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A review by fogthroughthevalley
Come as You Are: The Surprising New Science That Will Transform Your Sex Life by Emily Nagoski
funny
informative
medium-paced
4.75
Overall, a really informative and fun read. I had some of the pieces of the sexual puzzle, but this read put everything together for me.
Important takeaways:
-There are brakes as well as accelerators in sex. These can be mental/emotional or physical.
-Things that turn us on are cultural, there are no inate triggers. Pavlovian response for cis women (cis men get it from environment surrounding sudden erections).
-Arousal non-concordance: parts and mind are not on the same page (most extreme example: orgasming from SA). Parts look for sexually relevant things/actions, mind looks for context.
Something that made me laugh: What turns you on question asked in a survey had one respondent say slash fanfiction of Harry Potter and Draco Malfoy. 💀
Important takeaways:
-There are brakes as well as accelerators in sex. These can be mental/emotional or physical.
-Things that turn us on are cultural, there are no inate triggers. Pavlovian response for cis women (cis men get it from environment surrounding sudden erections).
-Arousal non-concordance: parts and mind are not on the same page (most extreme example: orgasming from SA). Parts look for sexually relevant things/actions, mind looks for context.
Something that made me laugh: What turns you on question asked in a survey had one respondent say slash fanfiction of Harry Potter and Draco Malfoy. 💀
Content Warnings
Moderate: Sexual assault and Rape