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A review by jbellomy
Emmett by L.C. Rosen
lighthearted
fast-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? A mix
- Strong character development? No
- Loveable characters? No
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
2.0
A fantastic concept is wasted on this absolutely cursed text.
Emmett Woodhouse is a semi-professional vibe curator, menace of a twink, and full-time sociopath. And he's surrounded by freaks. The only human people in this book are Miles' moms and Miles himself (Knightley), and he needs to RUN. FAR AWAY.
Emmett's narrative voice comes across like he's ten years old, which makes it all the more disorienting when it cuts to a post-sex scene. The sentences are short, the language juvenile, the thought patterns barely past the mirror stage. The world building is even more nauseating -- think a very stupid Instagram stand-in and an ever-present string quartet playing the hits, ripped directly from Bridgerton. Worse still are the visuals of things meant to be "beautiful." We've got the ugliest school uniforms known to man, the truly unwearable jewelry collection made by Emmett's bff (a collection, mind you, that's meant to get her into FIT), and far too much zebra-print-and-pink. By the end, I imagined the author cackling as they wrote these descriptions, delighting in the truly hideous images they were creating.
Anyways. As much as I hoped this would fulfill all my queer Austen dreams, I guess it's not a huge loss. We already had a modern Emma for the girls and the gays. It was called Clueless.
Emmett Woodhouse is a semi-professional vibe curator, menace of a twink, and full-time sociopath. And he's surrounded by freaks. The only human people in this book are Miles' moms and Miles himself (Knightley), and he needs to RUN. FAR AWAY.
Emmett's narrative voice comes across like he's ten years old, which makes it all the more disorienting when it cuts to a post-sex scene. The sentences are short, the language juvenile, the thought patterns barely past the mirror stage. The world building is even more nauseating -- think a very stupid Instagram stand-in and an ever-present string quartet playing the hits, ripped directly from Bridgerton. Worse still are the visuals of things meant to be "beautiful." We've got the ugliest school uniforms known to man, the truly unwearable jewelry collection made by Emmett's bff (a collection, mind you, that's meant to get her into FIT), and far too much zebra-print-and-pink. By the end, I imagined the author cackling as they wrote these descriptions, delighting in the truly hideous images they were creating.
Anyways. As much as I hoped this would fulfill all my queer Austen dreams, I guess it's not a huge loss. We already had a modern Emma for the girls and the gays. It was called Clueless.