Take a photo of a barcode or cover
jacquilogan 's review for:
The Coward
by Jarred McGinnis
The Coward – Jarred McGinnis, it is supposed to be fiction, but the main character has the same name and many features of the book also happened. Jarred is a young man who has had a troubled few years. His mum died, he is estranged from his dad a recovering alcoholic and then he is involved in a car accident which has left him in a wheelchair. With no where else to go he calls his dad to come a pick him up from the hospital and the story is then how an angry young man and his dad can learn to live together again. There was a passage in this book that really hit home for me
‘One day I walked and the next I couldn’t. In one way, it was better than if I had had a degenerative disease with function slowly leaching away. Having constantly to readjust to a slightly worse status quo, over and over, accumulating resentment.’
In my late 20’s I found out I had an eye condition which will led to me losing my sight, in fact I had already lost a lot but hadn’t realised. In my late 30’s I was diagnosed with diabetes, first thought was more damage to my eyes, but no for me almost immediately it was my nerve endings that became hypersensitive. My feet felt like they were on fire all the time, this made walking extremely painful and uncomfortable, the more I walked the more pain I would be in especially at night. This meant I started using a mobility scooter or wheelchair before I was 40, not exactly a good look but at least it meant I still have freedom to get out and about. Would I have felt better off losing my slight suddenly and quickly, because although I have lost a of of peripheral vision to the point I am now registered blind, I still have central vision so can still read. I do read on my tablet a lot more now so I can adjust the text and background and listen to audiobooks. Having lost it so slowly and gradually I am not aware that I have lost vision until I fall or trip over something on the floor, because who knew you are supposed to see the floor when you are walking along I didn’t. As for using a mobility scooter, my legs do work I can walk short distances some days more than others.
I understand the frustration that Jarred feels not being about to do things for himself, that sitting in the car while someone else puts your wheels away in the back of the car. Being a different height when you go out and everyone else is standing up, you start to feel left out of conversations. That feeling of being in the way, trying to get people to move so you can get past, of taking up too much space.
‘One day I walked and the next I couldn’t. In one way, it was better than if I had had a degenerative disease with function slowly leaching away. Having constantly to readjust to a slightly worse status quo, over and over, accumulating resentment.’
In my late 20’s I found out I had an eye condition which will led to me losing my sight, in fact I had already lost a lot but hadn’t realised. In my late 30’s I was diagnosed with diabetes, first thought was more damage to my eyes, but no for me almost immediately it was my nerve endings that became hypersensitive. My feet felt like they were on fire all the time, this made walking extremely painful and uncomfortable, the more I walked the more pain I would be in especially at night. This meant I started using a mobility scooter or wheelchair before I was 40, not exactly a good look but at least it meant I still have freedom to get out and about. Would I have felt better off losing my slight suddenly and quickly, because although I have lost a of of peripheral vision to the point I am now registered blind, I still have central vision so can still read. I do read on my tablet a lot more now so I can adjust the text and background and listen to audiobooks. Having lost it so slowly and gradually I am not aware that I have lost vision until I fall or trip over something on the floor, because who knew you are supposed to see the floor when you are walking along I didn’t. As for using a mobility scooter, my legs do work I can walk short distances some days more than others.
I understand the frustration that Jarred feels not being about to do things for himself, that sitting in the car while someone else puts your wheels away in the back of the car. Being a different height when you go out and everyone else is standing up, you start to feel left out of conversations. That feeling of being in the way, trying to get people to move so you can get past, of taking up too much space.