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A review by whatsmacksaid
Why Does He Do That? by Lundy Bancroft
challenging
dark
hopeful
informative
medium-paced
This is essentially a handbook for people in an abusive relationship, or people who think they might be, but aren't sure. The author speaks directly to that audience ("he might try XYZ, but this is to deliberately confuse you and escape responsibility," etc.) in a frank and readable way.
It's a tough subject, obviously, but the book wasn't as depressing as I expected it to be. It's both an explainer of the mentalities abusive people hold and a guide to help abused people figure out their next steps.
It's also worth mentioning that the author goes out of his way to explain that he's using binary gender terminology even though everything he writes about could apply to a same sex couple. He circles back to that multiple times.
It's a tough subject, obviously, but the book wasn't as depressing as I expected it to be. It's both an explainer of the mentalities abusive people hold and a guide to help abused people figure out their next steps.
It's also worth mentioning that the author goes out of his way to explain that he's using binary gender terminology even though everything he writes about could apply to a same sex couple. He circles back to that multiple times.
Content Warnings
Graphic: Domestic abuse
Moderate: Violence
Minor: Sexual assault, Sexual violence, and Sexual harassment