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A review by hollyocean
Le Morte d'Arthur: King Arthur and the Legends of the Round Table by Thomas Malory
3.0
Merlin fully lied to me about what to expect from the Aurthurian legends. Merlin might be borderline ridiculous and I knew its interpretation of the legends was loose at best but a more accurate representation of the day to day life of your average Knight of the Table Round can be found in Monty Python's the holy grail. These blokes speak like the overly emotion men of victorian era horror but worse, they are all so extra. It's a dangerous business to be a Knight and a bloody high turn-over rate for a seat at the round table because at least 10 of the 150 will be killed before the next Pentacost everytime. Also these knights need to take their helmets off before they launch into pointless fights about whether Dame Guinevere or Queen Margawse is the fairer jaut to check they are fighting someone they are related too.
Tristram is such a messy bitch as well. Like what's he got against telling people his name. 'Sir at this time ye shall not know my name' is his standard line, and then he's fuming when other poeple let slip who he is. And imagine going to Ireland where you're a wanted man and changing your name to Tramtrist to fool them into not killing you while you go get healed from Ireland's first attempt to kill you AND IT ACTUALLY WORKING!
Also Nimue trapping Merlin in a rock and leaving him there to die to escape his persistent sexual advances is such a power move.
Conflicted about whether to bother with the second volume because on the one hand I can get more Tristram being chaos incarnate but on the other hand the writing style makes me want to pluck my eyes out it's so repetative and simplistic all these knights doing 'such marvelous deeds at arms for to increase their worship that all men had great wonder and marvelled at their prowess'.
Tristram is such a messy bitch as well. Like what's he got against telling people his name. 'Sir at this time ye shall not know my name' is his standard line, and then he's fuming when other poeple let slip who he is. And imagine going to Ireland where you're a wanted man and changing your name to Tramtrist to fool them into not killing you while you go get healed from Ireland's first attempt to kill you AND IT ACTUALLY WORKING!
Also Nimue trapping Merlin in a rock and leaving him there to die to escape his persistent sexual advances is such a power move.
Conflicted about whether to bother with the second volume because on the one hand I can get more Tristram being chaos incarnate but on the other hand the writing style makes me want to pluck my eyes out it's so repetative and simplistic all these knights doing 'such marvelous deeds at arms for to increase their worship that all men had great wonder and marvelled at their prowess'.