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A review by mhinnen
The School for Good Mothers by Jessamine Chan
challenging
dark
sad
tense
medium-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? A mix
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? No
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
3.5
This was a hard book to read. On the one hand, it was clear that Frida was not the best mother and she showed a serious lapse in judgment which left her child open to serious danger (not to mention her choice in men). At the same time, it shines a light on the lack of support for many mothers and the impossible expectations placed on them in the US.
As someone who was a single teenage mom, I am grateful for the community I had to support me and give me space to eventually grow into a competent adult and good mother. I had low self-confidence and poor judgment. I look back and see so many situations that were potentially dangerous but in the moment seemed like the only option. As I became more self-assured and had more options, I became a better mother and my child's life was better balanced.
Rather than develop a sense of community, the School for Good Mothers instills trauma by separating parents from their children. The women weren't taught how to create networks to care for one another's children - everything was put on the individual mother and her "child." Vulnerable families are made even more vulnerable.
I didn't like Frida and it often felt like her concern was about her own loss and needs without a clear understanding of the impact her actions were having on her daughter. She never quite seemed to take responsibility for the danger she put her child in. Still, I felt for her and the other women - the experimental system they are caught up in is unfair and cruel. Her ex is never held accountable for his role that led to her Frida's circumstances and by extension their daughter's. And certainly the ways that race, ethnicity, gender, and marital status all placed Frida in an impossible situation.
As someone who was a single teenage mom, I am grateful for the community I had to support me and give me space to eventually grow into a competent adult and good mother. I had low self-confidence and poor judgment. I look back and see so many situations that were potentially dangerous but in the moment seemed like the only option. As I became more self-assured and had more options, I became a better mother and my child's life was better balanced.
Rather than develop a sense of community, the School for Good Mothers instills trauma by separating parents from their children. The women weren't taught how to create networks to care for one another's children - everything was put on the individual mother and her "child." Vulnerable families are made even more vulnerable.
I didn't like Frida and it often felt like her concern was about her own loss and needs without a clear understanding of the impact her actions were having on her daughter. She never quite seemed to take responsibility for the danger she put her child in. Still, I felt for her and the other women - the experimental system they are caught up in is unfair and cruel. Her ex is never held accountable for his role that led to her Frida's circumstances and by extension their daughter's. And certainly the ways that race, ethnicity, gender, and marital status all placed Frida in an impossible situation.