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A review by aromarrie
Jonny Appleseed by Joshua Whitehead
reflective
sad
slow-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? N/A
- Strong character development? N/A
- Loveable characters? N/A
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
4.25
i’m currently taking a poetry in performance course for the spring semester at my college and i learned something interesting just last night. according to my professor’s lecture notes, “when reading poetry, it’s often about the wonder of what treasures there are to find in a poem, where each and every element has been given the attention and love a poem demands”.
reading this story felt like reading poetry at its core, felt like a lesson plan that showed me what it meant to be really honest, what it feels like to read someone spill their guts and not care to make it more appealing, they’re just there. it’s messy, it’s uncomfortable, it’s confusing, but it’s so gripping and you’re highlighting every page because there’s significance in so many pieces of the narrative it flies all around you.
one of my favorite parts from this story was the relationships that jonny, our mc, carry so close to his heart, recounting memories with such dark humor but with all the bare bones of it—“i wish that he [one of jonny’s clients(?)] knew that when a NDN laughs, it’s because they’re applying a fresh layer of medicine on an open wound (chapter v)”. there’s so much pain, so much weight to carry that there’s brief moments where it feels like all jonny could do was scream out to release all contents inside him—but in his day to day life, in the stories and experiences he’s had with other people on the rez and in the city he’s living in now, it’s like he has to live between two different places at once.
physically, he’s having this conversation with someone and he can listen as their words register in his mind but mentally, he has to create another visual that this conversation conjures up because all he’s made up of is memories and just existing feels like constantly having to reconcile the past with the present.
sex itself is so immersive and almost like a taboo, but it’s one of the most vulnerable topics to delve into and jonny immerses himself in the act. it’s not just about being with the other person, physically, but there’s moments inbetween where he feels like he’s fucking himself, too. he and his body are like two separate entities that are visible to others and not only does that attach itself to the “mortifying ideal of being known” but also to getting to know yourself. jonny learns just as much about himself through sex as he does in the intimacy that comes with revealing your body to someone else’s. sometimes it just seems like a simple contract, a give and take, but i love how much being in jonny’s head made it seem that there’s more to learn from them than one would think.
human life is all about transaction, what you’re willing to lose in order to gain, but that’s something that we can’t even grapple with ourselves because we’re too blind to realize that there’s so much more to that. the intensity and bare truth that the author gave in writing through jonny was very addictive, and like i said before, it felt like seeing poetry in action.
“Maybe that’s why the only bit of me I left was a ghost? I guess that’s all we left each other, eh Kokum, just each other’s spirits? One for you, one for Momma too—maybe that’s why Manito gifted me two? Manito gifted me enough to travel out and in and all that space between, to weave like those old rapids do, and to carry memories as a souvenir between this world and the fourth, where I’ll finally come home and have nothing but my glories to share with you.”
this book is incredible.
reading this story felt like reading poetry at its core, felt like a lesson plan that showed me what it meant to be really honest, what it feels like to read someone spill their guts and not care to make it more appealing, they’re just there. it’s messy, it’s uncomfortable, it’s confusing, but it’s so gripping and you’re highlighting every page because there’s significance in so many pieces of the narrative it flies all around you.
one of my favorite parts from this story was the relationships that jonny, our mc, carry so close to his heart, recounting memories with such dark humor but with all the bare bones of it—“i wish that he [one of jonny’s clients(?)] knew that when a NDN laughs, it’s because they’re applying a fresh layer of medicine on an open wound (chapter v)”. there’s so much pain, so much weight to carry that there’s brief moments where it feels like all jonny could do was scream out to release all contents inside him—but in his day to day life, in the stories and experiences he’s had with other people on the rez and in the city he’s living in now, it’s like he has to live between two different places at once.
physically, he’s having this conversation with someone and he can listen as their words register in his mind but mentally, he has to create another visual that this conversation conjures up because all he’s made up of is memories and just existing feels like constantly having to reconcile the past with the present.
sex itself is so immersive and almost like a taboo, but it’s one of the most vulnerable topics to delve into and jonny immerses himself in the act. it’s not just about being with the other person, physically, but there’s moments inbetween where he feels like he’s fucking himself, too. he and his body are like two separate entities that are visible to others and not only does that attach itself to the “mortifying ideal of being known” but also to getting to know yourself. jonny learns just as much about himself through sex as he does in the intimacy that comes with revealing your body to someone else’s. sometimes it just seems like a simple contract, a give and take, but i love how much being in jonny’s head made it seem that there’s more to learn from them than one would think.
human life is all about transaction, what you’re willing to lose in order to gain, but that’s something that we can’t even grapple with ourselves because we’re too blind to realize that there’s so much more to that. the intensity and bare truth that the author gave in writing through jonny was very addictive, and like i said before, it felt like seeing poetry in action.
“Maybe that’s why the only bit of me I left was a ghost? I guess that’s all we left each other, eh Kokum, just each other’s spirits? One for you, one for Momma too—maybe that’s why Manito gifted me two? Manito gifted me enough to travel out and in and all that space between, to weave like those old rapids do, and to carry memories as a souvenir between this world and the fourth, where I’ll finally come home and have nothing but my glories to share with you.”
this book is incredible.
Content Warnings
Graphic: Sexual content
Moderate: Bullying, Death, Homophobia, Physical abuse, Grief, and Alcohol