationships or non-monogamy. Which is interesting as I feel my sexuality has definitely fed into my attachment style.
There was really no hope of redemption for avoidant attachment styles in this book, even though it seems both secure and anxious styles can do no wrong, no matter how smothering an anxious style may become. I also sensed a slight bit of judgment towards people who are happy being single and independent, or who don't necessarily "need" a romantic relationship. A shame as I feel avoidance is also a symptom of anxiety towards relationships rather than cold heartlessness. And that's speaking as someone who tends to lean secure-anxious.
That being said, secure partnerships are obviously a good thing to aim for and it's good to be aware of these things if you're someone who falls into the same patterns.