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A review by mangofandango
Yes, Daddy by Jonathan Parks-Ramage
dark
tense
medium-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? A mix
- Loveable characters? No
- Flaws of characters a main focus? N/A
3.0
I have mixed feelings about this one! I signed up for one thing and got sort of another, and I think that was intentional but it was less fun than I imagined it would be. Like, I expected dark, sexy gay thriller, and what it actually is is...dark, grim, sort of mysterious but not quite a thriller, not so much consensually sexy sex but definitely full of many rape scenes, with a main character that seems more like a symbol than an actual character somehow.
I read the discussion guide in the back because I found I finished the book somewhat unclear as to the author's intentions here. Like, it's a story about an ex-evangelical who was forced into conversion therapy, it's got lots of "you deserve this sexual assault, rape and abuse because you're gay" stuff going on because of that, it's trauma after trauma, and the specter of evangelicalism doesn't ever really leave - it gets a kinder re-brand toward the end. So I honestly couldn't tell if this book was operating on stereotypes, playing into some of the poison it represents, or intended to be an exploration of the ways spiritual, sexual, and emotional abuse plays out in these contexts. The author says he was trying to diversify the idea behind #MeToo and bring gay voices and an imperfect victim into it, so it's more the latter, but I didn't find that it was a very strong statement of anything because I couldn't quite tell which side he was on sometimes? Though now that I think about it, it is in some ways a sort of systematic way of telling the story of how someone might fall into an abusive situation, be traumatized, and find potential for healing afterwards.
Overall, I did like the book well enough and feel invested in the story. But I didn't love it. And if...any triggers around spiritual abuse, sexual abuse, rape, false reporting, relationship abuse, isolation etc etc. are an issue for you, I think you should steer clear of this one.
I read the discussion guide in the back because I found I finished the book somewhat unclear as to the author's intentions here. Like, it's a story about an ex-evangelical who was forced into conversion therapy, it's got lots of "you deserve this sexual assault, rape and abuse because you're gay" stuff going on because of that, it's trauma after trauma, and the specter of evangelicalism doesn't ever really leave - it gets a kinder re-brand toward the end. So I honestly couldn't tell if this book was operating on stereotypes, playing into some of the poison it represents, or intended to be an exploration of the ways spiritual, sexual, and emotional abuse plays out in these contexts. The author says he was trying to diversify the idea behind #MeToo and bring gay voices and an imperfect victim into it, so it's more the latter, but I didn't find that it was a very strong statement of anything because I couldn't quite tell which side he was on sometimes? Though now that I think about it, it is in some ways a sort of systematic way of telling the story of how someone might fall into an abusive situation, be traumatized, and find potential for healing afterwards.
Overall, I did like the book well enough and feel invested in the story. But I didn't love it. And if...any triggers around spiritual abuse, sexual abuse, rape, false reporting, relationship abuse, isolation etc etc. are an issue for you, I think you should steer clear of this one.
Content Warnings
Graphic: Domestic abuse, Suicidal thoughts, Rape, Sexual assault, Sexual harassment, Drug use, Sexual content, Sexual violence, and Alcohol