A review by probablyjenna
Hold My Girl by Charlene Carr

fast-paced

4.5

Hold My Girl has me at a strange standstill because all I want to do is talk about it, yet finding the right words feels nearly impossible. No spoilers in this review, but I am going to talk a bit about the book’s content so if you prefer going into something totally blind, tread lightly. Also as a potential trigger warning: I will be discussing aspects of infertility.

It feels as if Charlene Carr split herself open emotionally in order to fully explore the pain, trauma, joy, and fear embedded into the IVF journey. Then, she took those emotions and added a layer of absolute devastation: what if the baby you thought was biologically yours actually was not? Who has more “claim” to the child?

I have never wanted children. I know very little about infertility or IVF, and have never longed for motherhood. Despite being so far removed from the two main characters of this novel, I felt remarkably invested in their experiences. I found myself AUDIBLY responding to moments in the story, feeling the hurt and pain of these characters so fully. They were both frustrating and endearing all at once.

I had no idea what outcome I wanted; logically, the decision seemed simple to me…and as a deeply logical person, that’s usually where I land. Yet, the magnitude of the situation compounded with the insecurities caused by infertility made it difficult to see things logically. Katherine, the main character, was not just fighting for her child; she was also fighting AGAINST so much of the stigma that surrounds IVF, made even more challenging considering her identity as a Black woman navigating predominantly white spaces.

Then there’s Tess, who also isn’t just fighting for her child; she is also fighting to be seen as something beyond a “failure” - a word she largely assigns to herself due to her infertility.

Y’all really just need to read this one. The concept is fascinating, the emotions are BIG, and Carr clearly writes from a place of deep knowing. Anytime an author is willing to get this vulnerable with readers I am instantly won over.