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A review by kajalhalwa
Delivered from Distraction: Getting the Most out of Life with Attention Deficit Disorder by John J. Ratey, Edward M. Hallowell
4.0
I really liked how kindheartedly the author conveys lots of good advice here. I appreciate the variety of anecdotes provided and I really appreciate the admission that the North American psychiatric system is quite a mess and frequently fails patients. I like that frequent tips are "get diagnosed", "hone your strengths", "know yourself", "don't isolate", "ask for help" as well as the concept of "good enough".
A lot of info here unfortunately comes heavily from heteronormative, middle to upper class and male perspectives. I'm also a wary of the oft-repeated advice to "Marry the right person". I believe a way to interpret this is "don't marry the wrong person". I also believe it's about surrounding oneself with people who both accept you as you are and support you in achieving your goals. I do think that it risks advising people to marry on the basis of the other's usefulness to them and to have their spouse pick up their slack.
Also this advice re finding a partner is okay until the last sentence:
"10. Think of the person you’d really like to see yourself with. Then ask her out. What’s the worst that can happen? You get rejected. So what? Remember, no is just the first step on the way to yes."
Maybe it means "move on till you find someone who says Yes right away", but obviously without this caveat it comes off as "ignore her boundaries".
I also know that not everyone wants a partner or does well with one. Some people make for terrible partners or have had experiences that make relationships uncomfortably stressful. Some people just don't work that way. I'd like to have seen more explicitly inclusive ideas, like how friends support each other. That being said, I do like that when you extrapolate the advice you can see that the main intent is to encourage people to maintain healthy human connections, which benefits everyone.
A lot of info here unfortunately comes heavily from heteronormative, middle to upper class and male perspectives. I'm also a wary of the oft-repeated advice to "Marry the right person". I believe a way to interpret this is "don't marry the wrong person". I also believe it's about surrounding oneself with people who both accept you as you are and support you in achieving your goals. I do think that it risks advising people to marry on the basis of the other's usefulness to them and to have their spouse pick up their slack.
Also this advice re finding a partner is okay until the last sentence:
"10. Think of the person you’d really like to see yourself with. Then ask her out. What’s the worst that can happen? You get rejected. So what? Remember, no is just the first step on the way to yes."
Maybe it means "move on till you find someone who says Yes right away", but obviously without this caveat it comes off as "ignore her boundaries".
I also know that not everyone wants a partner or does well with one. Some people make for terrible partners or have had experiences that make relationships uncomfortably stressful. Some people just don't work that way. I'd like to have seen more explicitly inclusive ideas, like how friends support each other. That being said, I do like that when you extrapolate the advice you can see that the main intent is to encourage people to maintain healthy human connections, which benefits everyone.