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A review by lbarsk
Come as You Are: The Surprising New Science That Will Transform Your Sex Life by Emily Nagoski
3.0
3.5 stars.
This was a pretty interesting read, in part because I'm not dating or sleeping with people at the moment and in part because so much of it felt more like therapy than Talk About Sex. I appreciated the way Nagoski tries to break down societal myths and tries to address as many different problems as possible, and there's stuff that she wrote in here that can 100% be applied to mental health outside of the sexual context that I am still thinking about!
My main issue here is that the book is very cis-women-centric. Nagoski DOES acknowledge this right at the beginning, which I appreciated, but there's a big difference between acknowledging that you're focused on cis women and then actually writing a book that's inclusive of trans women. Many of the messages in the book can definitely be used by trans women -- many of them are about like, affirming oneself and being kind to oneself, etc. -- but there's also a lot that really is just for cis women, which is unfortunate.
This was a pretty interesting read, in part because I'm not dating or sleeping with people at the moment and in part because so much of it felt more like therapy than Talk About Sex. I appreciated the way Nagoski tries to break down societal myths and tries to address as many different problems as possible, and there's stuff that she wrote in here that can 100% be applied to mental health outside of the sexual context that I am still thinking about!
My main issue here is that the book is very cis-women-centric. Nagoski DOES acknowledge this right at the beginning, which I appreciated, but there's a big difference between acknowledging that you're focused on cis women and then actually writing a book that's inclusive of trans women. Many of the messages in the book can definitely be used by trans women -- many of them are about like, affirming oneself and being kind to oneself, etc. -- but there's also a lot that really is just for cis women, which is unfortunate.